


Gothic Heart Diaries - The Personal Assistant

by SabinaMaria



Category: Blutengel (Band), Chris Pohl - Fandom
Genre: BDSM, Bisexuality, Bloodplay, Erotica, Explicit Language, Explicit Sexual Content, Multi, Rough Sex
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-06-06
Updated: 2017-01-15
Packaged: 2018-07-12 15:05:19
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 22
Words: 74,920
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7110517
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SabinaMaria/pseuds/SabinaMaria
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Erotic musings inspired by the ever seductive, Chris Pohl.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Wanted:  One Fresh Start

The 747 landed on the runway with a heavy “thud”, a bounce & a quick screech of tires. I was now in Berlin, my new home, & it was raining. Today I would get settled in my new apartment that my friends here had set up for me, & tomorrow I would meet my new employer, Chris Pohl.

My friend Claudia picked me up from the airport & drove me to my new home, a small but nicely furnished, one bedroom apartment on the 3rd floor of an older building. She helped me carry up my suitcases & before she left she handed me the keys & in a cheerful voice said, “Good luck tomorrow with Herr Pohl, & be careful, I hear he bites.” She winked & gave a little laugh as she hugged me goodbye, “Tschüss.”

“Tschüss,” I repeated with a smile. The heavy front door closed with a soft “whoosh”. I sat down on the couch & let out a sigh. Just a few months ago I was living in L.A., working as a personal assistant for a famous tv actor & enjoying my hectic but fun life. I also had a wonderful fiance who I thought the sun rose & set on until I found out that he was spending his “working” weekends with a flight attendant. He broke my heart into a million pieces. A couple of months after that the famous tv actor went into rehab & his family ended my employment with him as they would be taking over his personal affairs. I hid in my apartment for the next month nursing my broken heart. L.A. wasn’t much fun anymore & with Christmas coming up I just wanted to get away from everyone & everything. I ended up spending the holidays in Berlin with some German friends of mine & they were the ones who suggested I move there & start fresh. I explained that I couldn’t do that & they asked why. I had no real answer other than moving to another country would be too difficult, too complicated. They explained that people do it all the time & they would help me with the paperwork, finding a nice place to live & finding a job all before I even got there.

Once I returned home I spent a couple of weeks thinking about such a big change & then found myself signing on with an exclusive Berlin employment agency that specialized in finding personal assistants for upscale & celebrity clients. My friends had also begun the search for an apartment for me. I had jumped in with both feet & still wasn’t sure if I’d be able to swim, but my heart still hurt & I really wanted a change. That fresh start sounded good. 

Before I knew it I was in talks with Emiline, a representative from the agency. After a few weeks of sending paperwork & forms back & forth, & a couple of phone interviews, she offered me a position as a personal assistant to a celebrity contingent upon passing a final in-person interview at the agency in Berlin. The celebrity’s identity would be revealed only if I passed that final interview. One week later I was sitting in Emiline’s very well decorated, & flat out gorgeous corner office, in a high rise office building. I was nervous. My friend Claudia had found a cute apartment for me & paid the manager three months rent in advance to secure the unit in my name. I didn’t even have the job yet & I was already in debt. Emiline looked over my paperwork again & I could see her cat-like green eyes move slowly up & down the pages.

“Well, Madeline, I feel as if we’ve had a good talk today.” She flashed her emerald eyes at me over the file she held, “As you know I had two concerns, your weakness in the German language & you don’t have a car. Again, my client specifically requested someone fluent in both English & German & that they have their own vehicle since you’ll also be running errands, aside from your other duties.” She looked at me critically. 

“I’m taking an online language course & one of my friends has a second car that he’s going to loan me until I can buy my own.” I tried to sound cheerful.

Emiline was quiet for a moment before she spoke, “Yes, I do remember you telling me that, & I did forward that information to my client when I sent them a copy of your file.”

I felt my back tense in preparation for the “don’t call us, we’ll call you,” that I knew was coming.

The critical look remained on her face & there was a long pause, “My client would like to go ahead with you as their choice.” Her face softened, “I would like to make you the formal offer of the position if you are still interested.” A small smile crept across her red lips.

I sighed & said, “Yes!”, louder than I had meant to. Emiline’s smile grew wider as she extended her hand to me across her desk, “Congratulations, Madeline, I know you’ll do well.” 

I eagerly shook her hand & thanked her sincerely. My head was spinning. A new apartment & a new job, in a new city. My fresh start had officially started. I was beginning to feel happy again.

“So…”, she set down my file, “Would you like to know who you will be catering to hand & foot, so to speak?”

I couldn’t help but smile, I’d been so curious, “Yes, please, I can’t wait to find out!” I couldn’t hide the excitement in my voice.

“Are you familiar with Chris Pohl, the Goth musician?”


	2. Stepping Into Wonderland

Her words echoed inside my head & I had no idea why I repeated his name since I definitely knew who he was, “Chris Pohl?”

“Yes, from the band Blutengel. He’s very famous here in Germany & throughout Europe. You’ve heard of him, yes?”

“Yes, yes I’m familiar with him, he has lots of American fans, too.” My mouth was dry as the desert & my chest felt tight. Yes, I was familiar with Chris Pohl, as a fan. I knew him only through the photos I’d seen of him on internet fan sites & his music videos, & of course his wonderful music. I’d never met him in person or even been to any of his concerts. But, now… Now I was going be his new personal assistant, & my heart started to race nervously. Yes, there was the “star struck” factor, but I knew that would eventually subside as I became more comfortable & familiar with him. That’s how it was with my previous celebrity employers, the tv actor, & with the client before him, a famous chef who had relocated to L.A.. I knew the relationship pattern. First, for me, nervous & star struck, then familiarity & trust grow, then a comfortable working relationship. The difference with then & now was that, even though I was initially wowed by my previous employers celebrity status, I was never physically attracted to them, even though both were very handsome men. With Chris it was different, aside from the famous person & talented musician “wow” factor, I was also physically attracted to him. Very physically attracted. Not only did I find him incredibly handsome on the outside but I was also very much attracted to his personality. I also thought he was extremely sexy &, at times, painfully adorable, too. As most women know, an attractive man is not necessarily a sexy man. Sexiness is that indefinable something that a man either has or he doesn’t, regardless of how he looks. It’s the way he carries himself, conducts himself. It’s the expression on his face, the look in his eyes, his mannerisms. It’s the sound of his voice, the tone, the way he speaks, & maybe most important of all, his level of self confidence & how comfortable he is in his own skin. Chris had these in spades & then some. All of these feelings I had would, of course, be kept hidden from him. Besides, he was already taken anyway. He was with Viki & they seemed very happy. In his eyes, I was simply going to be an employee & nothing more, & I really was grateful for this job. It was the key to my new start, my new life here in Berlin, & I was determined to be happy again.

A loud clap of thunder brought me out of my reverie. I looked at my watch, it was already 4 pm & I hadn’t even unpacked my suitcases yet. I was supposed to meet Chris at his studio tomorrow at 10 am. Meet Chris. I began to feel nervous again. I tried to push him out of my head as I got up & took my luggage into the cozy bedroom. By 10 pm I was ready for bed, everything was unpacked & put in it’s place, I had a little dinner & a relaxing bubble bath & I was setting my alarm for 7 am. I climbed into bed, turned off the little lamp on the nightstand & sighed. I closed my eyes & said a silent prayer to the universe, “Please let tomorrow go well, please let it be a good day, please. Thank you.” 

9:55 am. I stood in front of the door to the building where Chris’ studio was located. It was a cold & cloudy day & rain was expected on & off all day, but for the moment the sky was dry. I took a deep breath & before I could exhale the door opened & a young looking man stood there smiling, “Madeline?”

I quickly exhaled & smiled back, “Yes, I’m Chris’ new personal assistant.” The words felt weird coming out of my mouth. Was this actually happening? Or was I about to wake up in my bed back in L.A. & all of this just an elaborate dream brought on by a broken heart.

“Yes, he’s expecting you, please come in.” His tone was cheerful & he held the door for me as I stepped inside. I felt like Alice stepping into Wonderland. My heart began to race again.

“I’m Mario, Chris’ producer, nice to meet you.” He shook my hand. I tried hard to focus on his words all the while trying to keep a pleasant & calm expression on my face. All of this felt unreal.

“Nice to meet you, too.” My own voice sounded alien to me.

“Come,” he gave me a quick little nod to his left, “I’ll take you to Chris.” Mario’s smile was warm & friendly. I had a huge lump in my throat & swallowed hard but maintained my calm facade as I followed him. My legs felt like they were made of lead.

As we approached a half closed door I heard a man grunt from inside the room. My stomach knotted up. Mario knocked on the door twice in rapid succession & called out Chris’ name but didn’t wait for a response as he slowly pushed the door fully open.


	3. The Man In Black

“Immer die gleiche Scheisse Kable (Always the same shitty cable).” The voice was slightly muffled but also familiar.

I looked into the well lit room towards the far wall & saw only one person, a large figure dressed in black, down on their hands & knees under a table. The figure seemed to be fiddling with something against the wall.

Mario tried again, “Chris, Sie haben einen Besucher (Chris, you have a visitor).” 

“Einen Moment, bitteeeee (One moment, pleeeeease).” 

I couldn’t help but smile at the sound of the word “bitteeeee” being dragged out.

Mario gave me a playful smirk & motioned with his hand for me to go ahead & enter the studio. I walked in & felt my pulse speed up even more as I recognized certain angles of the studio from photos & videos that Chris had posted online. I heard what sounded like the tearing of heavy tape. A moment later the dark figure backed out slowly from under the table, straightened up, but remained kneeling.

“Puhhhhh…” It was more a puff of air than a word, & there, kneeling a few feet in front of me was my new employer, Chris Pohl. 

A couple of thick strands of black hair fell across his right eye & a fresh unlit cigarette dangled off the corner of his mouth. He held a roll of duct tape in his right hand as he smoothed back the wayward pieces of hair with his left. My heart pounded & I was positive that this was a dream & that I was going to wake up in just a second.

Chris set the tape down on the table as he rose to his feet. I knew he was tall, 6’5”-ish, but to see him in person made me realize just how tall 6’5”-ish was. Wow, he was big. Yes, he was a bit on the slender side as compared to maybe a couple of years ago, but he was still a big guy. 

He pulled the unlit cigarette from his lips & set it down next to the duct tape. He was dressed in black pants, a black zip-up hoodie & a black t-shirt with a logo that was half hidden by the partially zipped hoodie. He also had on those black & white sneakers I’d seen him wear in photos & videos he’d taken in this studio. The sides of his hair had grown in again as it usually did when he wasn’t touring or playing a concert, & a light beard graced his handsome face. It was as if all the photos I’d seen of him just suddenly came to life in front of me. He dusted his hands off on his pants, straightened up & stepped towards us.

“Hi, I’m Chris.” His smile was warm as he extended his hand towards me.

I gave him a friendly smile as I slipped my hand into his, “Hi, I’m Madeline, but everybody just calls me Maddy.” 

His large hand enveloped mine the way a baseball mit envelopes a baseball. His warm grip was firm but gentle & you could feel the hidden strength in his hand. His skin, though, was soft, almost silky. 

“Nice to finally meet you, Maddy.” His bright eyes looked into mine.

“Nice to meet you too, Chris.” My heart fluttered as I looked up at him. It felt like everything was moving in slow motion.

“I apologize for being in such a rude position,” he nodded back towards the table he had just been under. “Not the way to make a good first impression on a young lady,” he gave a small sheepish smile. I was trying hard not to melt. The sound of his voice combined with his sexy accent, those big blue eyes & that adorable little embarrassed smile was making my knees week. “Keep it together, Maddy,” I thought. Yes, this was going to have to be my daily silent mantra until I got used to being in his presence.

“Oh, no need to apologize, really.” Again, trying hard to sound calm, cool & collected.

“I leave you in capable hands then, Madeline.”

The sudden sound of Mario’s cheerful voice snapped me back to the fact that there were still three of us in the room. I turned towards the upbeat producer, “Maddy, please.” 

Mario gave me a quick smile, “Maddy.” He then looked at Chris & motioned towards the door behind us with his thumb, “If you two are good then I’m going to go take care of a few things, ok?”

Chris walked over to a stack of small sealed cardboard boxes, picked up two of them & held them out to Mario, “Since you’re going out anyway.” His voice was quietly playful.

The producer took the boxes & sighed at me but spoke to Chris as he turned & headed out the studio door, “I’m off, then.”

“Danke, Mario (Thank you, Mario).” That soft playful tone again.

“Ja, ja (Yes, yes)…” Mario’s voice trailed off.

I turned back towards Chris & the realization that I was alone in the room with him made the butterflies in my stomach zoom around again.


	4. Coffee & Ghosts

“So, Maddy…” Chris slowly rubbed his palms together & then motioned towards a couch by the wall, “Please, sit down, make yourself comfortable.” His smile was sweet, “I can take your coat, if you like?”

I slipped off the messenger bag from my shoulder & Chris immediately held out his hand to me, “Let me take that for you.” 

I handed him the bag, “Thanks,” & then my coat.

“Please…” He motioned once more towards the couch & gave a little nod.

I sat down as he hung up my things on a large coat rack. He turned back to face me, “Would you like some coffee? It’s fresh.” That sweet little smile again. 

“Um yes, please, thank you.” All I could think of was “Kaffeemaschine”, Chris’ beloved coffee maker, & my tiny little inner fangirl let out a tiny little inner squeal, but I, of course, maintained my calm composure.

As he poured two cups of coffee a low rumble of thunder rolled slowly overhead & I could hear it start to rain again. A moment later the sky opened up & it began to come down in buckets. Chris carefully set down the two filled mugs on the table in front of us & then brought over a container of creamer, a small basket filled with sugar packets, a couple of teaspoons & a few paper napkins. I was trying hard not to smile too broadly as I watched my Goth employer set everything out. The last thing he set down was a plate full of cookies, all different shapes & sizes, & they smelled good. He rolled a black office chair over next to the coffee table & sat down to my right. 

“The cookies are fresh, too, I picked them up at a local bakery this morning. Please, help yourself.” His voice was calm & soothing & that helped the hyper butterflies in my stomach to settle down a bit. 

As I prepared my coffee, he stacked two cookies together like poker chips, set them down on one of the paper napkins & then placed the napkin on his lap as he settled back into the chair, crossing one long leg over the other at the knees. He held the hot coffee mug by the handle & slowly took a small sip.

“Aaaaahhh,” he blinked slowly, looking over at me, “I think I got it right today.” He took another careful sip as I took my first, & he was right, it was very good. 

As we had our coffee & cookies, he spent the next little while engaging me in pleasant conversation about the weather, the rain, the traffic, safe & easy topics to help me relax & feel more comfortable. It worked, & soon the majority of the butterflies had flown away & my tiny little inner fangirl had hitched a ride along with them. I was still most definitely star struck, but that uncomfortable intense giddy feeling had subsided, & I was grateful to him. 

“Thanks, “ I said quietly.

He leaned forward & set his almost empty second cup of coffee down on the low table. He settled back into his chair, this time crossing his legs in the other direction. He ran his right hand slowly back through his hair & gave me a relaxed, friendly, acknowledging look. 

“Can I ask you a personal question?” His tone was low & gentle. He leaned forward again & opened a small wooden box that contained two cigarette packs, several matchbooks & a couple of Zippo-style lighters. Removing one cigarette, he slipped the tip of it between his lips, closed the box & leaned back in his chair. He reached into his right pants pocket & pulled out his personal lighter.

I picked up another cookie, more to keep my hands busy than to eat it, “Yeah, sure.”

He pulled the unlit cigarette out of his mouth, “Your file said you’re ok being around smoking?”

I nodded, “Yeah, I don’t mind.” I smiled, “Was that the personal question?”

His blue eyes flashed at me as he put the cigarette between his lips again & lit it. He took a long drag and turned his head a little away from me as he exhaled slowly, keeping his eyes on me. He returned the lighter to his pocket & responded to my question with a small shake of his head.

“Why did you leave L.A.?” That same low, gentle tone. “In your file you say you wanted a new start. To me that implies there was an old ending.” He narrowed his eyes slightly, keeping them locked on me, as he took another long drag followed by another slow exhale off to the side. 

I broke off a small piece of the cookie I held as I waited for the usual & customary “but you don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to, I’ll understand.” All I heard instead was just the deep slow roll of thunder, & in a strange way, I respected the fact that he didn’t let me off easy.

“My fiance & I broke up,” I gave him a weak smile. “After that there were just too many places… Too many memories.”

He reached down & picked up a small glass ashtray & set it down on his thigh. He tapped his cigarette into it & then lifted his eyes to meet mine again.

“Too many ghosts.” His voice was quiet as he took another slow drag.

I nodded slowly, “Too many ghosts.” Thunder rumbled again across the dark skies outside.

“Was it a mutual breakup?” 

I paused for a moment & looked down at the cookie that I was gradually taking apart crumb by crumb, “He was cheating on me.”

“I’m so sorry to hear that, Maddy, really.”

I looked back at him with the same weak smile, “Thanks,” my voice barely audible.

His face showed genuine concern & compassion & his smile was gentle, “And now you’re here, to start over. A new beginning.”

“Yes, exactly.”

“Maddy 2.0, the advanced edition.” 

I let out a small laugh, “I like that.”

Chris took one last puff off his cigarette before extinguishing it in the ashtray, “Berlin has enough ghosts of its’ own,” he set the ashtray down on the table & rested his elbows on his knees, leaning a little towards me. He spoke softly as if telling me a secret, “Leave yours back in the past, with your old life, & your heart will beat again, I promise.”

I looked into his eyes & I could see he was being sincere, “Thank you.”

He gave a little nod & sat back up, “And now that I’ve forced you to talk about something painful & completely depressed you…”

My smile grew wider, “No, it’s ok.”

“And on your first day!” His voice brightened up as he patted himself on the shoulder & narrowed his eyes until they were almost shut, “Good job, Chris, good job.”

I couldn’t help but laugh, “No really, it’s ok, I’m fine.”

He chuckled & shook his head. He stood up, put his hands on his hips & let out a loud sigh. He looked down at me & gave a wide friendly smirk, “What do you say we get out of here for a while & get some fresh air?”

I nodded, “Sounds good.”

He stretched his arms & rubbed the back of his head, “I’ll give you a little tour of the area around here so you can kind of see where things are & then I have to make a couple of stops. But after that we can go get something to eat if that works for you?”

“That works for me.” I gave him a thumbs up.

He grinned & returned the thumbs up, “Sehr gut (Very good).”

We put on our coats & I grabbed my bag. He took one of the cigarette packs out of the small wooden box on the coffee table. He slipped one cigarette between his lips but didn’t light it, & put the pack in his coat pocket. He locked up the studio & we headed out a rear security door. The rain had stopped but the sky still looked dark & angry. As he guided me towards his car he reached into the pocket of his coat, pulled out his car keys & tossed them to me.

He spoke around the unlit cigarette that dangled from his lips, “You drive.”


	5. Fluid & Effortless, Maddening & Intoxicating

His key toss took me by surprise & I was barely able to catch them with both hands. As we approached his car both of us headed towards the passenger side staring at each other, him down at me, me up at him. We looked like a bad comedy team. He let out a quiet laugh & lit his cigarette.

“Ah ah ah…” He motioned to the driver’s side with his long index finger, “Andere Seite, bitte (Other side, please).”

“I thought you were joking.”

“I never joke about my car.” He raised one eyebrow in a mock menacing way. Holding the cigarette between his teeth, he reached back & pulled the hood of his jacket up from inside his heavy outer coat & placed it over his head.

I pressed the button to unlock the doors & walked over to the driver’s side. We both got in & I placed my bag on the back seat. His car was as beautiful on the inside as it was on the outside & since it had power everything it was very easy to adjust the seat & mirrors. As I eased his car onto the street he told me in which direction to go. He lowered his window about a quarter of the way & exhaled his smoke out into the gloomy day as we drove.

“I wanted you to drive because I want to see with my own eyes that you’re comfortable driving here, that you understand the traffic signs & that you know the basic traffic rules. I’ll sleep better that way,” his voice was low & he gave me a shy little smile.

I returned his smile, “I kind of figured that. You want proof.”

He pursed his lips a little & looked out the windshield, “Ja (Yes), I just want to know that you’re going to be safe driving around out here with all these verrückt (crazy) people, that’s all.”

“I appreciate your concern. I mean that.”

He gave that same shy smile & I felt my heart flutter. That was one of the truly unique qualities he had that made me, & countless other women, so incredibly attracted to him, that super sexy/ultra confident yet slightly shy combination that was as natural to him as breathing. It wasn’t just only in his smile, you could also see it in his eyes. He could shift from one state of being to the other fluidly, effortlessly. It was both maddening & intoxicating.

After showing me a few places around the neighborhood, our first stop was at his auto dealership where they adjusted the sensitivity level of his car alarm. As we waited in the plush “guest lounge” he explained that our next stop would be a vape shop to pick up a new device since his had stopped working last night. That answered my question as to why he was smoking cigarettes again. 

After the vape shop, he had me drive to a favorite little mom & pop restaurant of his. He ordered for both of us & when the food arrived we immediately dove right in. It was almost 2pm & we were both hungry. Each of us only had a few of the wonderful cookies he brought & we both admitted that neither of us had any breakfast. While we ate, our conversation was relaxed & fun & I was feeling more at ease in his presence. 

He took another sip of the beer he had ordered with his lunch & took a quick look at his watch, “Almost 3:30.”

That surprised me that an hour & a half had gone by since we sat down, “Wow, it doesn’t seem like we’ve been here that long.”

He nodded as he motioned his hand over his empty plate & then towards me, “Good food, good conversation always makes the time go fast. Sometimes too fast.” His smile, voice & mood were relaxed. 

He swirled the remaining beer around in its' bottle as the waitress set down the bill. He gave her a quick, friendly look, “Danke (Thank you).”

I pulled my wallet from the messenger bag that doubled as my purse & as I snapped it open his large, well manicured hand suddenly appeared & covered up my wallet. I looked up & he tilted his head slightly to the side, giving me a playful scolding look.

I sighed, “Ok, but my treat next time.”

He straightened back up, keeping his bright eyes on me & keeping the playful look on his face but he didn’t say anything. He turned & walked up to the cashier & I put my wallet away. I watched him as he stood there & paid the bill, chatting easily with a couple of the employees. When they asked for his autograph his smile was both gracious & a bit shy as he signed. As they each took turns posing in a picture with him his expression shifted from slightly bashful to elegant & delicately sexy. Fluid & effortless. Maddening & intoxicating. 

He returned to the table & sat back down. He lifted his beer & finished the last few sips. His blue eyes scanned my face as he raised both eyebrows, “We should get going, I still need to give you a few things before you leave today.”

As we slowly walked back to his car he told me about a few of his other favorite places in the area & gave me some pointers on what streets were less congested with traffic than others & which ones to avoid altogether. It was nice to walk with him like this, just talking about everyday things. It helped me to see him not just as “Chris Pohl”, but as just Chris, & “just Chris” was a really sweet guy.

I drove us back to the studio under dry skies & parked his car back in the same spot that we left from. I turned off the ignition & sighed. I felt like I had just successfully landed the space shuttle.

“So… Will you sleep better now?” I smiled widely & proudly. 

He unfastened his seat belt & gave me a sarcastic look that said “smart ass” but I could see the humor his eyes, “Yes… I will sleep better now, thank you.” 

I kept the same wide smile on my face & annoying chipper tone in my voice as I handed him back his car keys, “You’re welcome.”

He let out a laugh & got out of the car. Once we got settled back in the studio he brought out a large shopping bag. I was seated again on the couch & he sat back in the same rolling office chair that was still next to the coffee table. 

Reaching into the bag, he pulled out a new, top of the line notebook computer & cell phone, both still in their factory boxes. 

He handed them to me, “These are yours to keep. Take them home tonight & play with them but please bring them in tomorrow so I can download some information into them,” that sweet expression.

My eyes grew big as I eyed the gifts, “Oh, wow… Thanks! But you didn’t have to… I already have a laptop & ….”

He blinked slowly & kept the sweet expression on his face, “I know… But you’re going to be getting a lot of stuff sent to you & I don’t want to overwhelm the devices you already have. Plus, if you want, it will be easier to keep your business & personal stuff separate.”

Before I could say another word, he continued. “Aaaaand…,” he reached into the bag & removed an envelope. He pulled out a credit card from it & held it out to me, “A business card for anything you need to buy for the studio or, maybe, to help make your job easier, any supplies you need.”

“Thank you.”

“Aaaaand…” He reached in a third time.

I let out a laugh, “More?”

“Ohhhhh, ja (yes).”

This time he removed a smaller envelope & handed it to me. I peeked inside.

“Your keys to the studio & the building. They’re color coded & I put a note in there as to which keys go with what. The security & fire alarm codes are also in there, I’ll show you tomorrow how to use those. Aaaaand...just...one...more.”

He carefully pulled out a pretty gift bag & held it out to me, “From me & Ulli, something to say, “Welcome”.” 

I moved the other items he had just given me off my lap & set them down on the coffee table. I took the gift bag from him & couldn’t help but grin. Looking inside, I saw lots of colorful little things.

“It’s nothing too exciting, just a little something.”

I looked at him & reached inside. I pulled out one black coffee mug & then another. Each one contained a cellophane bag filled with colorfully wrapped individual chocolates & hard candies, & each bag was tied off with a little black bow. Each mug also had my name diagonally printed across it, “Madeline”. This gift made me smile bigger than the expensive electronics.

“That’s so sweet, thank you!”

His smile was also sweet, “You’re welcome, Maddy. Look at the other side.”

I turned the mugs around. One of them said, “I Moved To Berlin For This??” & the other, “Tell Chris, NO!” 

I couldn’t help but laugh, “That’s really cute, I love them!”

“Ulli likes to do these little gift bags.”

“When I have a chance to meet her I’ll be sure to thank her.”

“She’ll be back the day after tomorrow. She’s looking forward to meeting you.”

“I look forward to meeting her, too.”

He rubbed his beard & smoothed back his hair, “And I think we are done for today.” His voice was upbeat but I could see the tiredness in his eyes. 

We both got up & he put all of my new things back into the shopping bag. He walked me out to my car which was parked in front of the building. He set the bag on the back seat, & after I got in he gently shut the driver’s door. I started up the car & lowered my window as it began to rain again. 

Chris bent down & pulled out his cell phone, “What’s your number?”

As I read it off to him he typed it into his phone & then he called my number. I looked at my phone when I heard it jingle & saw his private number appear.

He squinted his eyes a bit as it began to rain a little harder, “Do me a favor, please? Call me when you get home so I know you got there safe? You know, the rain, new city & all.”

“Ok, I will. Thank you again for everything.”

“You’re very welcome. See you tomorrow same time, about 10am? Ok? And park in the back where my car is.”

“Yes, ok.”

He smiled warmly, tapped my door twice with his hand & gave me a wink, “Ciao.”

“Ciao.” 

Chris straightened back up & shoved both of his hands into the pockets of his coat. I raised my window as it began to rain harder & glanced at him in my side mirror. He stood there for a moment then took a couple of slow steps backwards before turning around & finally heading back inside.

The drive home was slow because of the rain, which was now heavy, & also because I hit rush hour traffic. When I arrived at my building I couldn’t find parking close to the entrance, & even with my umbrella I was more than damp by the time I got inside. Once I got into my apartment, I set my things down & called Chris.

“Madeline… I take it you’re home.”

Even though we’d spent the entire day talking, hearing the sound of his low soft voice & charming accent over the phone made me smile again.

“Yup, I made it.”

“Good. It’s raining heavy now. Did you make it into your building dry?”

I could hear the rustling of paper in the background of his phone.

“Mostly, yes,” I chuckled.

“So you did get wet.”

“A little, yeah.”

“Hmmmmm…,” he dragged out an exaggerated curious sound, which to my ears sounded sexy.

In the background I heard papers being shuffled & then a drawer close.

“Ja, that will happen now that you’re in Berlin, Maddy...you will get wet from time to time. Sometimes just a little bit, like today, & other times you will be dripping. It depends, you know?”

His tone was pure innocent helpfulness...sort of. I heard another drawer gently close.

“Yeah, I’ll have to keep that in mind.”

“Perfect. So, I will say “Goodnight” to you here then & let you enjoy your evening.”

“Are you still at the studio?”

“Ja (yes), I am, but I’m leaving in just a few minutes.”

“Ok, you have a nice evening, too, Chris.”

“You too, thank you Maddy, goodnight.” His tone had returned to that sweet softness.

“Goodnight, Chris.” 

Later that night as I lay in bed, feeling that heavy drowsiness begin to envelope me, I couldn’t stop thinking about what he said, “...you will get wet from time to time, sometimes just a little bit & other times you will be dripping.” And as sleep finally pulled me down into its’ velvet embrace, all I could think was, “Oh, shit…”


	6. The Very Bad Man

The next morning, I arrived at the studio around 9:45 & managed to figure out how to use the pass code to enter the building through the rear security door. I parked in back as Chris had instructed, & although there were a few other cars there, I didn’t see his anywhere, but then again I was a bit early. Once inside the building it was just a short walk to his studio, & as I approached the door I noticed it was cracked open a few inches & the lights were on. As I got closer I could hear voices & occasional relaxed laughter. The voices sounded male & they were speaking a mix of German & English, & then I heard my name.

“Maddy?” It was an unfamiliar voice.

“Ja, Maddy, ihr Spitzname für Madeline (Yes, Maddy, her nickname for Madeline).” That voice I recognized, it was Chris.

“Is she pretty?” The same unfamiliar male voice.

I normally don’t eavesdrop on conversations but…

“Why does that matter?”

“Es spielt keine Rolle (It doesn’t matter), I’m just curious. Nice tits? Nice ass?”

Chris laughed softly, “Hey, she’s going to be here soon so get your mind out of the gutter.”

“My mind likes being in the gutter, & so does yours.”

I heard a cell phone ring & Chris answered it. He spoke German to the caller & his voice sounded irritated. When the call ended he sighed loudly. 

“Schlecht (Bad)?"

“Sie müssen einen speziellen Teil bestellen (They have to order a special part) for the fucking car alarm & it will be ready tomorrow. They just adjusted it yesterday when I was there with Maddy, und heute morgen wieder (and again this morning) WOOP WOOP WOOP WOOP for no reason.” Chris let out a quiet growl. 

I stifled a laugh as he imitated the sound of the alarm & his growl was cute, too.

“Always something when it comes to cars.”

“Immer etwas (Always something).” Chris sighed.

I knocked on the door a couple of times before I pushed it open, “Guten Morgen.” My tone was cheerful.

“Ah! Guten Morgen.” Chris was seated in the center of the room in his rolling office chair, one leg crossed over the other. He was dressed similar to yesterday except today he wore a heavier turtleneck sweater, black of course. His demeanor & tone of voice were both relaxed & pleasant &, as always, there was that soft smile, & those seductive blue eyes. 

On my right there was another man, similar in height to Chris, leaning back against a table with his arms folded across his chest & his legs crossed at the ankles. He had on black pants with several zippered pockets on the sides, a black sweater, a dark green knee length raincoat & heavy black combat boots that laced up to his calf. He also had on a plain black baseball cap that was pulled down low over his brow, but I still knew who it was.

“Maddy, I’d like you to meet a very good friend of mine, Gordon. Gordon, this is Madeline, my new assistant.” 

I gave him a friendly smile & extended my hand. Gordon slowly uncrossed his arms & ankles & bent down towards me as if to play up the fact that I was noticeably shorter than he was. He pushed up the brim of his baseball cap with his index finger & enveloped my hand in his, the same way Chris’ hand had done. 

“Hi, nice to meet you, Gordon, please feel free to call me Maddy.”

His blue eyes twinkled mischievously but his mouth formed a frown that made me want to giggle because at that moment he looked like Grumpy Cat.

“Hallo, nice to meet you too, Maddy Madeline.” He shook my hand slowly & spoke slowly in a low gravely voice, keeping his teasing eyes locked on mine, “There’s something you should know about me, Maddy Madeline…” He released his gentle grip & rested both of his palms on his knees as he remained in his stooped over position, “I am a VERY. BAD. MAN.” He annunciated those last three words with deadly precision but without raising his voice. 

Chris let out a sudden snort & Gordon & I both looked at him. Chris ran his fingers through his dark hair & shook his head, trying to keep a serious look on his face, “Entschuldigen Sie, bitte (Excuse me, please).”

Gordon turned back to face me, Grumpy Cat expression back in place, “Ja (Yes), so…” He cleared his throat, speaking again in that ominous gravely tone, “As I said, I am a VERY. BAD. MAN.” 

“Why are you a very bad man?” I couldn’t help but smile.

Chris shifted in his chair, propping his elbow on the armrest & resting his bearded chin on his closed fist. He stared at his friend, his eyes wide with playful anticipation for Gordon’s response.

The grumpy man narrowed his eyes at me & continued in that slow menacing manner, “Because I corrupt the innocent…& eat their SOULS.” Again, that deadly quiet precision on the last word.

Chris let out a pained groan & dropped his chin off his fist, hanging his head. His voice was muffled as he spoke to himself, “Sie wird denken, dass wir alle verrückt sind (She's going to think we’re all crazy).”

I let out a laugh.

Gordon straightened back up & looked at his suffering friend, & with the additional height added by the thick soles of his boots he looked like he was seven feet tall, “What...” It was more of a statement than an actual question & the low ominous tone of his voice was replaced by an almost a whiney one. 

Chris lifted his head & leaned back in his chair again. He gave Gordon a wide crooked smirk but remained silent.

Gordon stared back & repeated himself, “What… I do corrupt the innocent & eat their souls.”

Chris kept his smirk & gaze locked on his friend & still said nothing.

The human Grumpy Cat looked at me & huffed. All I could do was smile. I was enjoying this. 

Gordon looked back over at Chris & gave a single quick nod in his direction, “I corrupted YOU.”

Chris’ bright eyes remained glued to the very bad man, “But I was never innocent.” His voice was quiet but playful. He clasped the fingers of his hands together & stretched both long arms up over his head as he glanced lazily up at the ceiling. His smirk turned into a “this stretch feels really good” wide smile & he let out a very soft low, “Mmmmm…” 

It was still too early in the day for him to sound that sexy, or so I would have to keep telling myself. After holding his cat-like stretch for a moment, he slowly lowered his arms, keeping his long slender fingers interlaced & resting his hands on his belly. He tilted his head a little to one side while resting his gaze once again on Gordon, & then after a pause, he shifted his eyes to me & carefully raised one very well defined eyebrow, “And he never ate my soul.” That same quiet voice. 

My smile grew wider & Chris mirrored my smile back to me. I couldn’t stop looking into his beautiful blue eyes. It’s almost as if he had a permanent case of bedroom-eyes. Most of the time his eyes just naturally happened to look like he was either thinking of sex or he just finished having it. And there was no way in hell I was ever going to tell him that.

“You’re no fun today.” Gordon’s sudden statement made me catch my breath but Chris kept silently staring at me. He had a unique way of doing this that made it seem...not like he was looking through me, which is the way most people would come across, but rather, that he was looking into me, deep inside of me. It was slightly unnerving, but to be honest, it was also arousing. And there was no way in hell I was ever going to tell him that either.

“I’m leaving.” 

Chris held my gaze for a moment longer & then without turning his head he shifted his eyes to Gordon, “You’re leaving?” His voice was soft & slightly thick.

“That’s what I just said.” Gordon snorted at his friend & snapped up his raincoat. A steady drizzle had begun to fall again. He pulled his car keys from his pocket & looked back at me, he fingered the brim of his baseball cap in a courteous farewell manner & extended his large hand to me once more. I gave him a warm smile as he gently shook my hand.

“It was very nice meeting you, Maddy Madeline.” Grumpy Cat vanished & he gave me a small, but genuinely friendly smile.

“Very nice meeting you, too, Gordon.”

The very bad man turned his attention back to Chris & pointed his long index finger at him in an accusing fashion, “As for you…” 

Chris pursed his lips trying not to smile too big as he watched his former bandmate.

“I’ll see you later. 7pm, yes?”

Chris closed his eyes, gave a slow nod & reopened his eyes, “Yes.”

“Good.” Gordon turned & headed out the studio door giving me a quick wave of his hand.

I returned the friendly gesture.

Chris stood up, ran his hand through his hair & called out to Gordon, “Hey, I’ll walk out with you.” He pulled a knee length black leather coat off the coat rack & slipped it on.

“Maddy, I’ll be back in a few minutes,” His voice was once again upbeat & he motioned towards the coffee maker, “It’s fresh, if you’re interested.” His smile the soft sweet one he usually wore.

“Ok, thanks.”

He turned & grabbed a black umbrella that was propped up in the corner & followed his friend out the studio. I set down my messenger bag & a small plastic bag that held the coffee mugs he’d given me yesterday, I would use these as my “office” cups. 

As I carefully poured some piping hot coffee into the mug that said “I Moved To Berlin For This??”, I couldn’t stop thinking of my handsome Goth employer. I was going to have to get this attraction I had to him in check. My heart still ached occasionally for my previous broken relationship & I was positive I was in full blown rebound mode. And as every woman knows, rebound mode is when you make bad decisions & stupid mistakes when it comes to love. Your heart is still hurting, you’re still somewhat confused about the previous break up, you want to be left alone & yet at the same time you want to be held. You constantly fluctuate between being lonely, angry, sad, horny, happy, & name any other emotion. I slowly poured in the creamer & as it swirled in thick pale lines through the dark hot liquid I kept wondering what Chris’ face looks like when he cums. Damn it! I set down the creamer & sighed. Ok...ok… Chris said Ulli returns tomorrow so I’m sure that’s when he’ll need me to take care of things while they work on their music. So tomorrow I should be busy & probably working mostly on my own while they work together. Good, yes. That will be good for me. 

I added some sugar to my coffee & sat down on the couch as I stirred it in. After a few sips I put my mug aside & pulled out from my bag the new notebook computer & cell phone Chris had given me yesterday. He said he was going to load some information into them & I was curious as to what it would be. Probably mostly contact information I assumed. I picked up my coffee & took another sip. It was just as good today as yesterday. I had to admit, he really knew his way around the Kaffeemaschine. 

Chris walked back into the studio as I was mid-sip & I noticed his hair & face were soaked. I swallowed quickly & set down my mug.

“What happened?”

He smiled broadly, so obviously he wasn’t too upset. He held up the umbrella, “When this doesn’t want to open as you’re coming back inside AND it starts to rain hard, very fast, AND you start to run but the rain is faster than your legs.”

“Oh, no, you poor thing.” I couldn’t help but chuckle.

He placed the malfunctioning device in a trash can & sighed. He pulled off his wet leather coat & hung it back up. He picked up a small towel that lay next to the coffee maker & plopped down in his office chair, giving me an exasperated smile.

“Don’t feel too bad for me. I’m tough. I’ll survive.” His tone was playful.

He tossed back his wet hair with a quick snap of his head & wiped his face with the towel. As I watched him, I began to wonder what he looked like in a hot steamy shower. Damn it! Hurry back, Ulli, please hurry back.


	7. Marry Me

Chris rubbed the towel back & forth a few times through his wet hair & then tossed it onto the coffee table in front of him. The longer hair that ran down the center of his head, & created his familiar combed back mohawk, stood out messily in all directions. I eyed his wild hair with an amused look.

“Is this the picture I should post on the Blutengel page? A good look for me?”

I laughed & nodded, “I can just see all the comments now.”

Chris chuckled softly, “Right?” He rubbed his beard, “They already don’t like mein Bart (my beard), they’re really not going to like this,” he quickly ran one hand through his messy hair a couple of times, smoothing it back into place. 

He stood up & pulled off his damp turtleneck sweater. Underneath he wore a short sleeve black t-shirt with the logo of a half naked woman on it. His silver bracelets clinked quietly as he shook out the sweater & walked it over to another chair, draping it over the back to dry. I stared at his infamous “sleeve” & it looked even cooler in person. He removed a plain black hoodie from the coat rack, slipped it on & zipped it half way up. He smoothed back his better controlled hair once more & then gently clapped his hands together, giving me a warm smile.

“What do you say we get started on loading your computer & phone with a lot of boring stuff?”

“I’m ready, boss.” 

Chris let out a laugh & pointed his index finger at me, “Boss. I like that!” 

I laughed also as I stood & picked up the new devices. He rolled his chair over to a table that held a couple of laptops, a keyboard, headphones, & several other items. He moved things from this table to another table & that’s when it hit me just how much stuff was just everywhere I looked. The studio wasn’t dirty at all, just...full. Every table held a mix of recording equipment, small electronics, computers, notepads, band merchandise, promotional items, pens, markers, Post-It notes with cryptic messages scribbled on them & all types of personal items, from gum & mints to eye drops & a furniture catalog. 

As Chris made some space on the table for us, he gave me a quick bashful glance, “It’s usually not this bad with so much stuff…,” he gathered up a few more items & cradled them in his arms as he motioned with his elbow towards a chair. “Please, sit, get comfortable.”

I rolled the chair up to the table, set my things down & then sat myself down. When he finished relocating some of his things, he sat down next to me.

“Sorry about that, I should have been better prepared.” His gentle shyness evident in his sweet smile.

“Don’t even worry about it,” my smile reassuring.

He pursed his lips ever so slightly as his clear blue eyes scanned my face. Sitting this close next to him made my heart speed up but you wouldn’t know it to look at me. Cool, calm & collected once again. 

We chatted comfortably for the next while as he went about setting up my new computer & phone, which he had already pre-activated, showing me various folders & files he had downloaded & what they were used for. He also went over all the various things I would be in charge of from now on & gave me some pointers on how to deal with his business contacts. He downloaded his own personal schedule & appointments & also the band’s schedule, including upcoming appearances, interviews, shows, video shoot dates for their new album & even the early framework for their new big tour next year. Chris also gave me the personal contact information for all the dancers, stage performers, additional musicians & behind-the-scenes people they would be working & touring with. I had the entire Blutengel kingdom at my fingertips & it was both overwhelming & breathtaking.

Chris clicked a couple of keys on his laptop & then leaned back in his chair, “Just one more thing to give you & then we can go to lunch if you’re hungry?”

“Sounds good. I could definitely eat something.”

He smiled broadly & patted his belly, “Good. Me, too.”

He clasped his hands behind his head, looked at his computer screen & then back to me, “You’re my first personal assistant, you know.”

Seeing all the stuff, schedules & appointments he had just given me, his admission surprised me, “Really?”

“Oh, ja (yes). Never had one before. Never needed one. I did all of this myself. Ulli und (and) Viki would help when they could, Mario too, & of course Gordon. But they also have their own things they need to take care of, so most of all this…,” he nodded his head towards my computer, “I would handle on my own. Up until, maybe last year, it wasn’t really a problem. I was very busy, yes, but everything still got done on schedule.”

I shifted in my chair, leaned forward a bit to stretch my back & lifted my eyes up to him, “What changed?”

His sparkling eyes gave me a once over & an ever-so-slight lascivious look passed quickly across his attractive face as he looked down into my eyes. After a short pause, he continued.

“Umm…my ambitions got the best of me,” his little embarrassed smile was cute. “I agreed to a couple of side projects thinking “no problem, I can do this too”...”

I interrupted him as I straightened back up in my chair, “Because you’re that good.” I gave him a friendly teasing smile.

He returned the teasing smile & let out that same low soft “Mmmmm” that I thought sounded so sexy earlier today. He gave a slow nod, “Because I’m that good.”

The handsome Goth glanced at his computer screen again & then back to me, “Around the same time I made that bright decision, Ulli also took on an additional project, which I actually encouraged her to do. A couple of months later, a friend of Mario’s wanted him to work on some music for an independent film he was doing & I, again, encouraged Mario to go ahead with it. I don’t regret at all giving Ulli & Mario a little push to do these things. I always believe it’s good to have more than just one interest, it makes you grow & think outside your normal, usual world. And...it also gives you a little mental break from your ordinary routine.” Chris let out a small sigh, “But, with them now busy with other things too, & with us working on this new album, a new tour to organize, new videos to put together & endless other things that come with all that… This is the result…” He extended his long arms & motioned them around the cluttered room, “I’ve already missed a couple of deadlines, luckily they were only for smaller things.” He gave me a serious look, all the soft playfulness & teasing looks gone, “That’s never happened to me before when it comes to my bands, my music. Never. I take great pride in getting things done when I say they will be done & not letting people down who are depending on me & taking my word when I tell them I’m going to do something. As of today, I’m still behind in a couple of areas. And that, Maddy, is where you come in.” His gloomy expression lifted & was replaced with a sweet one.

I mirrored his gentle expression & felt bad for the frustration & disappointment he felt in himself. “Anything you need me to do, Chris, just tell me. However you think I can help, I want to help. It’s what I do. Ulli, too. I can assist both of you in doing a lot of this extra stuff, that way you two can focus on your music. I’m actually used to this, what I call “artistic chaos”. I’ve encountered this with all my previous employers. They’ve all worked in the creative fields, in one way or another. And especially with musicians & songwriters, you can’t schedule when the muse…,” I put air quotes on “muse”, “...will call. She’s either speaking to you or not. She doesn’t accept appointments & she doesn’t wait for you. She makes you wait for her. She can be kind of a bitch.” I smirked.

Chris smiled warmly & the sparkle was back in those beautiful blue eyes, “Marry me.”

I grinned, “Really, just tell me what you need me to do, I’ll make sure it gets done.”

“I need you to marry me.” 

I dropped my head down & laughed. I looked back up at him, “Can we go eat now, please?” 

He continued to look at me with that mischievous gleam for a moment longer & then glanced at his computer screen. He clicked a few keys & then turned his chair to face me, the playful look still on his face. He rose to his feet keeping his eyes locked on mine. Since we had been sitting so close to each other, when he stood up his belt buckle was only inches from my face. I looked at it & then looked up at him but didn’t say anything, & he kept his natural bedroom eyes on my face. The silence between us that filled the room for a moment wasn’t awkward, it was intriguing.

“Let’s go eat,” his voice low.

We left under dark skies but the rain held off. Since his car was at the dealership until tomorrow I drove us to another favorite spot of his for lunch. Once again, the food & conversation were wonderful & time flew by quicker than expected. Since we had a late start with lunch, by the time we returned it was already after 4pm. 

He spent the next little while showing me around the building that housed his studio & also the inside of the studio, which cabinets & drawers held what & where extra office supplies were located. He also showed me how to arm & disarm the fire alarm & security system. Once all the business stuff had been attended to he gave me, what he called, the “fun tour”, showing me the inside of their recording booth & all the various recording & mixing equipment that he & Mario used. He easily answered all my questions & I was amazed at, not only his knowledge of music, but also of the business & technical end of the industry. He wasn’t just “some cute guy in a Goth band”. Chris was so much more, & I quickly realized that all the photos & posts of him I’d been looking at on internet fan sites didn’t even begin to scratch the surface of who he really was. 

As he handed back my computer & phone his mood was upbeat, “Do you like video games, computer games?”

I put the items back into my messenger bag & then sat down on the couch, “Yeah, some of them. I like the racing ones like Mario Kart or, like, adventure ones where you have to go on a quest & find treasure & stuff.”

Chris rolled up his office chair & sat down, “Yeah, me too, I like those. I also like rp games, the ones with big storylines & you can get very detailed with your characters & with your adventures.”

“I like those, too, but I haven’t played anything like that in a long time.”

“Ja (yes), I don’t have time to play everyday but every few days I like to move my character along a little bit, maybe at least to the next tree or rock.”

For some reason the last part of what he said struck me as funny & I started to laugh. He tried not to laugh at first but it finally snuck out. 

“I want to get a few of us together for, like, a video game night kind of thing. You, Ulli, Viki, Gordon, Mario & a couple of other friends of mine. We did it about a year ago & it was a lot of fun. Stupid fun, really, like where you drink, eat, talk & then try & race your little kart. We spent more time drinking, crashing our karts & calling each other bad names than anything else. But we all had a good time, you know? Is that something you, maybe, would be interesting in doing sometime?

“Yeah, that sounds like fun!” My obvious interest getting the better of me.

He grinned, “Great! It probably won’t be for a few weeks but once I get an idea of what day is good for everyone then I’ll let all of you know & see if that works for everybody. Sound good?”

“Sounds awesome!”

“Then, Maddy, we are once again done for the day & you are free to leave my dungeon.” His smile was as upbeat as his voice. 

I gathered up my things & he walked me out to my car. After I got in & shut the door I lowered the window & he bent down to me, resting his right arm on the roof of the car.

“So tomorrow, 10am again?”

I nodded, “Ok.”

“Let’s just say that will be your time from now on, ja (yes)?

“Ja.”

He gave me a big sweet smile, “Ok, then... & Ulli will be back tomorrow also. I think you will really like her.”

“I look forward to meeting her. Are you heading home now too when Gordon picks you up?”

His expression became playfully mischievous again, “Not straight home. We’re going to do a little drinking first & then some bullshitting & then some more drinking & then some trouble making & then home...maybe.” He gave me a wink & tapped the top of the car with the tips of his nails, “Better get going before traffic gets too bad.”

I started up the engine, “Ok, have a good evening, then. Be safe.”

He straightened up & took a step back. He pointed both long index fingers at himself, narrowed his mischievous blue eyes, & silently mouthed the words “always safe”. He took another slow step backwards & raised his hand to me, his voice relaxed, “You have a good evening too, Maddy, tschüss (bye).”

“Tschüss.”

As I drove home, my head was swimming with all the things Chris told me today, but only one thought kept echoing over & over again…”Ulli will be back tomorrow”, & I suddenly felt the butterflies zooming around my stomach again.


	8. Hens & Roosters

The next morning as I pulled into the parking lot behind Chris’ studio, I saw his beautiful car there again. It looked as if he’d just driven it off the showroom lot. Every inch of it absolutely gleamed, bumper to shiny bumper, roof to glistening rims, even his tires looked brand new. I got out of my car, locked the door, & walked over to his. Although his windows were all tinted, the windshield just had a low tint & it wasn’t too difficult to see inside. So, with curiosity getting the best of me, & without actually touching his gorgeous ride, I peeked in through the driver’s side of the windshield. It was just as immaculate on the inside as the outside. The leather seats & accents actually looked glossy. I bent over across the side of the hood a little more & craned my neck so I could see the back seats. They looked as if no one had ever sat in them, even the buckles on each rear seat belt had been meticulously lined up with the one next to it. Wow. As I looked all around the inside, I couldn’t help but smile. The dealership must have thrown in the “platinum” detail job to make up for the problems with the car alarm.

“Do you want me to give you a ride?”

I jolted upright at the low voice & turned around. Chris stood there, clad in all black as usual, looking as tall as a tree, his face solemn but his bright eyes full of mischief. His hands were clasped behind his back as he looked down at me, more with his eyes than actually tilting his head. He stood so close to me that, even though I wasn’t making physical contact with him or his car, I was still very much pinned between them. I looked up at him & said the first clever thing that came to mind.

“Hi!” 

It came out a little more high pitched than I wanted.

A small smile curled up one corner of his mouth, “Hi.” He didn’t move. 

I looked over my shoulder at his car & motioned back at it with my hand. I looked back up at him.

“It looked so good, I wanted to get a closer look. To see how good it looked. You know, up close, through the windshield, because the tinting thing…”

He raised both eyebrows as he slowly nodded his head as if to say “uh huh, really?” But he didn’t say a word & he still didn’t move.

My nose started to itch, & as I scratched it I felt the bizarre need to continue rambling.

“So I looked here,” I pointed at the windshield, “because your other windows are so...dark.”

“Because of the tinting thing.” His voice was quiet but noticeably sweet sounding as he gently pouted his lower lip.

“Yeah, the...tinting thing...on the windows…,” I pointed to the rear windows, “...back there.” I gave him a sheepish smile, “I’m done now.”

He kept his amused eyes on me as he finally took a few steps back. His hands were still clasped behind his back as he nodded towards the building in front of us.

“Would you like to come inside?” Even his sweet tone had an amused note to it.

What happened to the cool, calm & collected girl from yesterday, I thought. I let out a sigh. 

“Please.”

As he slowly walked me to the studio he put his left hand in his coat pocket & wrapped his right arm around my shoulders, gently tucking me against his side. I looked up at him & he smiled sweetly at me, his deep blue eyes warm & comforting.

“Tinting’s a bitch, isn’t it?” His soft voice & facial expression feigning annoyance.

I let out a laugh & felt my cheeks heat up. I covered up my face with both hands & shook my head. Chris chuckled & pulled me tighter against his side.

I lowered my hands but couldn’t look at him, “I have no idea why I turned into such a freak back there.”

“I happen to like freaks.”

I looked back up at him & he nodded.

“Mmhmm…they really turn me on.” He gave me a exaggerated lecherous look. 

I laughed softly.

“You think I’m joking, don’t you.”

He punched in the code to the building’s rear security door & held it open for me. As it shut heavily behind us, I gave him a friendly questioning look. He unbuttoned his black leather coat as his expression changed to sultry serious. 

“I’m not.”

As we walked into his studio, I came face to face with Ulli & Viki. They were both seated next to each other in a couple of those rolling office chairs, & they were looking at something on Ulli’s phone.

“Maddy…,” Chris’ tone of voice was chipper but a little louder than normal as if to get the women’s attention. “I’d like you to meet Ulli und (and) Viki.”

Both of them looked up at the same time & I found myself holding my breath for some reason. They both gave me a big smile in unison & I finally exhaled, returning their friendly smiles.

“Ulli, Viki, this is Madeline, my new assistant.”

They stood up & the three of us extended our hands at the same time. We all let out a little laugh & they took turns shaking my hand as we introduced each other. 

“Please call me Maddy.”

Chris hung up his leather coat & sat down on the same couch that had been my “perch” for the past two days. He picked up his vaping device from the coffee table, fiddled with it for a moment, inhaled slowly, & gently blew out a long thick stream of pure white mist up towards the ceiling. He watched the three of us get acquainted & he had a slightly amused look on his face.

Although Viki’s English wasn’t as strong as Chris & Ulli’s, it was still easy to understand her. And with my German getting a little better, the three of us communicated effortlessly with each other.

Ulli’s personality was similar to Chris’. She was upbeat but there was an underlying touch of shyness. You could see the playfulness in both her smile & eyes but she also had this wonderful calm, serene demeanor. She came across as a curious mix of mischievous sprite & wise “old soul”, & that made me feel very at ease with her. 

Viki, though, was pure Energizer Bunny. Her personality was as bright & vivacious as her sparkling blue eyes. But at the same time, there was a curious depth to her that I couldn’t quite put my finger on. She also came across as an “old soul” but in a different way than Ulli, more like, in how she understood people. She seemed like one of those people that, due to maybe things she had been through in her own life, could easily see through someone’s bullshit if they tried to pull anything over on her. I always admired people that had that ability & took an immediate liking to her also.

“I have something for you.” Ulli’s smile was cute as she stepped over to a tote bag on a table & removed something wrapped in brown butcher paper. She handed it to me.

I raised my eyebrows in curiosity as I pulled off the outer wrapping. It was a green plant, about a foot tall, in a pretty ceramic pot.

Ulli pointed to several small light green buds that dotted the top of the plant.

“These little pods will open & a small white flower will come out of each one. But it will only happen under moonlight. Only moonlight.”

“Oh wow, thank you! I can’t wait to see that happen!” I was truly excited. I’d heard of these types of flowers that only bloom at night or with moonlight, but I’d never had one.

Ulli pointed to the little buds again, “And the smell when they open...wow, sehr schön (very beautiful).”

“Thank you so much! But you didn’t have to, those coffee mugs & the wonderful chocolates & candies you & Chris gave me were already really nice.”

The songstress pouted her lower lip & “shooed” her hand at me, “Ach (Oh), that was nothing, ein kleines Etwas (a little something) for around here. This is for your new home here in Berlin, after such a big move.” She motioned her hand at Viki & herself, “We said to each other we could never do that, move halfway around the world like you did.”

“You are mutig (brave).” Viki nodded at me.

I smiled at Viki, “Oder verrückt (Or crazy).”

Chris chuckled & chimed in, “Oder verrückt, genau (Or crazy, exactly).”

Ulli glanced at her bandmate & huffed at him, “Puhhh, no. Mutig, sehr sehr mutig (Brave, very very brave).”

I gave Ulli a warm look & tipped the lovely new plant in her direction, “Thank you,” my tone sincere & meant for the gift & her sentiment on my long distance relocation.

She gave me a sweet acknowledging look, her tone soft, “You are very welcome, Maddy.”

“Now my turn!” Viki’s excited voice.

All three of us watched her as she quickly walked over to the same table that Ulli’s tote bag sat on. She picked up a gift box & trotted back over to me, her smile big.

“Also for your home.”

I returned her big smile, lifted off the top, & pulled aside the blush pink tissue paper that held my gift. It was a small smiling pig, about 6” long by 3” high, carved out of a heavy type of dark wood. The detail was amazing. I picked it up & turned it over in my hands, looking at all angles. It was beautiful.

Viki stepped closer & pointed at the rectangle base that the pig stood on.

“See?”

I looked & noticed the engraving was in English, it said “Home Sweet Home”.

“Um, in Germany, the pig is good luck. You put one, like this, in your house & it brings Wohlstand (prosperity) & good health. The writing I said to put in English because you come so far from America, so like, halb Englisch (half English) the writing, from your old home, und halb Deutsch (and half German) the pig, for your new home.” 

I was truly touched & my eyes teared up a little, “Thank you, Viki, this is really sweet.”

“You are welcome,” her smile was warm.

“Oh my, Gott (God).” Ulli wiped her fingers under her eyes, “It’s too early to cry.”

I chuckled, & when I did, a couple of tiny tears escaped & I wiped them quickly away.

Viki gave Ulli a quick hug, “Ooh, keine Tränen (no tears).”

She released the teary eyed singer, turned to me, & gave me a quick hug, too, “Keine Tränen, keine Tränen (No tears, no tears).”

“Zu spät (Too late).” Chris’ amused voice piped up.

All three of us looked at him & he blew a long white stream of vapor off to the side. He raised both eyebrows & smiled broadly.

Mario came into the room & passed through Chris’ vapor cloud. He carried what looked like an old school VCR, but I knew it was either a piece of recording or music equipment.

“Guten Morgen, an alle (Good morning, to all).” His voice was cheery, “Ah, Maddy! You’re still with us! Chris did not scare you away, then.”

Everyone greeted Mario with a returned “Guten Morgen”.

I smiled at the chipper producer, “Yup, I’m still here.”

Mario set the device down at the back of the room next to a stack of similar looking electronics & grinned at me, “Very good, I was hoping he wouldn’t run you off.”

“Hey…” Chris frowned at his friend, “I’m not scary.”

Ulli folded up her tote bag & set it next to her handbag. She put her hands on her hips in a relaxed manner & looked at her frowning musical partner, “No, not all the time.”

Chris smirked at the singer & Ulli gave me a wink as she smiled teasingly back at him. 

Mario crouched down & crawled under the same table Chris had been under a couple of days ago. As he began rearranging some wires, Ulli & Viki admired each other’s gifts to me & our three way conversation was pleasant. Chris released another puffy cloud of white steam as he kept his playful eyes on us.

“Zehn Minuten, nur zehn Minuten (10 minutes, only 10 minutes).”

I recognized that grumpy voice.

Gordon emerged from Chris’ vapor cloud waving his long arm, dispersing the smoke. Chris glanced up at his cranky friend from his slouched position on the couch. 

The tall grumpy man locked his eyes on Viki, “Komm jetzt (Come now).”

Chris’ girlfriend jumped & gave Gordon an apologetic look, “Ach, ich habe vergessen (Oh, I forgot)!”

She set down the plant Ulli had given me & hurried around the room collecting her things. 

Ulli looked up at Gordon, “Was ist los (What’s up)?”

Gordon explained to her in German that Viki wanted him to follow her in his car so she could drop her car off at the mechanic. He continued, saying that she had asked him to wait in the rear parking lot & that she’d be out in 10 minutes. That was almost 30 minutes ago.

Viki rushed past the cranky man saying she wanted to pee one more time. Gordon rolled his eyes. He looked down at his very amused friend who sat slouched, contentedly vaping away, slowly rocking his long legs back & forth, innocently watching everyone. Gordon lightly kicked Chris sneaker with the same heavy black combat boots he wore the other day.

“First this one, drive me, drive me. Now that one…,” he nodded in the bathrooms direction, “...drive me, drive me.”

“I thought you liked driving me.” Chris looked up at his disgruntled former bassist & a humorous evil look quickly flashed across his handsome bearded face. 

Gordon narrowed his blue eyes, raised his middle finger, & shot the same look back at the playful Goth. Chris kept his gaze locked on his friend, an impish smile on his lips. He continued to slowly rock his legs. 

“Maddy Madeline, nice to see you again.” Gordon lowered his finger & slowly turned his head towards me. His evil look morphed into a friendly smile.

I smiled back, “Hi, Gordon.”

“Viki!” Gordon’s voice bellowed across the room.

Viki’s muffled voice immediately responded from behind the closed bathroom door, “Ok, ok!”

Gordon rested his hands on his hips, he looked down at Chris again, then over at Ulli & I.

“Typical, one rooster with three hens.”

Chris exhaled a thick stream of vapor directly up at his kvetching buddies head. 

Mario’s voice chimed out from under the table, “Hey, I’m here, too.”

Gordon grunted, “Sorry...four hens.”

“Ha! Mario…” Chris’s sudden exclamation combined with Gordon’s remark made Ulli & I laugh. Hearing Viki’s muffled laughter from the bathroom made us laugh harder.

“Haha, ja (yes), very funny, Mario is a girl.” The producer, still working under the table, added his two cents with good-natured annoyance. 

Chris & Gordon both let out a snort & laughed.

Gordon tilted his head back & bellowed again, “Viki!”

She scampered quickly out of the bathroom & over to the impatient Goth, her smile big & sweet as she looked up at him, “Ok, lass uns gehen (let’s go)!”

He looked down at her & sighed loudly. He turned & walked out the studio grumbling, “I could be at home watching a porno & masturbating but no, I have to be a nice guy & drive you.”

Ulli & Viki made an “ewww” face & Ulli shook her head quickly as if trying to block that image. 

Chris let out an evil, “Heh.”

Gordon stuck his head back in the room & looked down at Chris, “It’s a good one, too, new also. You should see these five girls go at it, there’s also bananas, sausages, whipped cream & a very hungry goat. Mmmmm… I’ll send it to you.” He grinned wickedly, winked at his friend & pulled his head back out of the room.

Chris’ smile was big as he turned back to us. Ulli & Viki continued to make their “ewww” face at him also. 

Viki gave Ulli a quick kiss on the cheek, “Ciao, ciao!”

She scampered over to me & also gave me the same quick peck on the cheek, “Ciao, ciao!”

“Viki!” Gordon’s voice boomed from the building’s rear security door.

Ulli, Viki, myself & even Chris made a scared face.

“Ja (Yes), Gordon! Ach (Oh)...” Viki called back loudly.

She trotted over to Chris, bent down, & gave him a quick peck on the lips, “Ciao, ciao!”

He gave her a warm smile, “Ciao.”

As the Energizer Bunny rushed out the studio door, Mario approached Chris & let him know that he was ready any time Chris was. Chris acknowledged Mario with a nod & slowly rose to his feet. He looked up at the ceiling & stretched both long arms up towards it, touching it with his finger tips. His eyes were closed & he wore an ear to ear lazy smile.

“Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, mmmmm…” His voice had a sultry quality to it as he obviously enjoyed languidly stretching his very long body.

Mario informed Chris he was going to run a few sound checks & to let him know when he & Ulli were ready. 

Chris gave the cheerful producer a pat on the back & a friendly wink, “Danke (Thank you).”

Mario flashed a smile at me, “I will probably see you, maybe, on & off today but I just want to say welcome to our crazy little family, Maddy.”

“Thank you, Mario, I appreciate that.” I gave him a sincere, heart felt smile.

“Ok, then I will go get ready & I’m sure Chris is about to drown you with work." Ulli nodded at me.”

“Thank you, again, for my lovely new plant. I’ll find the perfect place for it tonight when I get home.”

“Remember, when it blooms, ahhh, smells so good. I have one, too, at home.”

“I’ll make sure to remember.”

Ulli’s expression was sweet, “Bis später, dann (Until later, then).” 

She picked up some sheets of paper from a nearby table & left the room with Mario.

Chris shoved both of his hands into the pockets of his black pants. He walked over to me & looked down at me for a few silent moments, his soft sweet expression becoming so familiar to me.

“Ready to work for a very tough, mean boss?”

I gave a single confident nod, “I’m ready.”

“Ready to submit to all of my orders & demands?” His face & voice all exaggerated sternness.

I grinned up at him, “Yup.”

He raised one sharp eyebrow in an intimidating manner, “I can be uncompromising, unyielding…”

“I can handle it.”

“Relentless, merciless…”

His deep blue eyes held my gaze & my grin began to fade as a different sensation began to slide through me.

I swallowed, “I can...take it.”

“Brutal…” His voice quiet & low, the sharp lifted brow relaxed again.

I nodded slowly, “I understand.” My voice also quiet.

His hypnotic eyes scanning my wide eyes slowly. 

“Sadistic…” His voice so quiet it was almost a whisper.

“Yes.” My voice more breath than sound.

That strange, intriguing silence between us again. He narrowed his beautiful eyes ever so slightly & the tip of his pink tongue peeked out briefly. He opened his mouth just a bit & took in a little breath.

My eyes fell on his small silver lip ring & I wondered what it would feel like pressed against my lips. Would the metal feel cold, icy? Or would it be warm, since it was constantly being caressed by his warm breath. What would that delicate little silver hoop feel like pressed against other parts of my body? What would it feel like to him if I gently flicked it back & forth with the tip of my tongue? Or, maybe, gently pulled on it with my teeth? I was sure I wouldn’t be the first girl to try that. But still… I wondered.

“Cum.”

I blinked & moved my gaze up from his seductive mouth back to his blue eyes. My brain felt like it was coated in molasses. Did he just tell me to “cum”?

“Come,” he quietly repeated himself & gently nodded towards his right. He gave me a small mellow smile, the gentleness also in his facial expression.

He led me to one of the cluttered tables & rested his left hand on three small boxes stacked together. 

“This is your first assignment,” a cute little smirk. “These need to go to Out Of Line today. The other things I need done I sent to your phone & I sent a copy to your computer.”

“Ok, perfect, I’ll make sure everything gets taken care of.” I felt like I had just woken up from a long nap & my voice was a little thick.

“Good,” his voice tender & sweet sounding. “I have to go, I’m sure Ulli & Mario are tired of waiting for me. Call me if you have any questions, or if my directions or instructions are confusing. I sometimes forget that not everyone thinks the way I do.” His smile grew a little wider & a touch of shyness fell across his face.

“Ok, sure. You & Ulli have a good day recording, Mario too.”

“Thank you, Maddy. See you later.” 

Chris gave me a little tip of his head & walked out of the room. I checked my phone for my assignments, gathered up the three boxes & my new plant & carved pig, & also my messenger bag, & headed out to my car. It was cool & cloudy outside, but dry. As I drove out of the parking lot to my first stop, I suddenly realized that this was truly the official start of my new life, working as Chris’ new assistant, heading off to tackle my first task. I also suddenly realized that my panties were wet. I bit my lower lip & let out a long sigh. Oh, boy...


	9. The Message Party

With Chris & Ulli resuming their work on the new album, I was just as busy as I’d imagined I would be, & that was good. Before I knew it, days had turned into weeks & weeks into months. 

As time flew by, I built close relationships with Ulli, Mario, Viki, Gordon & even some of their personal friends. Chris & I had also grown wonderfully closer as friends & I was honored that he, & the rest of “the crazy little family” as Mario had described them, considered me part of their trusted & private inner circle. And as I quickly came to realize, it was truly an exclusive & privileged place to be.

I had also started occasionally going out again to clubs & parties with my other friends, & I’d even gone on a couple of dates with guys I’d met through them. My heart, though, still wasn’t fully on board with my tentative re-emergence in the dating scene. My friend Claudia, who had helped me tremendously with my transatlantic move, assured me that it was like riding a bike. She said that if I just continued to casually date, nothing serious for now, that my heart would soon fall in line & I would enjoy it once again. Although I very much appreciated her advice & confidence in my heart, I was still feeling gun shy.

My attraction to Chris was as strong as ever, but instead of fighting it I learned to make peace with it & accept it. We still had our verbal flirtatious moments but through conversations with Ulli, Gordon & Viki, I learned that this was just how Chris had always been with women he felt comfortable with & felt connected to. They also told me that this wasn’t some “act” he was putting on or joke he was playing where he was intentionally trying to make someone feel embarrassed or uncomfortable. Ulli explained that it was simply another way Chris had of showing his affection. Or, as Viki so succinctly put it, “It means he likes you.”

Chris had also finally gotten everyone to agree on a date for his “video game night”. It would be on a Saturday two weeks from now & he & Viki would host it at their place. Chris created & sent out cute e-vites to all the guests with specific information & instructions on how this was going to go down. 

According to the e-vite, the guest list included myself, Ulli, Viki, Gordon, Mario, Chris Harms & Gared Dirge. When I saw the names of the Lord of The Lost guys I was excited. I’d never met them before & I knew their addition would make the night that much more fun. The e-vite also included a hard start time of 5pm & that any early arrivals would be “sent away”. Second, the end time was noted as “last man standing”. Third, there would be tons of food & drinks so “don’t bring anything”. Fourth, parking “you’re on your own”. Fifth, dress code “yes please wear something”. Sixth, cell phones would be “confiscated at the door to prevent incriminating pics from leaking”. Seventh, “PRIVATE PARTY NO UNINVITED GUESTS”. Eighth, “what happens in my house stays in my house”. Ninth, “please read #8”. Tenth, “please read #9”. 

The e-vite went out a little past midnight & I was already in bed when I received it. It took only one minute from the time it was sent before a group text started flying around. The first message I saw was from Ulli.

Ulli … oh look how nice he invited Viki 

Ulli … she lives there

Chris P … typo sorry

Gordon … fucking Harms

Viki … no typo he invited me :) 

Gared … I will be the last man standing :) 

Chris H - Gordon … stop talking about ur fantasy

Ulli … why is no one sleeping?

Mario - Viki … I’m happy he invited u :) 

Chris H - Gared … Pohl said last MAN standing

Gordon - Chris H … that leaves u out too

Me … hi :) 

Viki - Mario … :) :) :)

Viki … hi Maddy :)

Chris P - Mario … typo

Gared - Ulli … message party is better than sleep ;) 

Me … hi Viki I’m glad he invited u too :)

Chris H - Gordon … ur out also bitch

Ulli - Gared ... everyone here is crazy 

Mario ... hi Maddy :) 

Chris P - Me … typo

Gordon - Chris H … hahahaha asshole 

Me … hi Mario :) 

Gared - Gordon … hahahahaha

Chris H … is this Maddy person Pohls new assistant I heard about?

Ulli - Chris H … yes

Chris P - Chris H … yes

Gordon - Chris H … yes fucker

Viki - Chris H … yes

Mario - Chris H … yes 

Viki - Chris P … no typo :)

Viki - Chris P … thank u for invitation :) 

Me … Gordon & Chris H don’t like each other :( 

Chris P - Viki … typo

Chris P - Me … they are good friends they are always like this

Gordon - Chris H … her name is not “this Maddy person” its Madeline

Gared … hi Madeline I look forward to meeting u at the video game party :) 

Viki - Chris P … no typo :)

Ulli ... ok I’m sleepy I’m going to bed

Me … hi Gared same for me please call me Maddy :) 

Chris H - Me … I think someone likes u Madeline

Chris P - Viki … Viki

Mario - Chris H … I like Maddy :) 

Viki - Chris H … I like Maddy too :) 

Chris P - Ulli … good night

Viki - Chris P … what?

Me … aww I like u too Mario Viki :) :) 

Me - Chris H … I like Gordon too u can call me Maddy if u want :) 

Chris H - Me … Hallo Maddy Gordon knows what I mean

Chris P - Viki … Viki

Ulli - Chris H … so what if he likes her I think its nice

Viki - Chris H … I think its nice too :) 

Viki - Chris P … what what??

Gordon - Chris H … yes I know what u mean so what?

Mario - Ulli … I thought u went to bed?

Chris P - Viki … typo ;)

Gared - Me … I don’t know u yet but I think its nice too :)

Viki - Chris P … hahaha :) <3 

Chris H - Gordon … I was just making an observation thats all

Chris P - Mario … she always lies about going to bed ;)

Me - Gared … aww you sound very sweet 

Ulli - Mario … Now I’m in bed

Ulli - Mario … I did not say I’m going to sleep :)

Chris P - Mario … see?

Gared - Me … u sound sweet too :)

Chris H … “ur so sweet” “no ur sweeter” omfg

Mario … its so late where is everyone?

Me - Gordon … hi :)

Gared … I’m at home

Chris P … studio

Chris H … studio

Mario … home

Me … home 

Viki … home

Mario - Chris P … studio? something wrong? should I come in?

Gordon - Chris P … everything ok?

Gordon - Me … Maddy Madeline :)

Ulli - Chris P … studio? Its after midnight

Chris P … everything is ok just some remixing

Chris P … u know me ;)

Chris H - Gordon … pet name & a smiley face 

Chris H … I feel warm & fuzzy

Gared - Chris P … I hear rumors ur new album is going to be really great

Gordon - Chris H … tell me if u feel warm & fuzzy after I shove my boot up ur ass

Ulli - Gared … the rumors are right this time :)

Chris P - Gared … it IS going to be great ;)

Mario - Gared … not rumors truth :) 

Viki … I’m getting sleepy

Me … Me too 

Chris H - Gordon … more fantasies Mocznay?

Ulli … I’m sleepy also

Ulli … now I AM going to sleep

Ulli … good night everyone 

Chris P - Ulli … good night see u in the morning

Gared - Ulli … good night :)

Gordon - Ulli … sleep well good night

Me - Ulli … good night sweet dreams :)

Viki - Ulli … sleep well sweet dreams :)

Chris H - Ulli … peaceful night peaceful dreams

Mario - Ulli … good night Ulli 

Mario … I’m going to follow her example & say good night also

Chris P … everything everyone just said to Ulli goes to u also Mario ;)

Mario - Chris P … haha that works for me

Mario - Chris P … u go home too don't stay there all night

Chris P - Mario … I won’t ;) good night Mario

Mario - Chris P … good night Chris :) 

Chris H … how come no is concerned why I’m still in the studio so late?

Gared - Chris H … I’m concerned :)

Viki - Chris H … I’m concerned too :)

Me - Chris H … Me too :)

Gordon … I’m not

Chris P … haha I’m not either

Viki - Me … Maddy :)

Me - Viki … Viki :)

Gared … I’m falling asleep * yawn *

Chris P - Gared … I’m tired too

Chris P … I think I’m going to take Marios advice & get out of here soon

Viki - Me … Come tuck me in :)

Me - Viki … ok :)

Gared … Viki Maddy ??

Gordon … I get to watch

Chris P … I get to participate 

Chris H … and suddenly no one is tired anymore

Gared - Chris H … hahaha

Viki - Me … & kiss me good night :)

Me - Viki … on the forehead?

Viki - Me … no :)

Gared … ooh can I play?

Viki - Gared … yes :)

Me - Gared … yes :)

Gordon - Gared … no

Chris P - Gared … no

Chris H … what about me?

Gordon - Chris H … theres a new porno u might be more interested in 

Gordon - Chris H … 50 Shades of Gay

Gared … hahahahahaha

Chris P … HA! fucking Harms

Chris H - Gordon … sorry not interested in seeing ur old tc audition video

Gared … hahahahahahahahahaha

Chris P - Chris H … I heard u had all ur guys audition with their mouth

Chris P - Chris H … over & over again

Gared … hey!

Gordon - Chris H … hahahahahaha prick

Chris P - Gared … not u

Chris H - Chris P … I thought I recognized ur pretty mouth Pohl 

Chris H - Chris P … wanna stop by my studio on ur way home & remind me how good u were?

Chris H - Chris P … oh thats right 

Chris H - Chris P … u didnt make the cut the 1st time

Chris H - Chris P … never mind

Gared … oooooh

Viki … ok ok no more

Me … everyone is even now

Viki … yea even

Chris P … fuck even

Gordon … Harms mutherfucker 

Viki … Chris Gordon stop no more

Me … please Gordon

Gared … yea maybe stop now

Chris H … better listen to the girls Pohl Mocznay

Gared … hey!

Chris H - Gared … not u for fuck sake

Chris P … better listen to the girls or fucking what Harms?

Gordon … what the fuck u gonna do Harms u pussy limp dick cocksucker?????

Viki … Chris! no more!

Me … Gordon stop please

Chris H … I still only hear good advice from ur girls Pohl Mocznay

Gared - Chris H … how about I come to the studio & we go out for some drinks? 

Gared - Chris H … we can check out that new strip club the guys were talking about

Gared - Chris H … we’ll have a good time 

Gared - Chris H … I’ll tell u some of my bad jokes u hate so much but u always still laugh :)

Viki … Gared good idea

Gared - Viki … :)

Viki - Gared … :)

Gared - Me … :)

Me - Gared … :) thank u

Gared … I still look forward to meeting u at the party Maddy :)

Gared … if Pohl is still having it after this :( 

Chris P … sure Gared its still on 

Chris P … everyone is still invited

Viki - Chris P … even Harms? :)

Me - Chris P … ?? :)

Gared - Chris P … ?? :)

Chris P … even Harms

Chris H … always such a noble gentleman Pohl 

Chris H … I guess its not just an act with all the nice suits & everything

Gordon … fuck u Harms u fucking asshole shut the fuck up before I pound u 

Chris H … u mean pound me with ur dick right? fuck u Mocznay

Chris P … fuck u Harms u prick

Gared - Chris H … stop it Chris! Enough!

Me … Gordon please no more :( 

Viki … Chris! Stop!

Viki … omg they are like fucking wild dogs

Chris H … yes Viki Maddy put ur dogs back on their leash

Viki - Chris H … you stop too

Viki - Chris H … youre not making it better

Gared - Chris H … cmon sign off now

Gared - Chris H … I’ll pick u up in 20 minutes ok? We’ll go have fun :)

Chris H - Gared … make it 30 I have to finish downloading some stuff

Gared - Chris H … perfect see u in 30 :)

Viki … thank u again Gared :)

Gared … no problem Viki :) I’m gonna go now 

Gared … nice to meet u Maddy sorry it had to be like this :(

Gared - Me … we’ll talk at the party ok? :)

Me - Gared … I look forward to it :)

Gared … good night everyone :)

Viki … good night Gared thank u for helping :)

Me … good night Gared :)

Gordon … good night Gared sorry u got stuck in the middle

Gared - Gordon … its ok I’m a tough guy ;)

Chris P … good night Gared yes u are a tough guy ;)

Viki - Me … sorry u had to see that

Viki - Me … they really are all good friends

Viki - Me … they just get like that sometimes

Viki - Me … I’ve been thru it with them before

Viki - Me … too much testosterone all flowing at the same time :)

Me - Viki … I think so too :)

Gordon - Viki … that makes it sound like we just came all over each other

Chris P … haha I thought the same thing

Viki … eww

Me … I thought the same thing sorry

Gordon … hahaha Maddy

Chris P - Viki … see even Maddy 

Viki … ok maybe that was bad example haha I see it now

Chris P - Viki … I’m going to leave in a few minutes

Chris P - Viki … I’ll see u soon ;)

Viki - Chris P … ok drive safe :)

Chris P - Gordon … we’ll go get drunk after work tomorrow

Chris P - Gordon … its after 1am so actually after work TODAY ok?

Gordon - Chris P … fuck yes

Chris P - Me … sorry about all this 

Chris P - Me … you ok?

Me - Chris P … I’m ok :)

Chris P - Me … then I will see u tomorrow 

Chris P - Me … I mean TODAY just later 

Me - Chris P … see u later today :) good night Chris 

Chris P … good night Maddy ;)

Viki … good night Maddy & Gordon :)

Me … good nite Viki :)

Gordon … sleep well Viki

Gordon … Maddy Madeline 

Me … Gordy Gordon

Gordon … it took u this long to come up with that??

Me … haha yup maybe because we are up so late :)

Gordon … I want to see u

Me … want to meet up for lunch tomorrow?

Me ... I mean later today? :) 

Gordon … … … 

Gordon … now

Me … … …

Me … ok

Gordon … can I come over?

Me … … …

Me … yes ... ... ... ... ...


	10. Yes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I often find inspiration through music. This chapter was inspired by Use Somebody, by Kings of Leon. When I heard it, I just knew.

I sat up on the edge of my bed & turned on the little lamp that sat on the night stand. A soft yellowish glow filled my small bedroom. I looked down at the phone still cradled in my hand & stared at my “yes” response to Gordon. 

Yes, to what? Yes, to him coming over for a pleasant visit? Yes, to a late night chat at my place over coffee? Yes, to sex? My inner Adult Maddy spoke up, “A grown man, that’s also a close friend, asks to come to your home at 1:15 am & he sounds perfectly sober & lucid - If he wanted to continue to talk to you, he could have done it in the group text you two were already on - If he wanted a more private conversation, he could text you directly or simply call you - He told you last month that he & his long-time girlfriend had separated again, & he also told you that when that happens they have an understanding that it’s ok to “date” other people while they’re apart - Wanna run that by me again as to why you think he wants to see you, & more importantly, why you said yes?”

I sighed quietly & propped my phone up in the little cell phone holder that sat next to my lamp. I got up & walked into the bathroom, turned on the light & the faucet, & rinsed my face with some cold water. As I patted my face dry, I looked at my reflection in the mirror. Yes, I do know why he wants to come over, & I do know why I said “yes”. I gently brushed my hair & pinned it up in a loose bun. 

Although I was still gun shy about getting back into the dating world & possibly starting a new relationship, I still missed being with someone, being held by someone, being kissed by someone, being touched by someone. But not just anyone, someone that I did care about & loved as a friend, & a small blue vibrator can only go so far. 

I put one little dab of soft perfume behind each ear & ran a little clear lip balm across my lips. I also had to stop being foolish & stop waiting for Chris to make some kind of “first move”. His flirtatious nature was just a part of his wonderful personality, he was with Viki, Viki was my friend, I was his employee, & that was the end of it. Ulli, Gordon & even Mario had told me that Chris may be a lot of things, but two things he wasn’t, & never was as long as they’d known him, was a liar & a cheater. If he broke up with a girl it was either mutual or she had been the one that had lied or cheated. I remember thinking how odd that sounded, who would ever cheat on Chris? Gordon had thought that my disbelief was funny, “Listen to some of Chris’ earlier music, especially TC stuff. “Pull The Trigger” sound like a happy song? The lyrics are fucked up. Chris writes his music from personal experience, personal feelings, TC yesterday or Blutengel today, doesn’t matter.”

I turned off the bathroom light & went back into the softly lit bedroom. I put on my pink terrycloth robe over my usual sleep attire, the ever awesome t-shirt & panties, & tied the sash. Not exactly the Victoria’s Secret look, but it’s not like I’d had a reason to buy frilly underwear anyway. And this pink terrycloth robe. I ran my hands over the material. Yup, that’s terrycloth. The same pink terrycloth robe every little girl 10 & under used to have & every woman 65 & older currently has. I sighed again.

There was a quiet knock on the front door. I took a deep breath & exhaled slowly. As I passed through the dark entryway I turned on a small table lamp. I peeked through the peephole in the door & saw Gordon standing there in the quiet well lit hallway. I slid back the security chain, unlocked the deadbolt & the little doorknob lock, & opened the door. 

He stood there in black pants tucked into knee-high black combat boots, a black sweater & a black leather jacket. His left hand was shoved into his pants pocket & in his right hand he held an array of brightly colored pinwheels, there had to have been at least a dozen. I couldn’t help but smile at the image of this very tall Goth with a solemn look on his face, dressed all in black, holding pinwheels. 

“Berlin doesn’t seem to have an all-night flower shop, but apparently it does have an all-night children’s toy shop for some reason. I don’t know how to do the whole romantic thing, so here.” His voice was low & soft as he thrust the bunch-o-pinwheels at me that were clasped in his large right fist. I eyed the multi-colored toys with genuine pleasure & grinned up at him as I took them from his hand.

“Thank you, Gordon, they’re really lovely,” my tone sincere. “Please, come in.”

As he stepped inside, I shut the door & noticed that the sticks of the pinwheel bouquet were bundled together with bright green tape. I grinned again & pointed to the tape as I looked up at him.

“The stems?”

He gave me a small smile & nodded, “I asked the clerk if he had any green ribbon. He said no, but said he did have some green shipping tape, so…” Gordon pointed at the “stems”.

At that moment, I was sure that if I’d looked up the word “sweet” in the dictionary there would simply be a picture of the man standing before me. 

I gave him a teasing smile, “I’ll be sure to put them in some water.”

Gordon took a step towards me, bent down & scooped me up in his arms. He cradled my ass in the palms of his hands, my knees on either side of his waist. 

“You can do that tomorrow, they’ll survive.”

I held onto the back of his neck with my left hand & the bouquet of pinwheels with my right. He looked over my shoulder for a moment, then started walking towards the bedroom. When he looked back at me, his expression was serious but there was a softness in his bright blue eyes.

He laid me carefully on the bed & gently took the colorful “flowers” from my hand, setting them down on the nightstand next to my phone. He climbed into bed on top of me, one of his knees on either side of my legs, & sat back on the heels of his boots. I gave him a soft smile & he returned it. 

He leaned forward, placing one palm on either side of me. Since he was quite a bit taller than I was he moved backwards slowly on his hands & knees until we were eye level. I looked up into his warm eyes.

“Are you going to romance me now?” My voice quietly teasing.

His voice just as quiet, “I’m going to romance the fuck out of you.”

My smile grew wide. He lowered his face & I eagerly accepted his first kiss. His tongue slowly but deeply sought out mine & my tongue sought his out just as passionately. My hands caressed the back of his neck as we continued to kiss for several minutes. 

He pulled his face back & slid his knee between my legs, parting them. As my legs opened for him, he placed his other knee between them also. As he parted his long legs wider, causing mine to do the same, he sat up on the heels of his boots again. 

I watched his hands as he reached down & untied my robe, parting it completely open. His eyes roamed slowly up & down my body & he ran his fingertips across my belly. I lifted my legs a little & rubbed them softly against the outside of his thighs feeling the slightly rough material of his black pants. 

His eyes flashed up at me & he ran his hands firmly up & down my calves several times. He slid his hands all the way up my legs, past my hips & up to my chest. He caressed both of my breasts at the same time over my thin t-shirt. I arched my back slightly & pressed them up against his kneading fingers. I let out a soft moan & placed my hands over his, shadowing his motion. He moved his thumbs carefully back & forth over my stiff nipples & I bit my lower lip letting out a barely audible, “Gordon…”

I rubbed my legs a little harder against the outside of his thighs as he moved his hands to the bottom of my shirt, lifting it up over my swollen breasts, exposing them fully. He slid down my body & ran the flat of his tongue repeatedly across my right nipple. A moan escaped my lips as my hands held the back of his head. 

His mouth moved unhurriedly back & forth between both of my breasts, licking, sucking & tasting each one. Soft grunts slipped from his lips as he gently pulled at my hard nipples with his teeth. He hovered his warm mouth over my left breast & rapidly flicked the tip of his long tongue across my erect nipple. I let out a groan.

He slid back up & kissed me deeply again, his hot tongue snaking itself around mine. I moaned tenderly into his mouth, moving the sole of my right foot slowly back & forth across his ass. I rubbed my left leg high up against the side of his waist. He pulled his mouth back & I could see the lust in his eyes.

He raised back up on his knees & pulled my arms free from the sleeves of my open robe. He slid the robe out from under me & tossed it to the foot of the bed. He then pulled my pushed up t-shirt off over my head & also tossed that aside. I was now nude except for my white cotton panties. He ran his hands firmly up & down my entire body from my hips, over my breasts, under my arms, up to my shoulders & back down across my belly again. I looked into his eyes & didn’t try to hide the desire I had for him.

As he lowered himself back down on me, he burrowed his face against the side of my neck. I felt his tongue lick my skin several times in one spot & then he let out a groan as he roughly bit the side of my neck. I whimpered with pleasure & pain & felt him start to suck intensely on one spot. He was giving me a hard love bite & I didn’t want him to stop.

My eyes were closed as I turned my head & exposed as much of my neck as I could to him. He would stop sucking for a few moments, repeatedly lick the same spot, & then resume biting & sucking again as he moaned deeply against my neck.

I wrapped my arms around him, but his leather jacket felt cold & damp from the drizzly night air, so I slipped my arms under his jacket & rubbed his warm back over his soft black sweater. I wrapped my legs around his waist & pulled him tightly down to me. 

I didn’t realize until that moment how much I missed this, holding a man tight that I truly cared about, feeling the full weight of his body on top of me, hearing his deep masculine moans as he eagerly took his pleasure from me & returned that pleasure to me just as eagerly.

He released my neck & sat up again, pulling off his jacket & adding it to the growing pile of discarded clothes. He quickly hooked his right arm under my hips & pulled them tightly to meet his. He locked his eyes on mine, his eyes two burning blue flames, & placed his left hand back down on the bed. 

He pressed the rigid bulge in his pants roughly against the crotch of my panties & began to grind. I let out a gasp, & because he held my hips up to his it caused my back to arch, & my hands searched for something to hold onto. I grabbed the sheets on either side of me & slid both of my knees high up on his sides. Because he held my lower half slightly off the bed, I didn’t have much leverage & was at the mercy of his movements. 

Stopping for only a moment, he pulled his right arm from under my hips, placed it on the bed next to my head & pressed himself even tighter between my legs. He looked down directly into my eyes & started grinding intensely & more quickly. Since my hips were back on the bed, I could begin to match his rhythm.

My hands held onto his lower back & I kept my eyes locked on his. I lifted my head up to his & kissed him passionately. He responded with equal fervor, our bodies movements in perfect unison. As I lay my head back down he continued to kiss me. I slipped both my hands down between us & unbuckled his belt. I wanted more. 

I felt his hand cover up mine. He broke our kiss & pulled his face back just a little. 

“Maddy…,” his voice barely a whisper. The shake of his head almost imperceptible.

My eyes searched his but all I saw was lust so I didn’t understand. I gave him a small loving smile & moved my hand lower, gently squeezing his hard shaft through his pants. He blinked slowly & let out a grunt. I lifted my head up & lightly flicked the tip of my tongue against his lips. I squeezed his shaft again. Then again. Then again, until I was doing it rhythmically. He closed his eyes & started to grind in my hand. I kissed his lips softly as I unbuttoned his pants. He responded with equal tenderness to my kiss. As I started to unzip him, his hand once again gently stopped mine. He reopened his eyes, & mixed with the lust, I saw genuine affection.

“Let me make you feel good,” his voice deep & thick.

I had questions but didn’t feel like asking them, all I wanted at that moment was him. I nodded slowly. He kissed me softly but it quickly escalated to a hard passionate kiss. I felt his fingertips stroke the damp crotch of my panties, & after a few moments he began to increase the pressure. I pulled my lips away & let out a groan.

He remained between my legs & moved back on the bed. He lowered his head & nuzzled my panties, pressing his tongue roughly against the thin material. I looked down at him, & as he carefully nipped at me through the white cotton I began to quietly whimper with greedy need.

His eyes immediately shot up to mine & I could see the wicked gleam in his look. He sat up on his knees, lifted up both of my legs & slipped off my panties, tossing them onto his discarded leather jacket. He slid up my naked body & kissed me deeply again. I pulled him tight to me, running my bare feet up & down the sides of his heavy black boots, the feel of the hard cold leather against my bare skin turning me on even more. 

His mouth hovered over mine, his voice barely more than breath, & thick with lust, “Want me to make you cum?”

“Yes...” My voice also barely more than breath.

“Want me to make you cum hard?” His lips brushing against mine.

“Yes… Please, Gordon…” A small quiver in my tone.

He flashed a small grin & slid back down between my open legs. He placed his palms against the inside of my thighs & pushed them wide apart, holding my legs up so that my toes barely grazed the bed. I felt his tongue slide up my wet slit & my back instinctively arched as I grabbed onto the bed sheet. His demanding mouth pressed tightly against my overheated flesh & I moaned as I felt him lick & taste me so intimately. He flicked his tongue quickly against my sensitive clit & I let out a soft cry of pleasure. I lifted my head & looked down at him, my mouth open & my breathing shallow.

He continued flicking & flicking & flicking & all I could do was let out a whimpered, “Fuck…”

I dropped my head back on the bed & couldn’t stop squirming my hips. He rested my legs up on his shoulders & slid his hands under my ass, burying his mouth deep against my hot pink flesh. He closed his lips around my wet clit & began to manipulate it quickly with his insistent tongue, grunting against my tender folds, his strong fingers kneading my ass cheeks roughly.

My hands held the back of his head as I pulled his face even tighter to me. I lifted my head again & looked back down at him.

“Oh, my God, don’t stop…” My voice now nothing but pleading.

He increased the intensity & I couldn’t stop moaning over & over again, “You’re gonna make me fucking cum…”

He wiggled his entire head roughly against me & I felt my orgasm race down my naked body. I let go of his head, dropped back on the bed again, gripped the sheets & cried out loudly as I came hard. 

He lifted up, & when I heard him unzip his pants I looked down at him, moans still escaping my open mouth. He reached into his pants & eased out his erect cock. He gripped his thick shaft & began to stroke himself hard & fast up against me. 

“Oh, fuck...” It was mostly a groan from deep within him rather than words.

He looked up at me, leaned his face towards me & kissed me deeply as he masturbated. I held his face in my hands as I returned his deep kisses. He looked down at his straining cock & let out a guttural grunt.

“Maddy… FUUUCK!” I watched as his orgasm shot out of him in two strong bursts, splashing between my thighs, coating me like melted vanilla ice cream.

He continued to stroke himself for a few moments longer until finally dropping down on top of me, breathing heavily. He rested the side of his damp face between my breasts, drew up his right leg & pulled my left leg high up over his. He kept his right hand on my thigh & gently caressed it.

I wrapped my right leg around his left leg & moved it lazily up & down, enjoying the feel of his pants against my bare skin. I still had questions but didn’t even feel like speaking at that moment. I just wanted to enjoy the quiet closeness with him. 

His breathing slowed, returning to a relaxed pace. I slowly ran my hands back & forth across his back as his hand on my thigh slowed its caressing motion. I watched his eyelids grow heavier & heavier until they finally closed, & after a few minutes he was asleep. 

I let out a soft contented sigh & looked out my bedroom window. Small glistening raindrops were tumbling down the pane. My eyes fell on the pretty “moon flower” Ulli had given me when I first met her, & I smiled. It had bloomed last night again & its’ wonderful ultra soft fragrance still hung in the air.

I looked down at Gordon sleeping peacefully on my chest & lightly grazed my fingertips against the back of his head. I turned my upper half a little towards my nightstand & saw the colorful pinwheel bouquet with their green “stems”, my smile grew wider. 

My own eyelids began to grow wonderfully heavy & I turned off my little nightstand lamp. I snuggled down against Gordon, enjoying the feel of our tangled legs. As my eyes started to close for the final time, I saw my phone flash dimly & silently with an incoming call. I glanced at the time, 3:10 am. It was Chris.


	11. One Bite

Chris. I stared silently at his glowing name on my phone screen. After a few moments, his name dimmed. I continued looking at my phone, my eyes & mind sleepy, & then the notification popped up that he had left a message. He’s never called me after midnight before, & it was now after 3 am. And why tonight? My phone screen went dark again. 

I wrapped my arms tighter around Gordon & looked out my bedroom window at the quiet drizzly night. Although I was highly curious about the voice mail Chris had just left, the thought of listening to it with one of his closest companions sleeping on top of me made me feel...awkward. Since Chris didn’t flag the message as an emergency or urgent, I decided to wait until morning to check it. I closed my tired eyes, & within a few minutes I felt myself being pulled under into the deep dark sea of sleep.

My eyes slowly opened to bright sunlight coming through my bedroom window. I blinked a few times & my gaze fell on the moon-flower plant that sat on the windowsill. Its little fragrant white flowers had closed themselves up & gone back to sleep, dreaming of the next full moon, no doubt. Looking at it always made me smile.

I lazily rolled over & noticed that I was covered up with the top sheet. Gordon was sitting on the edge of the bed, hunched over, looking at his phone, earbuds in both ears. He had an apple in his left hand that had a couple of bites missing & he proceeded to take a third bite, the crunch breaking the early morning stillness in the room. 

“Guten Morgen (Good Morning),” my voice a little raspy.

He didn’t respond & kept watching his phone, chewing. I looked over at the nightstand, picked up the cheerful pinwheel bouquet & waved it at him slowly, like a flag. As he turned his head towards me he smiled & pulled out the right earbud.

“Guten Morgen,” I repeated & smiled back. 

“Guten Morgen,” his voice low & also a little raspy.

I used the “flowers” to motion at his phone, “Something good?”

He looked back at the screen, “Fußball (soccer) game that I missed. I know how it ends, but I want to see why the score was so fucked up, 4 - 1. They’re both strong teams, so what happened.”

He took another bite of the crunchy apple.

“I took one of your apples.” He smiled at me while he chewed.

“Hopefully not the one with the worm in it.” I set the pinwheel bouquet back down on the nightstand. 

He knotted his eyebrows & glanced at the half eaten fruit, “Only half a worm in it now.”

I let out a laugh, “Eww…”

“Here, I’ll be a gentleman & let you have the other half.” He held the apple out to me.

I recoiled & pulled the sheet over my nose, shaking my head.

He leaned towards me grinning & continued to hold out the apple, “C’mon, the worm is nice & chewy, really fresh & plump.”

I drew my knees up to my chest, “Nooo!”

He laughed & took another bite, another loud crunch, & returned to his sitting position. I lowered my anti-worm-sheet-shield from my face & laughed. 

“Take a bite, it’s good.” His tone & smile were upbeat & sincere, & he held the almost gone apple out to me again.

Holding the sheet against my chest, I kneel-walked closer to him. I held onto his hand & took a bite. I sat back on my knees, chewing the cold sweet fruit. His bright eyes roamed my face & he leaned towards me, giving me a deep kiss. When he pulled back, he was slowly chewing half of the bite I’d had in my mouth. I was never a big fan of food swapping during a kiss, but in this instance I didn’t mind at all. 

“I have to get going. I have a couple of things to take care of before work.” His tone & expression were soft as he looked at me. 

I nodded, my tone just as soft, “Ok.”

He rose to his feet, pulling the other earbud out of his ear & placing the phone & buds into the pocket of his leather jacket. He took a final bite of the finished apple & looked around the bedroom quickly while he chewed. I held out my palm & he deposited the core into it with a chipmunk cheek smile. I set the core down on the nightstand & looked back up at him.

He turned & stood directly before me, looking down at me. He reached down with both hands & held my face gently. I straightened upwards but stayed on my knees, resting my hands on his chest, the sheet wrapped around me. 

“I’ll call you later today, before Chris & I go out tonight, ok?” His voice quiet.

I looked into his warm eyes & gave a small nod, matching his tone, “Ok, sounds good." 

He kissed me with a gentle passion, & gave me a sweet smile, “Bis später (Until later).”

I held his gaze for a moment, “Last night...why didn’t you want to...I mean, when I tried to unzip you, you stopped me.” My eyes gently searched his.

He paused for a moment, his hands still holding my face, his thumbs grazing my cheeks back & forth, his voice remaining quiet. 

“Don’t you know?”

I shook my head, “No condom?” It may have sounded like I was joking, but I was being serious.

A small crooked smile crossed his lips, “That wouldn’t have stopped me, not with you.”

He watched my eyes search his face again.

“Because you already belong to someone. And they asked me not to.”

Confusion clouded my face, “There isn’t anyone that wants me.”

And as I thought a little more about what Gordon had just said, another question came to mind.

“If this person asked you not to, then they must have known that you were coming over here last night.”

He lowered his hands from my face & stroked my hair, “The group message last night. I asked you if I could come over & you said yes.”

“But we were the only ones left in the group at that time. Everyone else had logged off.”

He gave a small tender smile, “Not everyone.”

I sat back down on my knees as only one person came to mind, even though it didn’t make any sense to me, & my questioning tone was sincere, “Chris?”

Gordon’s tender expression stayed in place, “I have to go, Maddy.”

He bent down & kissed my forehead, his smile sweet, “I’ll call you later. I’ll let myself out.”

I gave a small nod & watched as he left the bedroom, & a few moments later I heard the front door open & then quietly close. I continued to sit there for a few minutes thinking about what Gordon had just told me, “Because you already belong to someone. And they asked me not to.”

I looked at my phone, picked it up & accessed my voice mail. One short message from Chris, time stamped 3:10 am. He didn’t speak, the only thing I heard was the sound of a tv playing quietly in the background, then after about 20 seconds the call ended. 

I stared at my phone for a few moments & then set it back down. My head was full of questions & yet strangely empty at the same time. I wasn’t sure of anything at that moment, except for one thing, it was 8 am & Chris was expecting me today at 9 am. He was scheduled to do a magazine interview this morning, a radio interview in the afternoon, & Ulli was going to be out of the studio for the day. My usual over thinking & over analyzing would have to wait. 

I jumped in the shower & then quickly got myself ready. I stared at Gordon’s love bite on the side of my neck & tried to cover it with makeup, but that just made it “look like” I was trying to cover it with makeup. Since I had never been fond of turtlenecks for myself, I didn’t own one. But I did, though, have a few scarves. I chose a fairly plain floral one with a simple pattern, nothing anyone would look twice at. I carefully wrapped it loosely around my neck, making sure it covered up the bite, but that it still looked like I wasn’t intentionally covering up anything.

Taking a step back from the mirror, I gave myself a once-over. This was about as good as it was going to get, plus it was already 8:40 am. I threw on my coat, grabbed my messenger bag, phone & keys, & flew out the door. I sprinted down the three flights of stairs, mumbling the entire way, “There better not be traffic...there better not be traffic...there better not be traffic.”

I pulled into the parking lot of the studio &, of course, Chris’ car was already there. I race-walked to the rear security door, punched in the code, swung the heavy steel door open & heard it shut with a heavy thud behind me. The light in the studio was on but the door was partially closed. I stopped for a moment, looked at the time, 9:05 am, & sighed. Good. I took a deep relaxing breath & walked in. 

Chris stood by a table, looking down at a computer screen while sipping from his coffee mug, his other hand in his pants pocket. He wore a pristine three piece black suit, with a crisp black dress shirt, sleek black tie & a pair of beautiful classic black leather Oxfords that were polished to perfection. He was freshly shaved, wore a little dark eyeliner & didn’t have a single hair out of place. My heart actually skipped a beat. He looked absolutely gorgeous. In all the time I’d been working for him, I’d never seen him this dressed up before. An occasional casual coat & tie, if he & Viki were going somewhere after work, yes, but nothing like this. My mouth actually went dry. 

“Guten Morgen (Good morning).” I had to force myself to speak.

He turned & gave me a relaxed smile, “Guten Morgen.”

When Chris had told me about these interviews he was scheduled to do today, he invited me to come along, & I’d happily accepted. Any messages or emails that I needed to return, he & I both agreed, I could easily do from the interview sidelines. 

“I’m ready to go if you are,” my tone & smile cheerful.

He took another sip from his mug & motioned with his head for me to come over to him, his voice as relaxed as his expression.

“Want to hear the first song that’s going to be released from the new album?”

I set my bag down on the couch, my eyes wide with surprise as I went over & stood next to him.

“It’s done?”

His smile grew a little wider & he gave a small nod. He set down his mug, grabbed the back of a rolling office chair, & moved it next to me.

He motioned at the chair with his hand, “Please…”

I sat down & couldn’t hide my excitement. He bent over, clicked a few keys on the computer, & since he was right next to me, I caught his scent as he straightened back up. He wore a light men’s fragrance that was clean but also slightly warm & a little spicy, mixed with a very soft soap & water note. He smelled so good it made my knees weak. I was glad to be sitting. 

After another short moment, the sound of Blutengel’s newest single flooded the studio, & it was breathtaking. Chris’ tremendous musical talents, combined with his & Ulli’s beautiful vocals, created a truly stunning first release from the upcoming album. Chris stood next to me as I sat listening, & I couldn’t stop smiling. 

When the song ended, I looked up at him & actually sighed, “Wow, that is so good!”

A small smile crossed his lips, “So, it’s ok? Not too bad?”

I smirked & glanced back at the computer screen, “Oh, please. It’s gorgeous!”

Chris remained quiet, & I felt his long slender index finger & middle finger gently gather the material of my scarf away from the side of my neck. He ran the sharp tip of a single nail slowly & delicately across Gordon’s bite mark.


	12. Dawn Till Dusk

I froze, electricity shooting up my spine. I swallowed hard & looked up at him. His gaze moved slowly from the bite mark to my face, his expression still relaxed. He pulled his fingers back & carefully arranged the folds of the scarf to their original position.

His voice was low & quiet, but soft, “Do you like being bitten?”

I looked into his serious blue eyes & it felt as if time had stopped. The song had ended & the room was still. He watched my mouth as I spoke. 

“Yes, I… But I’ve never...had one like this before.” My hand gingerly touched the scarf. 

His hypnotic eyes held my gaze & I couldn’t look away.

“It’s quite an intense one, very dark. There are still some teeth marks.” His tone low, his accent soft, seductive.

My lips parted as if to say something, but my voice failed.

“Must have been a very passionate moment.” 

His eyes remained locked on mine & I could see the slow burn of something just a touch sexual, just a whisper darker, just a whisper animalistic.

I could feel the heat rising up the back of my neck & settling in my cheeks as my mind randomly flashed amorous scenes from last night, like watching someone play 52 Pickup with a deck of naughty playing cards. And I still couldn’t look away from those bewitching blue eyes.

“We should get going,” a small smile on his lips.

He released his gaze from me, & I blinked a few times as if being woken from a spell. 

“Um..yeah, yes.” My voice sounded faint & felt disconnected from me, & I wasn’t 100% sure if I was responding to his comment about “getting going” or the “passionate moment”.

He walked over to the coat rack & removed a beautiful knee length, black wool coat. He slipped it on, adjusted the collar, & left it unbuttoned. I had to admit, even through my “haze”, he looked amazing, literally the definition of tall, dark & handsome, & he could easily put men half his age to shame. After shutting off the room lights, he waited by the door as I grabbed my bag, & then he locked up the studio behind us. 

As we left the building & crossed the parking lot to his car, we were both quiet. But it was that intriguing comfortable quiet we’d always had with each other since day one. He pulled out his car keys, unlocked the doors, & held the passenger door open for me. I slid the messenger bag off my shoulder & he held his hand out to me just the way he did that first day I’d met him. I handed it to him silently & he took it from me silently as he watched my face. He set the bag down on the backseat as I sat down, then he gently shut the door.

As I fastened my seat belt, I noticed the interior of his car was as spotless as the exterior. He opened the driver’s door & held the right side of his unbuttoned coat against his body as he slid into his seat. He shut his door, set the locks & started the ignition. The engine came to life with a deep purr. He put on his seat belt, checked the mirrors & shifted into reverse. 

Turning his upper half slightly towards me, he glanced at me, placed his right hand on the back of my seat, looked out the rear window & slowly turned the steering wheel with the palm of his left hand, easing his sexy ride out of the parking spot. He shifted gears & we were on our way, all done with that curious silence between us. Not one word spoken. Only a few exchanged glances. And that, combined with the sleek, dominant, yet quiet self confidence he so effortlessly exuded, had me slightly aroused. 

And now I was off, to spend the entire day with this impeccably dressed, sinfully handsome, great smelling, provocatively charming man. I smirked a little internally. Could I find any additional ways to describe him? And what about Gordon alluding that Chris had asked him to not be fully intimate with me? I assume that’s information I’m not supposed to know. I sighed quietly & looked out the passenger window.

“Everything ok?” Chris’ sweet voice breaking the silence.

I looked over at him & smiled.

“Yeah, everything’s good.” My tone relaxed.

The corner of his mouth curled up into a little smile-smirk, & he looked out the windshield again as he spoke.

“When a man asks a woman that question, & the woman answers, ‘yeah, everything’s good’, everything is usually not good.” His tone gently teasing.

I kept my eyes on him as he drove, & my smile grew a little wider at his “man wisdom”. I lowered my eyes, but a small smile remained. I looked out the windshield & my expression became a touch more serious. Chris was quiet & I knew he was giving me a chance to collect my thoughts, either on his astute observation or on what was really on my mind.

“I guess you know that Gordon stayed at my place last night,” my tone soft, but not apologetic or guilt ridden.

Chris remained quiet, both of our eyes watching the traffic ahead of us.

“Things…became a little romantic, but he wouldn’t...he didn’t… I didn’t understand why.”

“I asked him not to.” He said it slowly, his voice relaxed, low.

I looked at him, my gaze gentle. Hearing him admit to what Gordon had only implied caused a tender ache to pass through my heart.

He came to a stop at a red light & looked at me, his serious eyes searched mine. I gave him a small soft smile but didn’t say anything. Yes. I could’ve asked, “why”. But I wasn’t a naive child anymore. And I didn’t need to have a fine point put on his admission.

The light turned green & he turned his attention back to the traffic. As he drove, his right hand rested on the gearshift between us. I reached down with my left hand & gently took a hold of his ring finger & little finger, giving them a light acknowledging squeeze. 

I watched his face. He glanced down for a moment, briefly touching the tip of his tongue to his upper lip, then looked out the windshield again. He slowly curled the rest of his long fingers around my hand & squeezed lightly back. We listened to the radio & stayed in our comfortable silence for the remainder of the drive, our hands gently clasped. 

We arrived at the interview location on time & I was surprised, & excited, to see that it was being held at the film studio where part of Blutengel’s new music video would be shot. The magazine’s writer who would be doing the interview, & the magazine’s photographer, had set up the interview site on one of the cool looking partially completed sets.

After Chris had introduced me to everyone, I bowed out & discreetly took a seat at a row of tables off to the side. I was easily out of the line of sight from all the photos being taken, but I was still close enough to where I could see & hear everything. And since I didn’t have too many messages to return this morning, I was able to watch most of the interview, & it was a lot of fun.

Once the interview was over, everyone took a break as the photographer & his assistant re-staged the lighting on part of the set. After everyone had a little breather, there were going to be a few more pictures taken for the band’s, & Out Of Lines’ promotional purposes, then Chris was done. 

While Chris took some impromptu photos with the magazine staff, I wandered over to the craft services table & looked over all the goodies. I’d only had that one bite of Gordon’s "worm apple" & I was hungry. There were all kinds of yummy looking munchies & I decided to try these mini bite size quiche looking things. At least, that’s what I hoped they were. There weren’t any ID labels on the food, except a few of the offerings had a little card in front of them warning of peanuts or strawberries, I assume for allergy purposes. 

Since I wasn’t positive that it was a mini quiche, & since I didn’t know what it would taste like, I just put one on a paper plate. I looked around for utensils & saw a plastic cup full of plastic spoons, but strangely enough no forks. I took a discreet sniff of the little pastry & my mouth began to water, plus it had been sitting over a chafing dish & was still warm. 

I took a small bite, a couple of chews, & still couldn’t positively say that it was a quiche, but boy was it good, whatever it was. I shoved the other half in my mouth & my appetite went into full “go” mode. The second & third one were already on my plate before I even finished devouring the first one. I set my plate down only long enough to grab & open a small bottle of apple juice. After taking a couple of sips, I set my hungry attention fully back on my plate of buttery, eggy, savory little lovelies.

While my mouth was still busy chewing on the second quiche-look-alike, I picked up a third one & took a bite. Suddenly Chris’ large, well manicured hand appeared holding my apple juice out to me. I stopped chewing, my mouth full of food, plate in my left hand, half ravaged mini quiche imposter in my right, & I looked up at him.

He stared down at me with a humorous look on his face, “Are they good?” 

I nodded slowly & started chewing again. I returned the half eaten pastry to my plate & then set the plate down on the table. As I chewed, I quickly scanned the table for napkins. Chris’s other, equally well manicured hand appeared, holding one out to me. Smiling, my cheeks stuffed with eggy goodness, I took the napkin & juice from him. His playful eyes stayed silently on me as I swallowed & wiped my mouth. He raised both well defined eyebrows & gave a little gesture towards the juice bottle as if reminding me to take a sip before I choke. I took a small drink & wiped my mouth again. 

“I didn’t eat anything this morning,” my sheepish smile in place.

Chris picked up a paper plate & placed a couple of the mini quiches on it.

“Plus, with working up an appetite overnight & everything…” His tone soft & as playful as his gaze.

He popped a whole pastry into his mouth, keeping his sparkling blue eyes on me as he slowly chewed. I felt my face get hot & I knew I was blushing. A gently teasing, but knowing smile crossed his lips as he finished chewing. He set his plate down & stepped close to me.

“Gordon’s a lucky man,” his voice almost a whisper, meant only for my ears.

I lifted my eyes back up to him & felt my cheeks start to cool down. His eyes moved easily over my face, his expression sincere. 

“I’m lucky, too.” My voice also quiet. 

“Chris, wenn Sie bereit sind (when you’re ready).” It was the photographer.

Chris turned his head & gave him a friendly look, “Danke (Thank you).”

He turned back to me, reaching down & picking up the other half of the mini quiche that I had set down on my plate. He offered it to me & I held out my palm. He looked into my eyes & shook his head once, very slightly, he didn’t hand me the remaining bite. I lowered my palm & paused for a moment, then slowly opened my mouth. He held the savory morsel delicately between his thumb & index finger, but didn’t extend his hand to me. I looked at the little bite, then lifted my eyes back up to his as I moved my face towards his hand, carefully taking the pastry from his fingers with my mouth, chewing slowly. He watched me for a moment, then reached down & picked up the remaining whole one from his plate, popping it in his mouth, giving the tips of his thumb & index finger a quick lick. He chewed & pointed to the metal pan that contained the rest of the delicious mini pastries.

“No more. We’re going to lunch after this, a nice place. I want you hungry when we get there.” 

I smiled, “No more.”

He pursed his lips playfully. He picked up my apple juice, took a couple of sips & put the bottle back down.

“It shouldn’t be much longer.” 

He shot me a quick smile & headed back to the set. As before with the sit down interview, it was fun watching the promotional photo shoot. And as always, it was fascinating to watch Chris transition so easily between a sweet expression, a serious one, a sexy look, & back again.

In less than an hour, he was done & we were on our way to lunch. The weather had turned a little since this morning, & even though it remained mostly sunny it was noticeably colder. The drive to the restaurant wasn’t long, & because Chris had made reservation we were seated at our table less than 30 minutes from leaving the interview. 

And he was right, it was a nice place, a very nice place. The kind of place with plush private booths made of dark wood & supple leather, & intimate tables for two, with crisp white linen table cloths & petite glass vases holding a single perfect fragrant red rose. The kind of place where the lighting was soft, conversations were hushed, & secret kisses were discreetly stolen between whispering couples. With the way Chris was dressed today, he fit right in. With the way I was dressed today, simple skirt, plain pullover, dark tights, uninteresting shoes & my failed “camouflage” scarf, I felt a little out of place. But I refused to let him know this. He took us to such a nice place, & took the time to make reservations, I wasn’t about to be a real life Debbie Downer.

As usual, our lunch conversation was pleasant & two hours had flown by before we knew it. Chris’ second interview was at a radio station & scheduled to begin in about 40 minutes. We left the restaurant & made the trip to the station with time to spare. Sitting on the sidelines of the radio interview was even more fun than the earlier magazine one because the whole feel of this Q & A session was more easy going & looser. Maybe it was because there were fewer people around or because there weren’t going to be any photos taken, aside from a few personal ones between the DJ’s & Chris. But Chris also seemed to be enjoying this one more, not that he didn’t enjoy the first interview, but now he seemed more laid back & “open”, & some of his responses were truly funny & even I couldn’t help laughing out loud, along with the DJ’s.

The interview wrapped up with Chris taking some casual photos with the station staff & with some fans that had been waiting outside the radio station building, & he was as gracious & charming with them as always. 

By the time we got back to the car in was after 5 pm. As Chris sat down, he received a call from Gordon informing him that he’d have to take a rain check on them going out tonight for drinks. His long-time on again, off again girlfriend was apparently interested in possibly being “on again”, & she wanted to get together with him tonight to talk about things. Chris told Gordon he understood, & for his friend to do what he felt he needed to do. He then held out his phone to me.

I gave Chris a questioning look & took the phone, “Hello?”

“Maddy… I guess Chris just told you what’s going on with me tonight.” His tone was gentle.

“Yes, he did. I hope you two can work things out.” My sentiment was truly sincere, they’d been together for a long time, regardless of the whole on-off thing, & at the end of the day they loved each other, no matter how often they broke up. But I still noticed a funny little pull in my heart.

“Thank you. Last night was special to me.” 

“Me, too.” My voice was more quiet than I expected.

“It wasn’t just a one-night-stand thing to me. I mean that. I hope you know that.”

“I do. I do know that.”

“I hope so, because it’s the truth, & I would never lie to you.”

Chris watched my face carefully, & I began to tear up a little. Damn it. 

“I know you wouldn’t.”

“Good. I have to go. The traffic light has been green for almost an hour now & the asshole in front of me still hasn’t noticed. I’m about to change that.”

I laughed softly, “Ok, but be nice.”

“I’m always nice.” 

I heard him lean heavily on his car horn, “See? No bad words, no bad fingers.”

I laughed quietly again, “I’m proud of you. Ok, get going. Hang up & drive safely.”

“I will. I’ll probably see you at the studio in the next day or two, ok?” His tone still gentle.

“Ok. Goodnight, Gordon.”

“Goodnight, who?” A touch of playfulness in his voice.

“Gordon.”

“Who?”

I looked up at Chris, his expression serious & with sincere concern over my somewhat teary state. I gave him a little “I’m ok” smile & nod.

“Goodnight, Gordy Gordon.”

Chris sighed & smirked, silently mouthing “Gordy Gordon”. He rolled his eyes.

Gordon laughed softly, “Goodnight, Maddy Madeline. And tell that fucker sitting next to you to stop rolling his eyes.”

I chuckled softly, “Ciao.”

“Ciao.”

I handed the phone back to Chris & quickly wiped away two tiny tears that had managed to escape. He slipped his phone into the pocket of his coat, removed a small box of tissues from the center console between our seats, & held it out to me, soft concern still in his eyes.

My smile was a little embarrassed as I pulled out a tissue, “Thanks, but I’m ok, really, just being silly.” I dabbed at my eyes, the waterworks ceasing.

Chris returned the tissue box to the console. He watched my face for a moment longer & gave me a warm smile, his expression understanding. He started the engine & drove us out of the radio station parking lot. 

“How about a little treat before we head home. I know a nice place where we can, you know, sort of relax. And they have ice cream.”

I looked over at him, his smile sweet.

I thought back over why I had just teared up. And as ridiculous as it was, I felt as if I’d just been dumped, as if Gordon had just broken up with me. But there was nothing to be dumped or broken up from, & rationale me knew that. He & I were friends, & still were friends, & I was lucky to have him in my life. If my patched up heart subconsciously was envisioning something more to develop from last night, then that fell solely on my shoulders, & not his. I knew why he wanted to see me. I knew why I said “yes”. I knew that he & his girlfriend would eventually get back together. I knew everything. And I had indulged in my little pity party enough. 

“Ice cream sounds perfect.” I mirrored back his sweet expression.

He drove us to a local park that had a pretty duck pond & plenty of people friendly, hungry ducks. There was a snack kiosk at the entrance to the park, & he bought us a couple of ice creams & a bag of “duck food”, basically a small brown paper sack of shredded day old bread. He folded up the bag & placed it in his coat pocket while pulling out a pair of simple black leather gloves. It was sunny but there was a bite in the air, & I followed his example & put on my gloves, too. 

We strolled lazily, our conversation easy & casual, eating our frozen treats, because as everyone knows, it’s never too cold for ice cream. After a couple of slow laps around the park, we made our way to the pond. As soon as the ducks saw us approach, they made a beeline across the water towards us, feet paddling quickly, little feathery butts wiggling. 

Chris removed the paper bag of torn bread pieces from his coat pocket as the hungry birds stormed the shore, quacking loudly. He took a small handful of bread & then handed me the bag. We took turns tossing the pieces to them, & they looked cute as they waddled hurriedly back & forth between us. The little ones always trailed the bigger faster adults, but Chris figured out a plan. He crouched down, & as I lured the adults over to me with larger pieces, he tore the pieces he held into even smaller pieces & laid them out away from the bigger birds, making sure the fledglings also got their fill.

I quietly watched him there, crouched close to the ground, in his beautiful suit & black wool coat, his black gloved hands feeding the baby birds, his handsome face at ease & his smile relaxed. I couldn’t help but also smile.

Once all the bread was gone, we walked back to his car. It was almost 7 pm, & it was almost dark. The traffic wasn’t too bad & the drive back to my building was easy. As he pulled up to the curb, it hit me like a lightning bolt.

“My car!” I blurted it out. “It’s at the studio.”

“It’s ok, I can just pick you up in the morning. I’ve had my car there overnight. It’ll be fine.” His tone & expression were reassuring & confident.

“Ok, that sounds good then. Thank you.” 

He gave a small courteous nod.

“I guess if no one messed with your beautiful car, then no one’s going to give my hoopty a second glance.” I chuckled.

He knotted his eyebrows a bit, “Hoopty?”

“Yeah, you know, an older car, kind of beat up, the body needs noticeable work & nothing anyone in their right mind would ever want to steal. A hoopty.” I grinned.

His slim sharp brows remained knotted & he made “duck lips”, “Hoopty.”

“Hoopty!” I repeated it cheerfully. 

He let out a laugh & shook his head, I laughed, too.

“I better get going. Thank you for letting me tagalong today, I had a lot of fun. And thank you also for the wonderful lunch, that restaurant was beautiful. Oh, & the ice cream, too.”

He narrowed his eyes & gently shook his head, “No need to say ‘thank you’. You made the day fun for me, too.” 

I smiled, “Ok, then I’ll see you in the morning.”

His sparkling eyes moved slowly across my face.

“I think I’m the only one that hasn’t seen your apartment yet. Would love to take a quick look if you have time?” His voice low but upbeat.

I paused for a moment. It was true, he was the only one of my friends that hadn’t seen it yet. I’d invited him & Viki over a couple of times for dinner, but Viki was the only one that could make it because Chris & Mario had a couple of unexpected production issues come up at the last minute. 

I also suddenly felt the presence of inner Adult Maddy weighing heavily on my shoulder. She remained silent, though. But she really didn’t need to say a single word.

I looked into his eyes, “Um, sure. Now’s a good time. It’s still early.”

He shut off the ignition & we exited his car. We made our way up to the 3rd floor & stopped in front of my door as I dug out my keys.

“You have a nice building,” his low voice coming from behind me.

As I turned the key in the lock & opened the door, I looked at him over my shoulder with a soft smile, “Thanks.”

I stepped inside & turned to face him, noticing that he was still standing outside the door. He kept his deep blue eyes on me as he pulled off his gloves. 

“Please, come in.” 

He placed his leather gloves in the pocket of his coat, his eyes still on me. As he stepped into my apartment for the first time, an eerie thought came to me. In European folklore, a vampire cannot enter a home without the owner’s direct invitation. Without that invitation, the vampire is literally incapable of crossing the home’s threshold, thereby incapable of entering that home in any way, or form. But once that invitation has been extended to the vampire, he will no longer require a second, & will be able to come & go from that home freely from then on. The invitation, also once extended, cannot be rescinded, even by the owner of the home. A little shiver crawled up my spine as I shut the door behind him. A shiver that wasn’t completely unpleasant.

I set down my messenger bag & led him around my little place starting with the kitchen, the beautiful hand carved, wooden good luck pig that Viki had given me displayed on the kitchen counter. Next, was a peak at my bathroom, with the very pretty under-sink cabinet that Gordon had bought for me, & also installed himself, as a housewarming gift. After that, I took Chris into the decently sized living room, where his housewarming gift was displayed. A gorgeous, perpetual motion mantle clock. It was housed in a sheer glass case, with brass accents, & brass numbers & arms on a white clock face. It chimed softly every hour. Mario’s housewarming gift was also there on the coffee table. A big wonderful photography book, a photo history of the part of Berlin that my building was in, going back to before my street had even been developed. Last but not least, I showed him the cozy bedroom, the bed taking up most of the space in the little room. There were also two small nightstands, a slim wardrobe, & a little three drawer, mirrored dresser. I had placed Gordon’s sweet pinwheel bouquet in a clear vase filled with aqua colored glass beads, to resemble water. Chris agreed that his “flowers” were a cute idea. When he saw Ulli’s moon-flower plant, he bent over & gave the closed buds a sniff, mentioning that their lovely delicate fragrance was still noticeable, even while they were “sleeping”.

“Well, that’s about it.” I smiled, “Can I get you anything? A beer, some coffee?”

He gently shook his head, “I’m good. Thank you.” His voice quiet. 

He followed me as I led him back to the front door & held it open for him.

“I know you usually get to the studio in the morning about an hour before me, so do you wanna pick me up around 8:30 or so? I can be ready as early as you need me to be.”

Chris stood next to the entrance looking down at me. That deep slow burn from this morning back in his gaze. That whisper of something darker, of something animalistic, back in the deep blue of his eyes.

I slowly moved my eyes to his hand as he placed his palm on the door, gently shutting it.


	13. Halo On Fire

As the door closed with a soft “click” I looked back up to his face. There was a seriousness there mixed with something delicately seductive. He took a couple of small steps towards me & I took a couple of steps back. He took one more half step forward & I felt the door against my back. I kept my eyes on his face as his dark gaze roamed slowly up & down the front of me. 

He reached down & took a hold of my hands, placing both of my palms on either side of the buttons on his vest. I watched his fingers as he undid the top button on his vest, & then he moved his hands away from mine. He took another half step towards me, the space between us quickly disappearing. I looked up at his face for a moment, then back at my hands resting on his chest. I moved my fingers tentatively towards the next button down & brushed the tip of my index finger against it. 

His hands came back up to mine & he unfastened the second button. He gently took hold of my hands again & slid them down to the third button. I raised my head & looked back up at him. His eyes were dark as he watched my face, but they still sparkled in the low light of the entryway. I kept my eyes on his as I carefully undid the third button, his nostrils flaring slightly, & I felt his chest rise with a silent intake of breath. 

He lowered his face next to mine & lightly brushed his nose against my temple, I could hear him exhale softly. I turned my face faintly towards his as he placed one palm on either side of me against the door. 

“The next one.” He lifted his face a bit, his lips barely touching my temple, his voice low & hushed, & it wasn’t a suggestion.

My palms still rested against him & my fingers slid down to the fourth button. I looked down at my fingers & felt him tilt his head down as he also watched my hands. As I released the fourth button he let out a very soft breathy groan, & that sensual sound made my pulse quicken.

“Again.” Same low, throaty tone.

Both of our eyes on my gliding palms as I unfastened the fifth button. 

“One more.” 

My fingers traveled down to the last button. I gently ran my thumb across it & felt him nod slowly against my temple. I pulled it carefully free, & his beautifully tailored black vest fell open. His slightly open mouth glided feathery light & exquisitely slow down the side of my face, across my cheek, towards my mouth. 

My mind was moving a million miles a second. My head a cacophony of sirens, alarms & warning bells. Every dream, fantasy & dirty thought I’d ever had about him all crashing together with his intoxicating scent & the sheer power of his dominant presence. His mouth so close to mine I could feel the heat from him against my lips. Inner Adult Maddy frantically waving her arms & shouting to be heard above the din of all the scolding, berating voices in my head. As his soft lips brushed against the corner of my mouth & his warm breath began to mingle with mine, I felt myself tumbling off a precipice. He held his slightly open mouth just a heartbeat above mine. A tiny, almost silent whimper slipped out of me. As soon as he heard it, he pressed his silky lips gently against mine. I was in full freefall. The halo I always thought I secretly wore burst into flames before my eyes. The pure white angel wings I always thought I secretly had turned coal black. And as his probing tongue found mine, I submitted fully to my long aching desire for him.

I raised up as tall as I could & kissed him back with the same soft passion his warm mouth bestowed upon mine, my hands languidly sliding up his belly to his chest. After a few minutes of sultry kisses he pulled back, removing his hands from the door, & stared down at me.

“Show me your bedroom again.” His voice slightly thick, & as before, he wasn’t asking.

My eyes roaming over his sexy face. I took a couple of steps away from him, turned to face him, & took a few slow steps backwards in the direction of my bedroom. He slowly advanced towards me, his eyes holding me tight. I turned to face forward again & slipped off my coat as I entered the bedroom, the soles of his shoes tapping on the wooden floor of the entryway as he followed. 

Only one of the little nightstand lamps was lit, bathing the room in a soft light. I set my coat down on the bed & turned to face him. He took off his coat, placed it over mine, & sat down at the foot of the bed. He reached for my waist & gently pulled me between his long legs. I rested my hands on his shoulders & watched his face as his blue eyes moved up & down my body. His hands caressed my hips & the outside of my thighs before sliding to my ass, giving it a firm squeeze. A soft grunt escaped my lips. 

His eyes looked into mine & I could see the growing lust in them as he gave the cheeks of my ass another hard squeeze. Another quiet grunt slipping out from me at the feel of his large strong hands. I ran my hands up & down his chest & pushed the unbuttoned vest off his broad shoulders, watching it slip down his upper arms. He slid his arms out of it & pushed it aside. 

He tilted his head slightly to one side as his eyes fell on my neck, & used both hands to carefully undo my scarf, setting it down next to him. He placed his entire right palm on my throat & tenderly stroked it. My mouth opened slightly as I exhaled softly. He ran his long fingers over Gordon’s love bite, delicately dragging his sharp fingernails back & forth across the dark mark. I shivered & gasped at the sensation of his nails moving across the still sensitive bite. His deep blue eyes lit up with an inner fire at my gasp, his mouth opening just a bit. 

He glided his hand to the back of my neck & pulled me forward, covering the love bite with his open mouth. I let out a whimper & grabbed onto his upper arms as I felt him gently bite the same area. His left hand moved to my lower back & he held me tight to him as he began to suck on the same spot, that familiar jolt of pleasure & pain lighting up my body. The sensation was almost overwhelming & caused me to involuntarily struggle a bit. 

His hold tightened on my back & neck as he let out a low moan against my throat. I whimpered louder but stopped struggling as I let go of his arms, placing my hands gently on the back of his head, moving my fingers through his soft hair. I closed my eyes, breathing him in, & allowed him to take his pleasure. 

His left hand firmly caressed my lower back, & it felt good. His right hand did the same to the back of my neck, & it felt equally as good. He continued to hold me tight to him, & once I stopped struggling, all I felt was safe in his strong embrace. 

I felt him release his mouth & tight hold on me as he slowly pulled his face back. He slid his hand down from my neck & rested it on my lower back next to his other hand. I opened my eyes, my eyelids feeling heavy but not sleepy. He leaned his face forward & took my lower lip gently between his, giving it a few delicate nips.

He pulled his face back again, his mouth still slightly open, a hunger in his eyes as he locked them onto my eyes. He took a hold of my hand & pressed it against the crotch of his pants, the growing bulge overflowing my palm. I began to caress him through the material, not moving my longing eyes from his. His mouth opened a little wider as he held my gaze. Both of his hands moved down to my ass & he kneaded it in the same rhythm that I caressed him. 

My mouth also involuntarily opened a bit as I rubbed him a little more firmly, feeling the outline of his thickening shaft strain the black material of his pants. His hands slid down the back of my thighs & slid back up along the inside, pushing my skirt up to the top of my thighs. His hands jumped back to my ass, kneading it firmly again, then traveled again down the back of my thighs & back up the inside, again pushing my skirt up. 

I brought my mouth as close to his as I could without touching his lips. The tip of his glistening tongue poked out, wiggling as if urging me to come closer. I gave it a teasing lick with the tip of my tongue & he stuck his out further, continuing to wiggle it lasciviously. I gave it a few more teasing licks until he pressed his mouth tight to mine, kissing me deeply, passionately. 

Both of my hands traveled up his body to his shoulders. I broke our kiss, both of us breathing more heavily, & undid his sleek black tie, dropping it on the bed next to my scarf. My fingers then went to the collar button of his black dress shirt, unbuttoning it, & the next button down, & the third one down from that. I nuzzled the side if his neck, his skin warm & soft, & gently nibbled on him. He turned his head to the side & offered his neck to me. That simple gesture of his aroused me immensely & I couldn’t help turning my nibble into a tender bite. 

He moaned softly & grabbed the bottom of my ass, pulling me up & tight to him again. I bit a little harder, licking his skin, tasting him. He moaned louder, my fingers moving up the back of his head, through his dark hair. My mouth glided to his ear & I nibbled on it softly.

As I went back & forth between kissing his neck & ear, his fingers undid the single button on my skirt & then he carefully unzipped it, letting it fall around my ankles. I stepped out of it & pushed it aside with my shoe. He ran his hands, with his long fingers spread wide, up & down my legs over my dark tights. My mouth found his mouth again & we kissed deeply once more. 

The palm of his right hand slid between my legs, cupping the crotch of my tights. His thumb pressed firmly against the two layers of material covering my hidden clit, & he began to wiggle his thumb from side to side as he continued to kiss me. I involuntarily lifted up on my toes, releasing a soft moan into his mouth. He held my ass with his left hand as his right thumb increased the speed & pressure. 

I pulled my face back & gasped softly. His eyes locked onto mine, he lifted his slim eyebrows & gave a slow nod, his mouth partially open, as if silently saying “doesn’t that feel good?” I nodded back at him, but a little more quickly. A small lewd smile crept across his face. He stopped moving his thumb & a disappointed mew escaped my lips. His lewd smile grew wider, fire in his eyes. He took a hold of the waistband of my tights & pulled them down to my ankles. I quickly stepped out of my shoes, & then out of my tights, pushing them both to the side with my bare foot, next to my discarded skirt. His hands quickly came back up, pulling down my black panties, & they fell to my ankles. I also stepped out of them, pushing them aside. All I had left on was my bra & pullover sweater. 

His silky hands roamed freely & eagerly over the bare skin of my legs & ass. He gave me a quick passionate kiss & then turned me around so that my back was facing him. He pulled my hips back against him & sat me down on the edge of the bed, between his wide spread legs. He tucked my hips tightly back against the very noticeable bulge in his pants & placed my right leg over his right thigh. 

Wrapping his left arm around my waist, he ran the fingers of his right hand repeatedly up & down my heated slit. I tilted my head back against his shoulder & moaned. He kissed & nipped at my ear as his fingers continued to stroke me. Slipping his long slender index finger between my wet folds, he gently rubbed my sensitive clit causing my back to arch. I moaned louder & grabbed onto his thighs. He added his middle finger to the motion of his index finger & I groaned, my ass lifting off the bed. With his left arm low around my waist, he held me firmly down & pulled my ass back against his crotch again. Both of his experienced fingers now rhythmically rubbing my excited little button. I let go of his thighs, raised both my arms, reached back & wrapped them around his neck, grinding my ass roughly against his restrained cock. 

“Fuck, yesss…” His voice low, thick & sexy.

His fingers increased their pace & intensity. I turned my face towards his & he kissed me greedily, his long tongue stroking mine. My hands held the back of his head, my back arched, as I continued rolling my hips against his crotch. He let go of my waist, pushed up my pullover with his left hand & tugged down the front of my black bra, my breasts spilling out. 

He & I both looked down at his hand as he caressed both of my breasts, his fingertips gently pinching & pulling at my hard nipples. I bit my lower lip & moaned, grabbing a handful of hair on the back of his head. His hand moved from my chest to my jaw & he turned my face towards his, locking his mouth onto mine, kissing me deeply. His hand then traveled down to my left leg as he firmly raked his sharp nails across the inside of my thigh, at the same time parting my legs wider. 

His demanding tongue slid deeper into my mouth as the middle finger of his right hand trailed down from my clit to my wet opening. He drew tiny circles around the outside of it with the tip of his finger, his pointed nail occasionally making contact with the delicate area & sending a tiny jolt of electricity through my belly. He pulled his mouth from mine, looked down at his hand between my legs, & slowly inserted his long middle finger inside me. I let out a soft grunt & looked down also, watching his finger slide in up to the middle knuckle. He exhaled audibly & pulled his finger almost completely back out, stopping at the tip. I mewed softly as I watched his hand. He slid his finger back in just as slowly, but this time all the way up to the knuckle on his hand, & we both let out a soft groan but for different reasons.

He moved his middle finger in & out slowly a few times & then began to do it more quickly & harder. We both kept our eyes on his hand as I whimpered louder, my right hand holding the back of his neck, my left still wrapped in his hair. He increased the speed & intensity, & my ass rocked back even harder against his trapped cock. 

“Oh, fuck..,” was all I could squeak out.

Turning his face to mine, he bit gently at my ear, & placed the tips of his index finger & middle finger of his left hand over my clit, rubbing quickly. I dropped my head back against his shoulder, gripped the back of his neck with my right hand & pulled his hair with my left hand. He continued to drive the middle finger of his right hand in & out of me roughly. 

“Oh, shit..,” fell from my lips in a frenzied mumble.

He kissed my cheek repeatedly, occasionally giving the corner of my mouth a quick lick.

“Cum for me.” His tone low & lusty.

I nodded quickly, my mind nothing but a blur of pleasure. 

“Yeahhh, yeahhh..,” my gasps pleading.

“That’s it, baby..,” a delicious lewdness to his voice.

His fingers relentlessly pushing me to the edge.

“Mmhmm!” An acknowledging closed mouth squeal escaping from me.

He ran his tongue up my cheek to my temple. My orgasm shot through me like lightning.

“Chris! Ohhh, fuck!” I yelped loudly, dropping my hands to his forearms, grabbing him tight.

“Fuck! Yes yes yes yes yes, mmmmm…” His voice a deep sensual purr against my temple.

I looked down at his slowing fingers, whimpering softly.

“Mmmmm… You came so beautifully.” He nuzzled my ear, then kissed my lips softly.

I returned his gentle kiss, moaning quietly into his warm mouth. He moved his face back slowly, a sweet but still lewd smile on his lips. He looked down at his hands as he eased his middle finger from me, slipping it into his mouth, licking it a few times. Pulling it back out of his mouth, he held it out to me & I wrapped my lips around it. 

His gaze moved between watching my mouth & watching my eyes, as I slid my lips suggestively back & forth the entire length of his slender finger. His nostrils flared as he pulled his finger out of my mouth, replacing it with his tongue in a sensual kiss. 

I broke our kiss & stood up, turning to face him. His amorous eyes looked me over from head to toe, then came to rest on my face. I gave him a tender smile & pulled off my sweater & bra, letting them drop to the floor. Reaching up, I removed the clip that had held my hair up in a relaxed bun all day & tossed it onto my dresser. The flame in his blue eyes grew brighter as he watched me. 

I crouched down & untied the laces of his polished black Oxfords, slipping them off his feet. I pulled off his socks, placed them in his shoes & slid the beautiful shoes under my bed.

“I guess this means you’re not kicking me out tonight?” His voice soft & a touch playful.

I glanced up at him with a gentle smirk. At that moment, even with a lusty flame still unquenched & burning brightly in his eyes, his face expressed just a hint of shyness. Unbelievable.

“No. I’m not kicking you out tonight.” My voice & smile as softly playful as his. 

I rose back up between his legs & stepped close to him. He gently but firmly ran his hands up & down my naked body. I pulled his shirt out of his pants & unbuttoned it fully. Taking a hold of one of his wrists, I unfastened the button on his cuff, then doing the same to his other cuff. 

He suddenly wrapped his arms around me, turned his upper half to the side, & pushed me back on the bed. He stood up, knelt on the bed & moved me up higher so that my head rested on a pillow.

“I have to adjust you, you’re too low.” He gave me a teasing smirk.

I let out a soft laugh, “I like how you adjust me.”

“You do?” His words bathed in that sexy lewd tone . 

He pushed my legs wide apart & lay down between them on his stomach. I nodded down at him in response to his playful question. He slid his hands under my thighs, each of his thumbs pressing against my inner thighs.

“Then you’re going to really like this.” 

He ran the flat of his tongue up my wet slit, parting it with the tip of his tongue. He pressed his eager mouth tight to my delicate pink folds, licking me intensely. I let out a groan & lifted my hips up to him. My fingers roamed through his soft hair & I closed my eyes, losing myself in his erotic kiss. His long tongue focused on my opening, teasing it with tickling licks & then sliding in & out, over & over again. I moaned loudly & pulled his hair roughly. His long nails dug into my thighs & I grunted. He wiggled his tongue back up to my tender clit & lavished it with special attention. I drew my knees up, arched my back & cried out as I came for a second time.

“Oh, my God, Chris, fuuuckkk…” My voice trailing off in bliss. 

His mouth slowed, & he gave the delicate area feathery kisses. I rested my head on the pillow & looked down at him. I couldn’t help but smile. He slid up the side of my body until we were face to face, & he kissed me gently. As we kissed, I reached down & unbuckled his belt. He ran his fingertips across the side of my face, kissing me more passionately. I unbuttoned his pants & unzipped him, pressing my body against him, gently coaxing him onto his back.

He lay back fully, his shirt open, his head on the pillow, & continued to kiss me slowly, his hands caressing my face. I ran my hand lazily up his belly to his chest, & back down again, repeating the motion several times. The next time my hand came down, I slipped it inside his pants & eased out his big cock. He groaned into my mouth & pulled his face back, his eyes again dark with lust. He looked down & watched as my hand lightly stroked his hard shaft. 

He licked his kiss swollen lips & moaned quietly, keeping his eyes on my hand. I leaned up & tenderly kissed his forehead, then each eyelid, his nose, each cheek, & finally his square chin. He lifted his eyes to mine & blinked slowly, his dark lashes soft looking. His hand gently took a hold of mine, moving it a little quicker on his thick shaft, & I could see the need in his wide eyes.

I gave his length a firm squeeze & he let out a deep groan, laying his head back down on the pillow. I stroked him harder & more quickly, & he closed his eyes, swallowing hard. Leaning down, I kissed his chest & gently licked his nipples. He let out a low grunt & raised his long arms lazily above his head. As I continued to stroke him, I flicked my tongue quickly against his stiff nipples & he tilted his head back, arching his neck, soft gasps escaping his lips. 

I placed a trail of kisses from his chest to his stomach & tickled his belly button with my tongue. He let out a soft chuckle mixed with a moan. I glanced up at his face. His eyes were still closed but there was a small sweet smile on his lips. My mouth traveled lower & I kissed the base of his erect cock, he moaned deeply. 

My tongue ran up the length of his silky shaft to the tip, & I slid the velvety head into my mouth. He groaned & I looked up at him. He grabbed another pillow & placed it under his neck, making it easy for him to watch me. I got up on my knees & leaned down, wrapping my fist around the base. I moved my lips & tongue slowly around the slick smooth tip before lowering my mouth half way down his length. He reached down with both hands, gently gathered up my hair & pushed it over my far shoulder, unblocking his view. I slid my mouth languidly up & down his girthy shaft, relishing the taste of him. 

He ran the tips of his nails across the cheeks of my ass, sending shivers up my spine. I lowered my mouth as far as I could, unable to take his generous length all at once. My fist gripped the base of his cock tighter & I could feel his strong pulse against my palm. I slid my wet mouth up & down quicker & his groan became more guttural. I looked back up at him & his eyes were locked on me.

He drew his hand back & gave my ass cheeks a sharp slap. I grunted around his cock but didn’t stop moving my mouth. He did it again, but harder. I grunted again & kept going, not moving my eyes from his face. His third smack echoed loudly in the room & was hard enough to rock my body forward, my hair falling into my face. My mouth lifted off of him & I let out a yelp, the cheeks of my ass stung & felt hot. I looked up at him, that dark animalistic quality that had paced back & forth restlessly behind his eyes earlier today was now on full display. 

His upper body raised up & he grabbed me under my arms, setting me down on the bed next to him, ass up. He got up & removed the rest of his clothing, climbing back into bed naked, except for his rings, his watch, & his many silver bracelets. I turned my head & watched him as he knelt behind me, pulling my hips roughly back towards him, his cock poking the back of my thigh. I lifted up on my arms so that I was on my hands & knees, & I felt him position the head his cock against my opening. Before I could think another thought, he plunged half his thick length into me.

I groaned loudly, my mouth staying open, & hung my head. He pushed the rest of his throbbing girth into me & began to fuck me roughly, his bracelets clinking in time with his hips. I moaned deeply with each of his powerful thrusts, my breasts bouncing beneath me. His grunts were deep, bordering on growls, & they turned me on even more. His fingers dug into my hips, pulling me forcefully back against him as he slammed into me over & over again. My vocalizations morphed between moans of great pleasure & pleading whimpers of total submission. And I could tell he knew what each sound meant.

“Shit…” His tone had a slight tremble & urgency to it.

I felt him wrap his fingers in my hair & he pulled my head back up. He began to drive into me harder & faster, pulling my hair firmly. I grunted in the same animal tone he was using. He let go of my hair & grabbed the front of my throat with his right hand, pulling me up on my knees as he continued to slam into me. Hooking his left arm around my hips, & keeping his other hand on my neck, he leaned me slightly back against him & drove his demanding shaft relentlessly up into me, bouncing me hard on his big cock. My fingers gripped his thighs as I raked my nails across them in ecstasy. He licked the side of my face & nipped at my ear, breathing into it.

“So fucking close to cumming.” His voice thick with unfiltered lust.

“I want you to cum for me.” My voice matching his lewd tone.

He groaned deeply & set me down on my hands & knees again. He withdrew his turgid shaft, rolled me onto my back, & pushed himself deeply back inside me. I whined & hugged his sides with my knees. He began to move hard & fast against me again, this time watching my face. I grabbed his ass & dug my nails into his flesh. He let out a loud groan & slammed his hips into me even harder. I cried out, & placed my palms against his chest. Looking into his dark blue eyes, all I saw were bright flames. He lifted his chest up a bit & looked down at our joined hips, he started to whimper deeply. 

He continued to pump me rough & fast but his rhythm became more erratic, more frantic. Two beads of sweat rolled down his temple, & his mouth opened a little. His eyes met mine again, his need & urgency in plain view. I moved my hips against him in the same hard manner that he did to me, & I looked deep into his wanton eyes. I reached up & held his damp face gently between my palms, not moving my gaze from his. My hips still rocking quickly against his. 

“You’re gonna cum, aren’t you.” My voice soft, coaxing.

He nodded quickly, wetting his lips, panting, “Yesss...mmhmm…”

I kissed his trembling lips & smoothed his damp hair off his forehead.

“C’mon, baby...c’mon…” My tone gently encouraging, suggestive.

He nodded quickly again & whimpered, shutting his eyes tight for a moment before reopening them.

“Ohhh...fuck fuck fuck...shit…” His words dissolving into a loud moaning whine as he came hard inside me, his hips bucking frantically against me. 

A droplet of sweat fell from his jaw onto my cheek. He slowed his movements, but continued to slide his still rigid cock in & out of me. I kissed his lips again & he returned my kiss with a tender passion, his motions slowing down even more. I ran my legs slowly up & down his damp sides & pulled my mouth from his, softly kissing his forehead. He let out a deep sigh & lay down on me, his hips finally coming to a stop. 

After a few moments, he gently pulled out of me & slid his body off to the side, resting his head on my shoulder, his arm draped across my belly. He turned my face towards his & we spent the next few minutes kissing softly. He lay his head down on my chest & I looked down at him, a smile spreading across my lips. 

“What?” He mirrored my smile, his voice quiet.

I took the tip of my ring finger & delicately ran it under his eye, showing him the dark smudge of his smeared eyeliner. He blinked rapidly & rolled off me & onto his back next to me. He ran both of his ring fingers under his eyes & looked at the tips of his liner stained fingers. He knotted his eyebrows.

“It’s supposed to be sweat proof.”

He wiped under his eyes again, then looked disapprovingly at his fingers again. 

“But I guess not sex proof.” His tone dismissive.

I couldn’t help but let out a little laugh at his sincere concern. I snuggled up to his side & lay my head down on his chest, my hand resting on his belly.

“Do I look like a Waschbär? Um… A raccoon?”

I was smiling before I even looked up at him due to that same hint of sincere concern in his softly accented voice. He lifted his head, raised both sharp eyebrows & opened his eyes wider as if that would help ME to see better. That only made my smile grow bigger.

“No. You don’t look like raccoon.” My tone comforting.

“No?” He wrinkled his nose & shook his head slowly.

“No.” 

He let out a small sigh of relief & lay his head back down.

“Good. I don’t want to look like a Waschbär,” gentle playfulness in his quiet tone.

I looked at him for a moment longer & then lay my head back down on his warm chest, my hand back on his warm belly, my smile soft but still in place. 

Chris smiled warmly down at me & ran his fingers slowly through my hair.

“Want to get a little sleep?” That low, quiet tone I’ve always known.

I nodded, & his smile grew a little wider. He reached for the little nightstand lamp & turned it off, bathing my little bedroom in a soothing silky darkness.

He wrapped his long arms around me & pulled me close against his warm naked body. I held onto him, nuzzling his chest, closing my eyes.

“Good night.” His voice peaceful.

“Good night.” My voice peaceful, too.

As my body & breathing relaxed, my mind was restless as I drifted off. The image of one person kept shimmering in my head like an exotic desert mirage. And she held my still smoldering halo in her hands.


	14. What He Wants, What He Needs

The dim blue-grey light of dawn greeted my sleepy eyes as they creaked open. I was on my back, the view of my bedroom ceiling filling my line of sight. Turning my head, I looked out the window & saw silvery raindrops trickling down the glass. I yawned & turned my head the other way & saw the back of a messy black mohawk. My yawn morphed into a silent smile. 

Chris lay to my right, on his stomach, his head turned away from me, his right arm resting across my belly. I moved onto my right side, carefully easing his long arm off me & onto the bed so that his shoulder wouldn’t be tweaked at a weird angle with my change in position. 

I gently ran my fingertips through the hair on the back of his head. It was thick & soft & getting longer, some of the tips already showing a slight wave. I couldn’t help but smile again, knowing Frisur (haircut) was going to show up on his to-do list soon. 

There was an early morning chill in the air & I pulled the comforter up higher, covering his exposed back. I curled up against his arm & counted his silver bracelets with my eyes. Six, seven. No, six only. No, seven. I knotted my eyebrows & counted quietly. One, two, three, four… I squinted & moved my face a little closer to his wrist, five, six...seven. 

“Sechs (Six).” Chris’ gravely muffled voice floated up from the pillow.

He lifted his head, turned his sleepy face towards me, & dropped his head back down. He blinked slowly. 

“There’s a thin one that slides under the one next to it, looks like there’s an extra one.” His voice low & croaky, another slow sleepy blink.

“Six.” I confirmed.

“Mmhmm.” He gave a lazy nod.

I smiled softly & watched his drowsy handsome face, morning stubble gracing his jaw, a couple of dark locks of hair falling across one eye. He lifted his hand, his bracelets quietly clinking, & stroked my cheek. He moved his face close to mine & gently kissed me. 

“It’s warm, not cold.” The mystery-solved tone in my voice.

He rested the side of his face back down on the pillow & narrowed his eyes in a questioning manner. I glanced at his lip piercing.

“Your lip ring. I always thought it might feel cold because it’s metal.”

He pouted his lower lip a bit & looked down for second. He looked back at me with a crooked lazy smile.

“Is that what’s been on your mind since you first met me?” His tone curious.

I tried to stop an embarrassed smirk from forming, but couldn’t. I turned my face into the pillow. Chris carefully pushed back a few wisps of hair from the side of my face & gently stroked the back of my head.

“C’mon, tell me.” 

I kept my face in the pillow & shook my head. He let out a little chuckle & gave my ear a very soft playful pinch.

“C’monnn… It’s too late to be shy with me, don’t you think?” His pointedly keen observation bathed in a sweet tender tone.

Lifting my head, I rested the side of my face back down & looked at him. I gave the smallest possible nod I could. His blue eyes glimmered in the growing morning light & I could now hear the low taps of raindrops hitting the window pane. 

“Really? Since that first day we met?” His eyebrows lifted, the interest in his voice growing.

Another small silent nod from me, my mind going back to that nerve racking first day for me. His eyes roamed slowly across my face as if studying me. 

“Can I tell you a secret?” His tone was quiet & soft.

Again, my little nod. He paused for a moment, moved onto his side & propped his head up on his palm, resting his elbow on the pillow. My eyes fell on the two necklaces that dangled from his neck.

“That same night, after our first meeting, I had a dream about you.” 

This time it was my turn to lift my eyebrows in interest. A slightly shy smile curled up one side of his mouth as he smoothed his hair back with his fingers.

“In my dream, you came into the studio the next day wearing this very long heavy black coat. It went all the way to the floor, almost like a gown.” 

I tucked my arms under the pillow, snuggling it, a smile growing on my lips as I watched him with great interest.

He wet his lips & glanced down for a moment before lifting his eyes again & continuing. His voice was low & soft, his mild accent sexy.

“You said ‘guten Morgen (good morning)’ to me & then went to the coat rack. You took off your coat & you were completely nude underneath except for these sexy shoes with a very high heel.”

My eyebrows rose as he showed the height of the heel with his thumb & index finger.

“But you were walking around like everything was normal, nothing unusual here.”

I grinned as he continued.

“Even in the dream, I was like, ‘whoa, ok, what’s going on’.”

A laugh escaped out of me as his face made the “confused look” to match his confusion in his dream. 

“But I didn’t say anything to you because I was thinking, well, if it doesn’t bother her then I will just act normal also.”

“You were trying to be considerate.” My voice gently teasing.

He tilted his head, smirked at me & gave me a chiding look. I grinned again.

“Anywaaay… So, I’m acting normal,” he emphasized "normal" with air quotes, “& you’re walking around the studio naked in these crazy high heels. But in the dream I’m getting, you know...excited, but I’m also acting like, hey, everything is cool.”

I let out another laugh, enjoying his animated expressions & hand gestures.

“So, then finally I’m like, wow, this is getting crazy. I have this big erection in my pants…”

I snorted & buried my face in my pillow. Chris started laughing.

“What… That’s what was happening!” 

His excited incredulous tone only making me laugh harder into the pillow.

“I’m thinking, now what do I do, she’s going to see this...thing…”

I looked over at him as he moved his hand in a big circular motion over the comforter in front of his hip area.

“That big?” My incredulous tone matching his.

He raised one sharply defined eyebrow, tilted his head down a bit & lifted the comforter, giving me a peek at his current morning erection. My eyes opened wider in surprise. He dropped the comforter again, cutting off my view & continued nonchalantly.

“Then, I spend the rest of the dream trying to hide myself from the waist down. I hold all these things in front of me, folders, boxes, the keyboard from a computer, even this big synth for some reason.”

I started laughing hard at the image of him walking around the studio holding a synthesizer in front of his crotch. His chuckle also quickly turned into a hard laugh. 

“Wahnsinn (madness), right?” His words mixing with his laughter.

I wiped the tears from my eyes & dropped my face back into the pillow, shaking my head, still giggling. I could still hear him chuckling softly, then I felt his arm snake around my waist & pull me back to him so that he was spooning me.

He pushed the comforter down the bed, removing it from between us & nuzzled my neck. His hand moved back & forth between my breasts, caressing them, & I moaned softly. He turned my face back towards his & kissed me passionately as his right hand traveled down the front of my body, his six silver bracelets gliding across my skin. 

I felt his long fingers stroke my thighs & I parted them, eager for his touch. He teased my delicate folds with his sharp nails & I shivered, emitting a soft gasp. He slid his hard cock between my thighs & moved it slowly back & forth as his warm mouth found my neck once again. Thunder rolled slowly, low & deep, across the grey skies outside. 

I reached back & gently held the back of his head, offering my neck to him. My eyes closed as I felt him bite a new spot on my skin. He took a hold of his rigid shaft & positioned himself against my small opening. I immediately parted my thighs wider, my desire for him taking over once more.

He pushed himself gently into me with a low grunt that I echoed back to him. He released his mouth from my neck & began to buck against me slowly. I didn’t want slowly. I rolled my hips back against him with a lusty need. He looked into my eyes & I could see that raw animal flame ignite in his. I licked his strong chin & bit it, not too gently. 

“You need me to dominate you, don’t you.” His tone deep & lecherous.

I nodded, “Yes, please…” 

He started roughly slamming into me, hard enough to make me bounce against him.

“Yes, what,” a slight urgent quiver to his commanding voice.

“Yes, Chris,” my voice part whimper, part moan.

He pushed his large cock deeper into me & pounded me relentlessly, my hair falling into my face.

“Yes, what,” he repeated with emphasis, the urgency in his dominant tone increasing.

“Yes, Sir…” I groaned & held onto his forearm with both of my hands.

“Again,” now simply an order, a command, & a quiver of imminent release.

“Yes, Sir…”

“Mmmmm…” Chris groaned deeply.

“Yes, Sir…” My voice also quivering.

He gripped the side of my hip & pulled me tight back against him.

“Fuckkk..,” his groans mingling with whimpers.

“Yes, Sir… Yes, Sir..,” my need as urgent as his.

“Ohhh, fuckkk, yesss…” He let out a long guttural moaning whimper & thrust roughly up into me as his orgasm shot out of him.

“Ohhh fuck yes, Sirrrrr…” My own orgasm rocketing through my body. 

He held me tightly to him as I came, his movements slowing down. He kissed my cheek & then his soft lips found mine. His smile was sweet, & the animalistic urge gone from his deep blue eyes as he pulled his face back & looked tenderly at me. He gently withdrew & turned my body to face him, smoothing a lock of my hair behind my ear. 

“Are you ok?” His voice soft with genuine concern.

“Yes...Sir.” I gave him a sweet smile, my voice quiet.

A wide smile spread across his face, his eyes sparkling. I couldn’t help but return the same big smile. He kissed me slowly & deeply, then he kissed my forehead. When he pulled his face back, my eyes searched his & the word came out before I had a chance to think about what I wanted to say.

“Viki,” my voice more of a weird squeak.

A small comforting smile formed on his lips as he ran his thumb gently across my cheek, his eyes now searching mine also. I could hear the rain drumming the bedroom window with a steady rhythm, my heart clenching in preparation for words I didn’t want to hear, for flaws in him I didn’t want to see. 

He lay on his side, his face resting on the pillow, his hand reached down for mine & he took a hold of it, giving it a soft squeeze. I swallowed hard.

“We didn’t do anything wrong.” His familiar low soft voice also reassuring.

My wide unsure eyes silently searched his face for more. 

“You...didn’t do anything wrong.”

He emphasized his reassuring smile & gave my hand another gentle squeeze. I looked deeply into his tender eyes & only saw genuine sincerity. The cloud of deception that I had been introduced to in my ex-fiance’s gaze was nowhere to be seen in Chris’.

“Viki & I…” He paused for a moment, then continued.

“We have what some people might see as a unique relationship.” 

I watched his face closely, going back & forth between his soft blue eyes & his softly speaking mouth.

“For as long as I’ve had girlfriends, relationships, I’ve usually been attracted to more than just one person. I really don’t remember a time when I wasn’t this way. It’s never been difficult for me to be with, to love, more than one person at a time, but it has caused difficulty in my life.”

His words sunk slowly into me as I continued to listened with focus.

“When I’m dating a girl &, you know, we’re getting to know each other, learning things about each other, I’m always honest with her about this way that I am. That, if we become a ‘couple’ ..,” he put an air quote on ‘couple’ with one hand, “ … I might still want to be with someone else, but that doesn’t mean I want her any less, or that the other person is more important or more desirable to me.”

He narrowed his eyes a little at me.

“Does this make any sense to you? Do you kind of understand?” His gently questioning tone wanted an honest answer from me.

I gave a small nod.

“I do understand. It sounds like it’s not just about sex for you, but maybe also about a deeper connection with people.”

My words to him weren’t just thoughtless, mindless acknowledgements of what he’d just told me. I really did understand what he was telling me. It wasn’t about having his cake & eating it too, or quantity over quality. And it wasn’t about being in an open relationship, either. It was something more meaningful to him, something much more to do with what was going on in his heart & mind rather than just between his legs. And I could also see how this might cause him a lot of problems in his love life.

“Yes, it’s not just about sex for me. I genuinely want to be with the other person, sometimes even more than just one other person. And I’m sure you can see how this can make my private life very complicated. But I have never lied to anyone I’m involved with about this. I’ve always been open & upfront with any girl that is going to become my girlfriend. Some have decided this is not for them & we part in a friendly way, & there are even a few I’m still friends with today. The problem is when my girlfriend tells me she’s ok if I become interested in another person & then if that happens, & it doesn’t ALWAYS happen either, I find out she really isn’t ok with it.”

As he spoke to me, I could see the phantoms of failed relationships haunt his caring face.

“It causes me great pain to know that I’ve hurt someone else. I end up feeling very guilty, & sometimes even shameful, even though she assured me that she is ok with everything I’ve just told her. Sometimes the girl will even say that she, herself, would be interested in being with this other person, like a three way. Ich denke dann, sehr cool (Then I think, very cool). But a lot of time it was just talk, she didn’t really mean it, about the three way or with me having another relationship in my life.”

A small frown crept across his mouth & there was a quiet pain in his blue eyes.

“So, then I would say to myself, since this occasional desire to be with other people is mostly causing pain & problems for me & my girlfriend, then just stop it. Stop doing it.”

He let out a little sigh of frustration.

“And I would try, you know? I would really try hard to focus my heart on just the one girl I was with at that time. Ja (Yes), & sometimes it worked. I did have a few relationships where I was only with her while we were together. But when I started to pat myself on the back for being 'good’, I realized it was because I hadn’t met anyone else that I was really interested in. That’s all, nothing to do with me being good.”

He gave me a weak smirk & continued.

“All of that is in the past, at this point. But I’m still that way, it’s how my heart & brain are, I don’t know, wired. Viki has known this about me from the time we first met, & she is one of the very few girlfriends I’ve had that actually really is ok with it.”

His weak smirk transformed into a small, but genuinely warm smile. 

“She knows I’ve been attracted to you for a while now & we’ve had lots of talks about you & my feelings for you.”

My eyes grew wide again as I listened to him tell me things I’d never known.

“Before I even considered telling you, or showing you my feelings, I wanted Viki to know everything I was thinking. Then I wanted to give her time to think about all this & to be completely honest with her thoughts & feelings. And she did take her time, months actually, & we made sure to keep communication open between us. She wanted time to get to know you better since she wasn’t spending as much time with you as I was. And, after some time, she came to me & said she liked you very much, & that she felt comfortable having you be a part of my life, our life really, if you, of course, felt the same way about me & felt comfortable with her being a part of my life.”

His eyes showed caring concern & a hint of worry, as he searched my face.

“I don’t want to scare you away with all of this & I don’t want an answer right now even if you feel like you can give one.”

I was surprised that my mind wasn’t spinning & even more surprised that I didn’t have a million questions. My thoughts were actually calm & I knew exactly what he was saying to me, what he was asking me, & what kind of relationship he wanted the three of us to have. This wasn’t going to be a simple relationship with him. This wasn’t going to be an easy relationship with him. This wasn’t going to be a relationship that an immature fangirl with a crush would be able to have with him. Chris was a mature grown man with a lot of experience with women & some complex relationship needs. And I could easily see how a woman might quickly agree to anything he proposed just to be with him. I needed to be absolutely sure that this was something Adult Me truly wanted & that my heart could truly handle. Otherwise, I would just be leading him on & playing a game with his heart, & that would simply be cruel. Chris was a good man & honest about what he wanted with his relationships. He deserved the same in return.

I gave him a comforting look & squeezed his hand.

“Thank you for telling me all this & thank you for giving me time to think about everything.”

The glimmer of uncertainty & worry left his beautiful eyes & was replaced by a gentle warmth. A soft shy smile rested on his face. 

“As much time as you need.” His voice was very quiet.

He brought his face close to mine & kissed me with a tender passion, & I responded in the same way.

We spent a little time just talking & sweetly cuddling, & I felt happier than I had in a long while. Eventually we got up & I quickly showered & dressed as he checked his messages & returned a few calls. He suggested we pick up breakfast on the way to the studio, after stopping off at his place first so he could also take a quick shower & get some fresh clothes. 

As we left my building, he took my umbrella from me & shielded us from the steady rainfall as we headed to his car. I smiled as he held the passenger door open for me. He looked incredibly sexy in his suit from last night. Except this morning the tailored vest was unbuttoned, the sleek tie was just draped around the back of his neck, the top three buttons of his dress shirt undone, stubble covered his jaw & his hair was only finger combed back with a couple of thick strands occasionally falling in front of his eyes. Yes, sexy. 

“Why the smile?” A crooked smile teasing the corners of his mouth.

I looked up at him as I sat down, still smiling.

“You look good the morning after.”

He narrowed his eyes & smirked.

“I look like shit.”

He shut the door before I could say anything & that made me laugh.

As he slid into the driver’s seat, he held onto the side of his long black overcoat, the strong breeze making it billow around him like a cape. 

After he had showered & changed clothes at his place, we picked up some fresh rolls, cold cuts & some sliced fresh fruit before going to the studio. Once we got there, I noticed my car was just fine after spending the rainy night in the rear parking lot. 

The studio door was open & the lights were on as we walked in. It smelled like fresh brewed coffee. Ulli was seated on the couch, sipping from her mug & writing something down on a notepad. She looked up at us & smiled.

“Guten Morgen (Good morning),” her tone was mellow & pleasant.

Chris & I echoed her greeting back to her, almost in unison. Ulli’s smile stayed in place as her eyes moved from Chris to me, & back to Chris again. I felt my cheeks warm up a little & prayed not to blush.

“Guten Morgen, Kaffee (coffee) is ready.”

I turned & saw Viki’s smiling face.


	15. Wicked Weather

For about three seconds I knew I looked like a deer caught in headlights as I looked back at her pleasant expression.

“Guten Morgen (Good morning), Viki.” I forced down the surprised lilt in my tone, but my raised eyebrows weren’t cooperating.

“Morgen.” Chris’ voice was as relaxed as Ulli’s as he held the open paper bag of still warm rolls out to Viki. 

Her eyes flashed with delight & she let out a little “ooh” as she removed one of the chubby little golden ovals.

“Danke (Thank you).” Her tone mellow as everyone else’s. Everyone else’s except mine.

Chris kept his eyes on her as she took a bite, then moved his eyes to Ulli as he held the bag out to her. Ulli held Chris’ gaze for a moment, the still pleasant, low key smile on her lips, before reaching into the bag & pulling out one of the freshly baked rolls. Her bright eyes shifted to me as she took a bite, then back to her musical partner.

“Danke,” as relaxed as a lazy Sunday morning.

The slightest lip purse forming on Chris’ mouth as his deep blue eyes spoke privately to the songstress for just the briefest of moments, his left eyebrow lifting just a bit, punctuating his silent words. He turned & held the bag out to me, his expression quietly playful. I pulled out a roll & held it, the gentle warmth feeling good against my palm. His eyes stayed locked on mine & I noticed how silent the room suddenly was, as if everyone was holding their breath. Waiting. I took a small bite & there was that little eyebrow lift from Chris again.

“Danke,” my voice sounding small. 

“Bitte (You’re welcome).” His tone low & quiet as he gave a little courteous tip of his head to me. He turned & gave the same slight tip of his head to Ulli & then to Viki. 

This sliver of a moment that would soon be lost in time had a strange, surreal feel to it. It was as if we’d received some kind of Communion from Chris, rolls replacing religious wafers, as if I’d just crossed some unseen threshold that was only invisible to me. 

“Kaffee (coffee)?”

Viki’s upbeat voice snapped me out of my mental fog. She held the the coffee pot up as she smiled.

“Yeah, yes, please,” my mouth slightly dry.

As Chris set out the plate of cold cuts & fruit, I set my messenger bag down & hung up my coat. 

“No to Chris, or this?”

I turned as I heard Viki’s voice, but not knowing who she was addressing or, to be honest, what she was asking.

Her still smiling face was focused on me as she held up the two coffee mugs I’d been given by Chris & Ulli when I’d first arrived here. After Chris hung up his coat & prepared his coffee, he took a seat in his usual office chair that he’d rolled up next to the low table by the couch that Ulli sat on. As he & his band mate selected slices of fresh fruit & savory cold cuts, I looked at the mugs that Viki held.

Which mug I wanted to use? That is what she was asking me, wasn’t it? For some reason I glanced at Chris & Ulli. They were happily eating, their cheeks full of food, watching Viki & I. I turned my attention back to the mugs & pointed to the ‘this’ choice, ‘I Moved To Berlin For This??’.

“This.” The choice I wanted. 

Suddenly, there were two back to back explosive claps of thunder. Power went out in the entire studio, the lights, all the equipment, everything. Since it was quite grey & gloomy outside, the room was plunged into an inky darkness. After a few seconds the lights came back on & I half expected to see Chris sitting there looking like he did on the Lucifer Purgatory & Blaze albums. I blinked rapidly & shook my head a little.

“Wow!” Ulli’s exclamation spoke for all of us.

“Everybody ok?” Chris was genuinely concerned. 

The three of us chimed in that we were all fine. He set his plate down, got up, & went to check out the studio’s equipment. Viki poured a cup of coffee for me as Ulli got up & peeked out the window blinds. I took the mug from Viki & thanked her as I added some cream & sugar.

“No, to ‘no to Chris’.” 

I looked over at her as she sipped her coffee next to me & I repeated her statement but with a question mark.

“Ja (Yes). You said ‘no’ to ‘No To Chris’. You choose this one.” Her smile was sweet as she pointed to my ‘Moved To Berlin’ mug.

I nodded & mirrored back her friendly expression, silently pondering the amusing word play. She knew what she was saying. I knew what she meant. Both of us took a sip of our coffee.

As everyone took a seat again & resumed breakfast, Mario walked in while closing up his umbrella. Morning greetings were exchanged all around & Chris convinced his producer to have a seat & eat something before fussing over any possible issues with the equipment due to power problems. Mario hung up his wet raincoat & ran his fingers through his hair, shaking off any remaining rain drops. He rolled a chair next to Chris & sat down with a sigh. While they ate & discussed business issues with Ulli, I checked my phone to see what was scheduled for today. Most of the items on the to-do list were simple errands, pick up & drop off kind of stuff.

“Cancel all of that for today.”

I looked up from my phone at Chris. He took a sip of his coffee & waved his hand dismissively at me as he set his cup back down on the table, his slim eyebrows knotted.

“I don’t want you driving around in the storm. That stuff can wait.”

“Good idea.” Ulli chimed in agreeingly.

“Ja (Yes), it’s bad out there. It was raining so hard when I drove into the lot that I could barely see out the windshield, even with the wipers on high.” Mario shook his head.

“So does that mean I have a free day off?” My tone chipper.

Ulli finished chewing & smiled at me.

“I think so, yes?” She looked over at her long & lanky musical partner.

“Hmm… I don’t know. Maybe I should find something else for her to do.” Chris narrowed his eyes at Ulli until they were almost slits, his voice teasingly contemplative.

Ulli rolled her eyes in an exaggerated way.

“Puuuh… Ach, Gott (Oh, God).” She looked back over at me & continued, “Yes, you have the day off.” She shook her head & chuckled.

Mario snickered as he rubbed his full stomach.

“He’s such a slave driver, isn’t he?” The producers tone filled with mock disgust.

Viki let out a laugh.

“At home, too. ‘Viki, beeil dich (hurry up).’ ‘Viki, wir werden uns verspäten (we’re going to be late).’ ‘Viki, go go go.’ Immer (Always).” Her whiney imitation of Chris’ voice made everyone snort, including Chris.

The targeted Goth just smirked, picked up his coffee cup & sipped silently, his piercing eyes playfully chiding each one of us, one after the other.

“Well, you can stay here with us boring people today. We’re going to be doing vocals most of the day.” Ulli looked at me for my feedback.

Before I could answer, Viki jumped in.

“No. You come with me. I want to buy some nice pillows for the couch before the video game party.” Her upbeat tone was genuinely excited as she looked at me.

“That sounds like more fun.” Ulli’s tone was also upbeat as she nodded in agreement.

“I don’t want you two driving in that heavy rain.” Chris’ tone gentle but serious.

“Just one store. We will drive slow.” Viki’s smile at Chris was as sincere as her statement.

Chris smirked again as he processed her words. He motioned his index finger at his girlfriend.

“Ok, but you drive, not her. You’re more familiar with this kind of weather.”

“Ja (Yes), I drive.” Viki’s smile grew bigger.

Pillow shopping with the woman whose boyfriend I’d just slept with. My stomach was letting me know exactly how it felt about that.

After everyone had finished eating, Chris poured himself another cup of coffee & sat down at one of the computers while Mario made a couple of business calls. Ulli picked up her notepad again & jotted a few things down as Viki & I prepared to leave & embark on her couch pillow hunt.

“Bereit zu gehen (Ready to go)?” Her eyes & tone were bright & as she looked at me.

I cinched the belt on my raincoat, nodded, & matched her upbeat voice, “Let’s go.”

She went over to Chris & gave him a quick kiss on the lips, “Wir sehen uns später (We’ll see each other later), ciao.”

Chris smiled up at her from his chair, “Ciao.”

He turned his head towards me, “Ciao, Maddy.”

“Ciao.” I gave him a little smile hoping it didn’t give away the awkward feeling I was having.

Viki came back over to me as Ulli & Mario wished us a successful shopping trip. As we headed out the studio, Chris’ loud voice trailed behind us.

“No crazy driving!”

“Ok!” Viki’s voice as loud as his. She glanced at me & rolled her eyes, shaking her head. 

The rain started to come down heavy again as we drove & we really had no choice but to drive slow simply because it was difficult to see. Mario was right. Even with the wipers on high, they could barely keep pace with the down pour. But, an advantage to the storm was that once we got to the store, we were only one of a handful of cars in the lot. And we could park close to the entrance.

We shielded ourselves as best we could from the wet onslaught & sprinted to the doors, making it inside as lightning flashed, closely followed by a low roll of thunder. We shook the rain off our umbrellas, put them away, then tried to put ourselves back together after that mad dash through Mother Nature’s car wash.

As we walked through the front part of the store, I realized this wasn’t a furniture or accessory shop, or even a bed & bath type of store. Viki explained to me that this was a wholesale interior design place. And as I looked around at all the beautiful & unique things they had, I knew I would be returning to pick out a couple of pieces for my little place.

We took the glowing neon escalator to the second floor & wound our way to “Wohnzimmer/Kissen (Living Room/Pillows)”. My eyes were greeted by row after row, & bin after bin of all different kinds of couch & chair pillows, & no two seemed to be exactly alike. I’d never seen anything like it. It was a world filled with soft, puffy exotic jewels of every imaginable shape, size, color & fabric. Among the traditional shapes & designs, there were also animal shapes, all kinds of geometric ones, & pillows that looked like shoes, food, body parts & even celebrities. I immediately spotted a George Clooney, Justin Bieber & One Direction pillow. 

Viki nudged my shoulder & nodded towards the famous faces as if she knew the next thought that was forming in my brain.

“They had Chris. Well, two Chris’.”

I looked at her with a surprised smile. She nodded again.

“One like this…” She made a big square shape with her hands, about a foot & a half, height & width, & then continued.

“Omen Gesicht (face)? Very white, very schwarz (black) around the eyes?” Her expression asking if I was familiar with that look. 

“Yes, mmhmm.” I nodded.

“Und (And) one with altes Bild (old picture) spikey Haare (hair)? Sehr jung (Very young).”

I nodded again. I was familiar with that look, too.

She smiled & glanced at the row of famous faced pillows, then gave a little playful frown.

“But, no more.” Her tone was a touch disappointed.

We spent the next while looking at several options & I noticed Viki didn’t have any real specifics on a particular look or design, or even color she was interested in. The only thing she was sure of was that she wanted four pillows, other features would just have to “grab her” as she shopped.

We ended up at a bin of bright, pretty, jewel toned ones. Most of which were round or oval, & smaller in size than traditional square shaped couch pillows. The majority of them were also made of silk/satin combinations & a lot of them had very colorful, delicate, but intricate, needlework designs.

I always referred to these kinds of pillows as the Arabian Nights collection. They made me think of beautiful desert locations, under a dusky, star filled evening sky, with exotic looking women surrounded by these lovely little fabric gems.

Viki must have noticed how I was admiring them.

“I like them, too.” Her voice cheerful but quiet. 

She ran her well manicured hand across a purple satin pillow & then looked at me.

“I know.” Her tone still quiet, soft. Her small smile gentle.

That “deer caught in headlights” feeling swept up on me again, & I fought to keep my eyes from opening too wide. I found myself speechless, not because I felt guilty, but simply because I didn’t know how to respond. Do I come back with, “Oh, yeah?” Or, “Really?” Or, “How do you know?” Or the ever popular, let’s-play-stupid, “Know what?”

She gave a little nod, the gentle smile still in place.

“I know.” She repeated those two words softly again & placed her hand over mine, which was resting on an emerald green pillow.

“It’s ok.” Her gently comforting tone not easing the weight I felt from these few acknowledging words she spoke to me.

I felt the blood rush to my cheeks & my face quickly heated up, & I still couldn’t find my words. She gave the back of my hand a little squeeze as her blue eyes searched my eyes, not so much for a response, but to see how I was doing, how I was holding up inside. I returned a small smile to her that was tighter than I wanted it to be. She seemed fairly comfortable with all of this, & to be honest, I really wanted to be comfortable with this too. And I believed I could be, she would just have to give me a little time to get there. 

We continued to look at pillows until she finally decided on four that she wanted. They were all different in shape, size & surface design, but had a recurring color scheme that tied them together nicely. Her relaxed, laid back, & still quietly comforting manner, also helped me to feel more at ease with our new, unique situation.

The store taped the plastic shopping bags closed to help prevent the new purchases from getting wet. As we pulled out our still damp umbrellas, Viki suggested I wait in the store with the bags as she pulled her car up to the entrance. With the rain coming down in sheets, I easily agreed.

As she carefully drove us out of the parking lot, we talked about where to go for lunch. But first she wanted to stop by a local drug store to pick up a few things. And since I needed a few things also, we agreed that this additional stop to our “one store only” trip, never happened. 

She placed her extended index finger against her red lips, “Shhhhh.”

I smiled, feeling more relaxed, & mimicked her secretive motion.

We’d stayed longer at the drugstore than we had intended to, spending most of the time trying all the fun samples & tester items at the cosmetic & fragrance counters. 

We ended up having an early lunch at a pizza place & our conversation was easy & relaxed & never focused on Chris. And the thing I found most interesting was that neither one of us was consciously making an effort to avoid bringing him up. He just didn’t come up. It was odd, in a pleasant way though, that Chris was still there in spirit but we didn’t feel like we had to talk about him. I liked how that felt.

Before leaving, Viki ordered a large pizza to take back to the studio for the busy musicians we’d abandoned. We got back just as the rain began to ease off, which made it much easier to deliver a non-soggy pizza. 

When we got back inside the studio, we found the trio pretty much the way we’d left them. After setting out the pizza, Viki stated she had a couple of things to do & wanted to try to get them done asap in case it started to rain hard again. I asked Chris if he wanted me to run any of the errands that were scheduled for today since the rain had all but stopped. But he stuck with the original plan of just leaving them for tomorrow, as long as tomorrow stayed fairly dry.

As Mario set out paper plates & napkins for their pizza lunch, Ulli made a phone call & Chris told them he was going to walk Viki & I out to our cars. He also stuck by the original plan of letting me have the rest of the day off, which made Ulli smile teasingly at her band mate & wink playfully at me while she was on her call. 

The three of us exited the building under threatening, but dry skies. Viki had parked her car next to mine, & as she gave Chris a quick peek at their new couch pillows, I set my messenger bag down inside my car & proceeded to get in. I stopped & looked up when I heard Chris call my name, & saw him motion for me to come over to where he & Viki stood. I shut my door & walked over to them, my hands in the pockets of my coat for warmth.

Chris held Viki’s hand & gently turned it, showing me the back of her makeup smudged hand. The cosmetic counter at the drugstore. He raised one of his sharp eyebrows at me. His look playful yet gently scolding.

“Show me.” His tone soft but commanding. 

I glanced down at Viki. She was seated sideways in the driver’s seat of her car & had a humorous “uh oh” expression on her face. I pulled my clean right hand out of my pocket & held it out to him. Viki dropped her head & giggled. Chris’ lips tightened as he tried not to smile at me.

“Ihre andere Hand, bitte (Your other hand, please).” The musician’s voice was painfully polite.

I slowly pulled out my other incriminating hand & offered it to him. The black, pink & red “voices” speaking volumes.

Chris took a hold of my guilty hand & held it next to Viki’s just-as-guilty hand, which he still had a hold of. Viki & I exchanged playful scared faces. He gave his girlfriend a hard suspicious look & then shifted his eyes, bestowing the same mock accusing look upon me.

“Interesting furniture store you went to. Selling makeup, also. You’ll have to take me there sometime.” The tall Goth’s tone sounding amused & not amused at the same time.

He let go of our hands & clasped his own hands behind his back as he continued to move his sparkling eyes back & forth between us. 

Viki sighed, “We are fine. See? Nothing happened.” She smiled sweetly up at her boyfriend.

Chris gave her a little smirk.

“I’m glad you’re fine. That is the most important thing, of course. But that isn’t the point, is it.”

His tone gentle & playful, but you could tell he wanted to make a point. He moved his blue eyes to me, his gaze cloaked with humor but still deep.

“We’re sorry.” I looked at Viki & she nodded agreeingly, then I looked back at Chris & continued, trying hard again not to smile.

“Next time we stray from the plan we’ll tell you in advance.” My voice sincere.

“Ja (Yes), we are sorry. We’ll tell you next time.” Viki, though, didn’t try to hide her smile. As a matter of fact, she flashed him a big happy grin.

Chris' smirk grew wider until it broke into a little smile.

“You two should get going. I can feel the little raindrops coming. You don’t want to get wet again. Do you?” The tall, black clad Goth glanced up at the sky, his question sincerely caring but also… 

He looked back down at us, his blue eyes reflecting the darker, more ominous hue of the low grey clouds. Lightning lit up the gloomy day for a couple of seconds, followed by thunder so soft that you felt its baritone vibration more than heard it. We all fell silent for a few heartbeats, watching each other, trying to read each other.

“Drive carefully.” Chris’ quiet voice directed at his girlfriend as his gaze shifted to her.

Viki turned her body, tucking her legs back into her car & shut the door. She started up the engine & lowered her window fully. She gave her boyfriend a small smile as she fastened the seat belt.

Chris moved his hands into the pockets of his coat as he bent down, bringing his face close to hers. He gave her a sweet kiss on the lips.

“Ciao.” His voice more a whisper to her.

She repeated the word back to him just as quietly, then looked at me, repeating it again, giving me a sweet smile & a little wave.

I echoed her word & tone, & returned the same smile & wave. 

Chris & I took a couple steps back as she backed out of the parking space, rolling up her window. We stood silently & watched as she drove off, the cold air making the car’s foggy white exhaust visible.

Chris walked me around to the driver’s side of my car, pulling the door open as I got in. He shut the door with a soft push, then returned his hands to the warmth of his pockets. After I started up the car & lowered my window, he bent down to face me, the dark clouds still in his beautiful eyes.

“Going home?” His words a question & a test.

“Mmhmm, yes.” I was being honest.

“Straight home?” Dark humor in his voice.

I couldn’t help but let out a little laugh.

“Yes. Straight home.”

That familiar little sexy lip purse teasing his mouth. That familiar sparkle in his eyes competing for space with those wicked clouds. 

He gave a little agreeing nod as his gaze traveled quietly across my face. He leaned in & placed a feathery soft kiss on my lips. His lips warm & soft as silk. Pulling back, his stormy eyes roamed gently over my face once more before he straightened up. I looked up at him. I wanted more of his kisses.

“Better get going.” The darkness in his eyes now shadowing his face.

I looked up at the heavy ominous sky, then back at him.

“If it starts to rain again, I’ll be ok, really.” I smiled sweetly, trying to reassure him.

His hands were shoved deep into the pockets of his black coat, blue flames sparking in his dark eyes as he stared at me.

“No. You won’t be ok.” His voice soft & low, laced with a delicate menacing lust.

My eyes unable to move from his seductive face.

“Because if you don’t go now, I’m going to fuck you in my car. And I’m not going to be nice about it.” 

His words stated as simple truth. As fact. Not a warning. Not a threat. Not a promise. Just a glimpse into my immediate future. If I didn’t go now. If I didn’t go. Now. 

There was no smile on his face. No mirth in his look. No break in his stare. Only those two glowing, dark blue flames waiting to engulf me, incinerate me. And at that moment, beneath those groaning wicked skies, I wanted nothing more than to burn in his inferno.


	16. A Ride In The Rain

Chris narrowed his eyes a bit as he continued to look silently down at me. Rain was beginning to fall again. A single broad flash of lightning illuminated the horizon behind him as muffled thunder rolled through the heavy skies above. 

My eyes moved to the key in the ignition & I stared at it for what felt like an eternity. I turned it off. My hand staying on the key. A shadow blocked my lowered window & I turned my head to see Chris, but only from the waist down. He stood next to my door & opened it. 

I got out of my car & looked up at him, a quiet intensity resting on his handsome face, his eyes a war of storm & fire. 

“Will it lock you out if I shut the door?” His voice was low, his eyes locked onto me.

I gave a little shake of my head. He gently closed the car door, looking back into my eyes for a silent moment. He raised his hand just a little & held it out to me. I moved my gaze to his large upturned palm, tracing his long slender fingers with my eyes. His numerous silver rings glimmered in the gloomy early afternoon light. The elongated tips of his manicured fingernails adding an otherworldly beauty to his jewelry adorned hands. I slipped my hand into his, his warm fingers gently curling around mine, like a python. He held my gaze for a moment longer then turned & walked us quietly to his ever beautiful car. His pace unhurried, relaxed. His silky fingers giving my hand a soft squeeze.

He was parked only a few spaces from my car, the dark tint of his windows reflecting our images as we approached. I was expecting to feel nervous or awkward, weird even, knowing that the sole purpose for us getting into his car was to have sex. But it was a feeling that never came. Instead, I felt curious…& aroused. And what did he mean by, “And I’m not going to be nice about it.”?

I heard the soft “whoop” of the car alarm as he unlocked the doors. He held the passenger door open for me. I looked into the cool, dim interior of the cabin & felt small rain drops land on my cheeks. The only sound was the thunder gliding above our heads in a slow moving rumble. 

He stepped closer from behind until I could feel the front of him pressed gently against the back of me. I could also feel the stiffness hidden in his black pants. I swallowed hard & closed my eyes for a moment, more tiny rain drops sliding down my face. He pressed himself discreetly tighter to me & I knew he wanted me to feel his bodies anticipation. My lips parted slightly & I turned my head to the side, my eyes still closed, my voice silent. His fingertips subtly, delicately giving my hips a caress.

“You should get in. You’re getting wet.” His softly accented, throaty wordplay noticeably accurate. 

My eyes reopened slowly & I blinked a few times, then I sat down on the passenger seat like I’d done a hundred times. But 101 was going to be different.

He closed the door quietly & walk around to the driver’s side. Once he got in, he shut his door & set the locks. As he placed his keys down on the dash, the little raindrops grew quickly in size & quantity, their unsteady tempo bouncing thickly off the windshield.

A bright flash of lightning illuminated the grey light outside & inside his car. A heavy groan of low thunder bellowed through the cool moist air.

I felt his hand on the right side of my face & as I turned to him, his warm mouth covered mine in a passionate kiss. My eyes closed again as his long tongue searched for mine, but it didn’t have to look long as I eagerly responded. 

My right hand glided across his rain damp face & hair & came to rest on the back of his head. He kissed me harder, leaning his upper body heavily against me, his right arm hooking around my back. Both of my hands moved to his face, cradling it between my palms as I tried to keep pace with his hungry mouth. 

He pressed his broad chest tighter to me, the weight of his large frame pushing me deeper into the corner of the leather seat & the door. I let out a soft whimper. His upper half reared up as he pulled his face back, his lips pink & kiss swollen, his eyes burning into mine, a crooked wicked smile giving away his thoughts.

I barely had a chance to catch my breath before his demanding mouth latched onto the side of my neck, his teeth biting hard enough to make me yelp & push my palms roughly against his chest. His right hand traveled from my back to my left thigh, pulling it up against his side, turning my hips towards him. His bite turned into a sucking motion & my hands stopped pushing him & began to caress his chest over his soft black sweater. A deep boom of thunder punched the dark skies outside as my whimpers of pain & pleasure mixed with the drumming of the now heavy, steady rainfall.

I felt him repeatedly lick the spot he had just bitten & I wondered if he had drawn blood. Wasn’t a human bite dangerous? More dangerous than a dog bite? That’s what everyone says, isn’t it? My mind was trying to spin off in the direction of better decisions but was blindsided by the feel of his hand moving up my inner thigh. He dragged his sharp nails back & forth across the crotch of my black tights, his forearm nudging up my skirt. He ran the flat of his warm wet tongue up from my neck, across my ear & stopped at my temple.

He let out a soft grunt & pulled his face back for a moment. Yes. He had drawn blood. I could see a small crimson streak smeared on the corner of his mouth. He tilted his head in an odd way as he looked at me, as if seeing me for the first time. His eyes piercing & full of dark intent. Thunder boomed around his car, the corners of his windshield beginning to fog up. The heavy downpour unrelenting. 

His blood stained tongue slid out & gave my lips a lascivious lick. Once. Then again, tilting his head in the other direction. He opened his mouth slightly, raising his eyebrows & giving me a little repeated nod, wordlessly instructing me to mirror him. I did, & his burning eyes fell on my lips. He hovered his mouth over mine, his eyes remaining open, & darted his oral serpent in & out of my mouth quickly, repeatedly, without touching me. 

I moved my hands up from his chest to his neck, bringing my face closer to his, wanting to feel his teasing tongue against mine. He drew his head slightly back, his warm mouth still open, & raised one sharp eyebrow in mock admonishment. 

He sat back fully in his seat & took a hold of my left calf. He pulled off my ankle boot & set it down behind his seat. His stormy eyes locked on my face as he held his palm out to me. I leaned back a little more against the passenger door, lifted my leg, & rested my right ankle in his palm, my eyes also locked to his wickedly handsome face. He removed my other boot, setting it down behind him, next to its mate.

“Take off your stockings.” It was a low raspy tone. And it was an order.

I hesitated for only a moment, but he caught my almost imperceptible pause. His brow lifted again slightly & was accompanied by an almost equally imperceptible tilt of his head that said, “Well? I’m waiting.”

I watched his stormy eyes & moved my hands under my skirt, hooking my thumbs into the waistband of my cotton tights. I kept my eyes on his as I lifted my bottom & slid the leggings down to my thighs. His eyes grew wider with greedy lust as he watched me like a hawk sizing up its prey. 

Setting my butt back down on the leather seat, I moved the tights lower to my calves & lifted my legs a bit to slide them off. Before I could remove them completely, Chris leaned towards me & with a quick tug, pulled my panties down to my knees. His left hand held my legging & underwear tangled legs slightly up & angled towards the windshield. His right palm clutched the underside of my left thigh, pushing it up higher, as his head dipped down to my most intimate parts.

I let out a soft gasp as I felt him gently but firmly bite the cheeks of my ass, before running his warm tongue lewdly up & down my sensitive slit. He adjusted his position & pushed my legs further up towards my chest & again a little towards the rain blurred windshield. He licked the back of my knee & gave it a quick bite before returning his face to my needy folds. 

His demanding mouth latched onto the delicate pink flesh, roughly moving his probing tongue back & forth, up & down. His right hand gripping the back of my left thigh harder, his nails digging into my skin. I whimpered, my hands grabbing the dash & the seat. A double strobe flash of lightning lit up our surroundings immediately followed by a crash of heavy thunder.

I felt him begin to use his teeth in a pleasurable, almost unbearable, nibbling motion & I let out a throaty grunt. My left hand let go of the leather seat & grabbed the back of his head, holding his thick black hair tight. He groaned against my heated flesh, his insistent little nibbles turning into evil little bites. My hip’s movements letting him know exactly what I thought about his talented mouth. My moans showed no signs of modesty. I wanted him. I wanted him in the most animalistic way possible. 

The sensation of the tip of his nose repeatedly nudging my excited little clit as his mouth worked my wet folds, was bringing me quickly to the edge. My needy vocalizations giving away my hurriedly impending destination. Pulls on his hair turned into rough tugs, & a tiny part of my still functioning brain was amazed that I wasn’t hurting him. He grunted deeply against me. Or maybe I was. His grunts now morphing into deep predatory growls. And maybe he liked it. 

He ran his hot tongue up to my quivering little button & flicked it rapidly, over & over again.

“Oh, my God, I’m gonna cum…” My voice desperate & overwhelmed with pleasure.

I let go of his hair & my hand flew to the ceiling of his car, pressing hard against it. The nails of my right hand digging into the leather dash as my back began to arch. My head tilted back & I turned my face slightly, feeling the cold glass of the window against my cheek. The heated breath escaping my open mouth left foggy contrails on the passenger window as I closed my eyes.

“Chrisssss…” His name morphing into an ecstatic hiss as I became another willing victim of the little death.

I cried out loudly, his lips & tongue answering my call with relentless lashings. I bit my lower lip as I swayed between groans & whines, the cold window glass feeling good against my hot skin. The rain pounding his car.

He didn’t stop. His silky lips enveloped my little rose bud, nursing on it with passionate fervor. The intense waves of the first orgasm he’d given me not fully faded before his sensual mouth was demanding a second one from me. My body all too eager to submit to his dominion over my flesh.

That familiar pull in my loins holding all of my attention as it quickly built momentum. My hand dropped from the ceiling & grabbed the shoulder of his black coat as I looked down at him. I couldn’t see his face, only the top of his head moving rhythmically against me. My eyebrows knotted as he again brought me up to the edge, my mouth opening & the only sounds escaping from it were desperate whimpers. 

When I felt him gently bite my sensitive clit I couldn’t hold back any further & groaned deeply as I came for a second time, pulling him to me roughly by the shoulder of his coat, my head dropping back. 

This time he slowed his motions, his lips releasing my sweetly tortured pink button, & I could fully enjoy & focus on the wonderful floating sensation easing through my entire body. My eyes closed lazily in pure bliss & my mind was full of a wonderful nothingness. 

I felt him rest my still clothing entangled legs on his left shoulder as I kept my eyes closed, riding out the last few waves of carnal pleasure. With my eyes still closed, I felt his soft lips press against my mouth, & I didn’t need any encouragement to respond to his deep kiss. 

My arms instinctively wrapped around his long back as I pulled him tightly to me, my legs wanting him between them. As we kissed, I squirmed beneath him trying to wiggle my legs free of their clothing shackles. But with my legs up on his shoulder, my movements were futile. But as he pulled his face back, his lusty expression told me he knew what I wanted.

He kept his face close to mine, his dark blue eyes looking deeply into mine. A brilliant whip of lightning split the dark afternoon, followed by the baritone bellow of thunder. He drew his right hand up to my face & ran his fingertips tenderly across my brow & down my cheek to my chin. His eyes shadowing the movements of his hand. 

His index finger came to rest at the corner of my mouth before gently tracing my lips. My mouth opened slightly & his dark gaze traveled up to my eyes for a moment before dropping back down to my mouth. As he brought his index & middle finger together, he carefully slid the two finger tips between my lips. 

I watched his mouth form a small soft “oh” as he moved his fingers in deeper. My mouth opened a little wider & he held them still at the mid-knuckle point. His still stormy eyes traveled up & down from my lips to my eyes. I closed my warm mouth around his long silky fingers & held gently onto his forearm with both of my hands. My eyes closed as I slowly moved my mouth back & forth, from fingertip to knuckle & back again.

I heard him gasp ever so softly, his breath carrying a delicate quiver. As my tongue slipped between his fingers I heard him undo his belt & zipper. My eyes reopened, heavy with arousal. His left arm’s movements giving away its task, then a moment later that familiar masculine hand rhythim. His motion was unhurried & easy, more of an erotic accompaniment to my oral attention to his fingers than a race to finish. 

After a few tries, my lips were able to match the pace of his self pleasuring & he let out a deep groan. He nodded gently, his mouth slightly open, the quiver in his breath growing a little louder. 

“Please, don’t stop.” His tone was so soft & sincere it was actually sweet.

That familiar loving ache for him passed through my heart & I moved his wet fingers deeper into my mouth. If this was all he wanted today, I was happy to share it with him. 

I could feel his stroking motion speed up, but the growing tension in his face gave away his desire for a more controlled & relaxed pace. I was fascinated by his struggle with himself. His eyebrows knotted as he kept his eyes on my face, a barely audible “fuck” escaping his lips. 

I pulled his fingers slowly out of my mouth & pushed a few strands of his dark hair behind his ear, out of his face. My legs-up position not in sync with the tenderness I felt in my heart for him.

“Do you want to cum now?” My tone was quiet & sincerely caring for such a provocative question.

He scanned my face for a moment & swallowed hard, giving a little shake of his head. His beautiful eyes a dark blue stormy sea.

“Then stop.” My whispered words weren’t met to state the obvious, but instead, oddly enough, to comfort.

He blinked slowly, the knot still furrowing his sleek brow, but the tension in his gaze was lessening. Though he didn’t immediately stop, his rhythmic motion slowed down. He dropped his head & sighed, his hand still moving.

I ran my fingers soothingly through his black hair, in a sense petting him.

“Stop.” I gently repeated the whisper.

He gave a little nod, his head still down, his hand slowing even more until he finally stopped. His sigh was heavy with forced self control. He lifted his head again & looked at me.

“Stopping is only temporary, you know.” His voice a soft warning. 

“I know.” My voice a soft acceptance.

A predatory shadow crossed his sexy face. He leaned in close to me.

“When I bit you, you bled.”

I gave him a single nod.

“Did it hurt?” His eyes narrowed a bit. He wanted the truth, but the anticipatory gleam in his look also wanted to hear me say the word.

“Yes.” My voice small.

I turned my head a little, exposing my neck to him, watching him.

His nostrils flared as he eyed my offering. He then raised his gaze back to my face. 

“It will hurt again.” That gleam quietly sparking. 

I stared silently into those blue flames, thunder vibrating through his car. I reached out & held the back of his head, pulling him to me. His hand came up & cradled the back of my head as he nuzzled the area he had bitten before. I ran both of my hands through his soft hair hoping to encourage him. His warm nuzzles turned into sexy kisses which transformed into naughty licks. As I was swooning in his delicious neck play, he began to focus his licks & nibbles on one spot. 

I moaned softly in anticipation of the sweet pain that was coming & raised up, pressing myself to him. He nuzzled my neck roughly, his playful nibbles becoming sharp predatory nips. My feathery moans responding in higher pitched vocalized winces. My hands still moving through his hair, caressing him. He adjusted his position slightly, leaning more of his weight on me, pushing my knees closer against my chest again, my stocking covered toes bumping against the cold windshield. 

I pushed my neck against his mouth. He moaned into my neck as his teeth came down in a hard bite. I cried out loudly, pain & pleasure whipping my senses, the beginning of one indistinguishable from the end of the other. 

I grabbed his hair & held onto him tightly. Even after the bite was complete, his tongue lapping at the small open wound caused a painful sting. But I didn’t stop him, & I didn’t resist. I simply rested my mouth by his ear & whimpered, “fuck me.”

He let out a loud grunt against my neck & pulled back, his expression animalistic, his eyes glowing with a dark fire. He licked his blood stained lips & moved my entangled legs off his shoulder, pulling off my lowered tights & panties in a single rough motion. 

He sat back up in his seat & reached for me with both hands, firmly holding onto my waist & pulling me onto his lap, facing him. I held onto his broad shoulders & followed his eyes as he looked down between us at his exposed cock. He reached down & pushed the material of his pants further open, giving his thick shaft a few quick strokes. 

I looked back up at his face & saw his jaw moving back & forth while he kept his eyes on his hand. I knew what he was going to do. He brought his palm up to his face & stared unflinchingly into my eyes as he spit loudly into his hand. His head tilted back slightly, his burning eyes holding my gaze as he lowered his palm back to his straining cock, again giving it a few demanding strokes. 

Leaning forward, I gave him a deep kiss. He responded passionately, his left hand gripping my hip, pulling me closer to him, his right hand moving up & down between our bellies. I moved my face back & looked down at his lap. I reached down & pulled his hand off of himself, taking a hold of his large shaft with my fingers. Thunder rumbled through the skies above.

His now released right hand came to rest on my left hip as I lifted up & positioned him beneath me.

“Look at me.” His voice thick & low. 

I lifted my head & did as he instructed. His blue eyes shining with heated desire.

I pressed the velvety tip of his cock against my opening & began to lower myself down on him. A soft gasp floated out of my mouth.

“Don’t look away.” His command bathed in a sultry tone.

I gave a little shake of my head & bit my lower lip as my body eased down every inch of him. My gasping mouth not able to contain my struggle to take all of him, my eyebrows in a little knot of intensity. Keeping my eyes on his as instructed, I held onto his shoulders as I struggled to move myself slowly up & down his girthy length. He lowered his head a bit, those two blue flames not letting me go. 

Rain began to fall harder, the tempo picking up again on the windshield. His fingers dug into my hips, pulling me up & down in a slow, rhythm. His serious expression not able to mask the fact that he was initiating this easy pace only for my benefit. I gasped quietly with genuine pleasure, my soft eyes the polar opposite of his intense direct stare.

He pushed my skirt up around my waist & suddenly gave the side of my ass a quick sharp smack. I let out a small surprised yelp & looked down at his hand. His low voice immediately at my ear.

“What did I say about looking away?” His natural dominance cloaked in a soft tone & gentle accent. 

I turned back to his handsome face, his strong hands continuing to move me rhythmically up & down his large cock. My mind fuzzy with lusty pleasure & the stinging ass slap. My eyelids heavy with the dreamy hypnotic rain. I didn’t want to talk. I wanted to fuck. I ignored his question & leaned my face into his neck, breathing in his scent, a light mix of a men’s fragrance, soap & water & a hint of vape smoke. It drove me crazy. I kissed his neck timidly, repeatedly, tasting his skin.

He moaned, his sharp nails pressing into my hips. But he still wasn’t going to let me ignore him.

“What did I say about looking away?” That same soft dominant tone, this time cloaked in a sexy moan. 

I bit his neck roughly but didn’t break the skin. He let out a loud surprised grunt, followed by another moan that sensually dragged itself out & hung in the air. A quiet “fuck” slipping from his silky lips. My mouth attached itself to a singular spot on his long neck & I began to give him a love bite. I knew I wouldn’t be able to complete it because he & Ulli were scheduled for photos & interviews in the next few days. But that didn’t prevent me from going through the motions. 

After a few moments I reluctantly stopped, so as not to leave a mark on him, & pulled my face back again to look at him. The dark passion wasn’t hidden in his eyes as his gaze roamed over my face. His right hand traveled up my back & slipped into my hair. 

His long fingers wrapped themselves in my rain damp locks & he pulled my hair back firmly. A spark ignited in my eyes & I knew he saw it. Since his hand was busy elsewhere, I rested my palms on his shoulders again & moved myself up & down his length with noticeably more need.

“What did I say about looking away?” That controlled persistence. That quiet relentlessness, combined with his incredibly sexy voice, turned me on like there was no tomorrow.

Those blue torches prowled possessively across my face & his mouth opened slightly as if he were going to bite me. His grip tightened in my hair as his eyes locked onto mine again. I felt his left hand pull my lower half tighter towards him as he rolled his hips up against me pushing his large cock even deeper into me. I groaned deeply & closed my eyes, feeling the limits of how much of him I could take. 

He kept his hold on my hair tight & pressed his lips to my ear, nipping sharply at my earlobe.

“What did I say about looking away?” It was as soft & breathy as a whisper could be before floating into a gossamer nothing. But the menacing seductive tone it bathed in hissed like a demon in my brain.

“Not to look away from your face.” My voice a pleading whimper of desire.

He began to move his hips rhythmically against me & I moaned unashamedly with each upward thrust of his impaling length. My hands pulled & pushed on the shoulders of his black coat, my body trying to gain some leverage on his lap. 

He leaned his seat back a little, allowing me to rest a bit against him. He unwound his fist from my hair but still held the back of my head, bringing my face close to his, kissing me deeply. His kiss was demanding & rough, & I willingly reveled in it. 

His large hands moved to my ass & his nails dug into the cheeks as he pulled me roughly up & down his hard cock. I drew my face back & searched his piercing eyes. All I saw was a black lust.

I slid my hands under his coat, gripping his shoulders again, & my hips began to match his intensity. My eyes boldly held his gaze this time as I showed him exactly what I wanted.

He tilted his head back & closed his eyes, moaning openly, his sharp nails leaving stinging claw marks on the cheeks of my ass. His moans started turning into half whimpers & I knew he was close.

I changed my motion from riding to grinding & his groan was guttural. He lifted his head & his brow was knotted, his expression almost angry looking. This time he ran both of his hands through my hair, wrapping my locks tightly around both fists. My head moved back a little but I didn’t stop rotating my lower half firmly on his lap.

He closed his eyes tightly for a moment & let out a stifled gasp. His eyes reopened & I could see his control slipping away. My fingers dug into his shoulders over his soft black sweater & it was my turn to be relentless. 

“Shit…” His tone slightly helpless. His voice a low quiver.

He pulled my head back, fully exposing the front of my neck to him. His warm wet tongue licked up my throat, over my chin & across my partially open mouth.

“I have to discipline you for disobeying me.” A growing urgency in his tone.

Lost in my own pleasure, & with both of his hands holding my head back, I nodded as much as I could.

He finally released my hair & his hands fell onto my thighs, his fingers gripping them tightly. His head tilted back again.

“Fuuuuuck…” A drawn out throaty warning from him.

I held onto the backs of his hands with mine & watched his damp face as I sped up. He raised his head back up, his sleek brow full of tension, & his eyes on mine. He moved one of his hands off my thigh & slipped it under my sweater, roughly squeezing & caressing my breasts over my bra. 

He took a sudden sharp intake of breath & tossed his head back quickly, his chest rising up. He emitted a loud grunt...then another...then one more, before lifting his head, mouth open, & looking at me. He wrapped his long arms tightly around me & I felt a shudder move through his body. He let out several soft grunts in rapid succession & pulled his upper half back, looking down between us. 

I stroked the back of his head & tried to see what he was looking at. His breathing started to slow. He looked back at me, his blue eyes soft again. He was just enjoying the moment. I leaned forward & gave him a sweet kiss on the lips & he returned it gently. The afterglow of many soft kisses, the still steady rainfall & the quiet comfort of our still connected bodies, made me feel more at peace than I had in a long time.

He carefully ran his fingers through my hair, finger combing loose strands out of my face.

“They’re going to wonder what happened to us.” That wonderfully familiar low, soft tone & sweet expression. 

He reached under my sweater & gingerly straightened my askewed bra. His smirk & tone were playful.

“Just putting the toys back in their box.”

He pulled out his hands & neatly tucked my hiked up sweater back down, smoothing out the material. I let out a little laugh & his smile was sweet & shy.

He smoothed back his hair with his left hand & yawned. 

“I’m sorry. I’m just so relaxed right now, I could easily go to sleep.”

I kissed his cheek & then his chin, feeling more for him than I wanted to admit.

“Come back to my place. It’s closer to here than your home. We can take a nap.” I couldn’t hide the hopefulness in my words. And my grin didn’t exactly help.

He eyed me gently & with great care. His expression as soft as his smile. He brushed his thumb against my cheek.

“That sounds like a perfect afternoon with you. But I have a lot of things I have to get done with Ulli & Mario this week. You’ve been such a big help getting me, all of us really, caught up. I don’t want to waste that & fall behind again.”

He moved his thumb up to my brow & gently stroked it. His eyes big & asking if I understood.

I knew how important this new album was to him. He was a perfectionist when it came to his music. And putting something out to the public & the fans that didn’t sit 100% right with him was not an option. Music wasn’t just his work. It was his life. And I was being immature & selfish. 

I smiled sheepishly.

“Yes, of course. I’m sorry. I’m just being silly. I absolutely understand.”

The warmth in his eyes was also in his gentle smile & voice.

“Thank you, Maddy.”

He lowered his hand from my face, a brightness returning to his mood.

“Besides… If we did go back to your place now, I still wouldn’t get any sleep. And neither would you. Muahahahahaaa…”

I let out a loud laugh at his evil little laugh. He chuckled softly, that beautiful sparkle lighting up his eyes.

He helped me off his lap & I sat back in my seat. As he tucked himself back into his pants, I slipped on my panties & tights again & tried to smooth my tousled hair back into place. I looked at myself in the visor mirror. Messy hair, kiss swollen lips with a little remaining lipstick stain, smudged eyeliner. I looked rumpled. No, I looked like I just had sex. I looked in the mirror again. No, I look like I just had sex in a car. Maybe it’s, Maybelline. I sighed. 

“Ach (Oh)...” A touch of exaggerated exasperation in Chris’ voice as he reached in front of me & opened the glove box. 

He removed a small pink hairbrush & motioned with his index finger, & a quick whistle, for me to turn around. I turned in my seat, my back towards him, & he began to brush my hair. A smile quickly spread across my entire face.

“Looks like Viki keeps her hairbrush in the glove box, too, like I do.”

“It’s mine.”

I let out a surprised laugh then stopped.

“Sorry.” I tried to sound sincere. But I still wanted to laugh.

He explained as he expertly brushed my "sex hair" back into place. It felt good.

“Ulli & I were on our way to an interview where there would not be any makeup or hair people. We would do our own at home, beforehand. We got there early & decided to get some coffee & something to eat.”

Chris smoothed the sides of my hair gently back as he brushed, & I couldn’t stop smiling as I listened to his story.

“We get our stuff, we’re going back to the car & it starts to rain hard. We didn’t have an umbrella & were not parked close to the shop, so the rain messed up our hair.” 

He carefully brushed out the tangles from the ends.

“Neither of us had a comb, or brush, nothing. We stop by a store, I jump out, run in, but the lane, aisle, that has the hair stuff is all crazy, like, they’re remodeling it or something. They only have one container of combs & brushes & they are all pink for some reason. So…”

Chris dangles the pink hairbrush in front of my face. I turn back around to face him & still couldn’t stop smiling. Not so much for the brush itself, but for the fact that he just brushed my hair. And I loved it.

I thanked him & he returned the brush back to the glove box. Once I wiped off the smeared makeup, we exited his car & stepped out into a very light drizzle outside. He walked me to my car & shut the door after I got in. 

He crouched down by my door, ran his hand through his hair & squinted a little against the rain sprinkles. I started up the engine.

“Oh, just so you know…”

He gave me a conspiratory look, his voice matching the sneaky look on his face.

“Gared told me that Harms is practicing with video games to prepare for our little upcoming party.”

Chris placed his long index finger against his lips to indicate this was secret information. I started grinning again.

“Ja (Yes), so… Gared told me Harms even bought a new system, the PlayStation 4.”

I opened my eyes wide in mock disbelief. Chris nodded eagerly, playing along.

“Can you believe such a thing? Gared said Harms doesn’t want us to know, & when he shows up he’s going to act like he doesn’t know how to play.”

I let out a shocked gasp. Chris narrowed his eyes suspiciously & nodded very slowly this time,

“Exactly. Tsk, tsk, tsk, Herr (Mr) Harms. So I think, maybe, we should all practice a little bit, too, ja (yes)?”

I nodded enthusiastically in full agreement.

“I will definitely practice & bring my A game.”

Chris grinned & laughed softly.

“Good girl.”

He stood back up & leaned down to my open window.

“Ok, you’re free to fly now. Call me when you get home. You know, the rain & …”

I finished his sentence.

“Everything.”

I gave him a big smile. He smirked & shook his head. Before I drove off, I did have one more question for him, though.

“Are you still going to discipline me?” My tone playful & teasing.

He stared at me, the funny little smirk fading. The sparkle in his eyes transforming into a wolfish gleam. And his gaze slowly boring into me like a massive drill.

“Yes.”

His single quiet word to me punctuated by equally quiet thunder. 

“Call me when you get home.” The same quiet tone.

His penetrating gaze slid to my mouth then flashed back up to my eyes. He leaned in & softly kissed my lips, the sweetness of that gesture in direct opposition to the predatory look in his eyes. He straightened up & stepped back from my car, watching me. 

I gave him a gentle smile.

“Ciao.” I barely heard my own voice.

“Ciao.” His voice low, like a big cat purring.

His eyes not looking, but watching.

A shiver ran up my spine but I wasn’t sure why. Arousal? Excitement? Anticipation?

Apprehension?

As I finally drove off, I kept glancing at him in my mirrors. The rain sprinkles began to turn into a rain shower again. He continued to watch me. I turned the corner & lost sight of him.

As I made my way home, I began to get excited again about the upcoming game night at Chris’ place. I already knew it was going to be a lot of fun. But first, I would find out what my curious Goth employer, & now my shared lover, meant by “disciplining” me. And that same uneasy, but strangely delicious, little shiver slowly crawled its way up my spine again.


	17. Friday I'm In Love

The next two weeks flew by, & before I knew it, it was Friday, the day before Chris’ much anticipated video game party.

I was stuck in traffic on my way to the studio & I called Chris to let him know that I would be late this morning. He told me he just found out that the city is doing repair work on some underground power lines & that’s what’s causing the backup. He also told me that he was currently stuck in the same traffic mess, but just in a different location than me, so he was going to use this downtime to return a few calls. Before we hung up, he added that who ever got to the studio first would get the coffee started before doing anything else. I laughed.

“Before ANYTHING else?” My tone upbeat as I teased him.

“Before ANYYYYYthing else. I don’t care if the studio is on fire.” His morning voice soft & raspy.

“Just grab the coffee maker & run.” I couldn’t help but giggle at the image of one of us running out of a burning building clutching his beloved Kaffeemaschine & nothing else. Expensive computers & studio equipment be damned.

“Mmmmm… Genau, genau (Exactly, exactly).” His low, sleepy, drawn out purr making my heart skip a beat.

I arrived at the studio before he did, not surprising, since I lived closer to it than him. Once inside, & after getting settled, I tackled the coffee making duty with familiar ease, smiling the entire time. How he loved his kaffee. I noted on my to-do list that he was running low on milk & sugar. I checked the studio refrigerator & also wrote down a case of bottled water, a single litre bottle of Coca-Cola, a few single cans of Coke, & one case of beer (Desperado). 

I ended up checking all the supplies, & by the time I was done my list included: paper towels, air freshener, liquid hand soap (moisturizing), hand lotion, dish soap (gentle on hands & nails - I smiled), computer screen cleaner, facial tissues, throat lozenges (assorted flavors - he liked variety - I smirked), rewetting eye drops, one bag of hard candies (assorted), one package of highlighters (assorted colors), one box of Band-Aids (for sexy finger boo boos), one bottle of antacid tablets (fruit flavored - chewable), two bottles of rum (Havana, yellow label), one bottle of Havana 7, & finally, a couple of boxes of his favorite cookies. I let out a little puff of breath & scratched my temple with the pen. Looks like I was going to have to do a little shopping this afternoon. 

I also checked the daily work to-do list that Chris had sent me & noticed it was fairly light today. A couple of local errands, a post office stop, a visit to the dry cleaners to pick up two of his suits & a few of his dress shirts, a quick swing by Out Of Line to pick up samples of new band merchandise for Chis to look over, & that was about it. This relatively easy day would work perfectly with the supply shopping I wanted to do for the studio. Even though it looked like I was going to be battling the tied up traffic, at least the weather had cleared up nicely & I wouldn’t have to deal with all the storms & rain we’ve been having. I may end up getting frustrated with the traffic today, but at least I would be dry. Frustrated but dry. A good workday in Berlin in my book. I couldn’t help but smile a little. I was happy.

I put my phone back into the pocket of my hoodie & when I turned around I was facing a warm paper bag just a couple of inches from my face. The bag smelled like something yummy was in there but all my eyes saw was the brown color of the bag.

Chris let out a quiet laugh & pulled the bag away from my now crossed eyes.

“I’ve been looking over your shoulder for two minutes & you haven’t noticed.” His voice still carried that same soft raspiness from our short conversation on the drive in. 

He set down two paper sacks on the low coffee table & pulled off his black leather gloves as he straightened back up. Although the rain clouds had moved on for now, & a bright sun rested in the crisp blue morning sky, the temperature was still on the cold side.

He tucked his gloves into the pockets of his thigh length, black leather coat & then slipped the beautiful coat off his shoulders, eyeing me quietly, the faint traces of morning sleepiness giving his face a peaceful, relaxed look. 

As he hung up his things, I peaked inside one of the bags & the delicious aroma of something warm & savory teased my nose & my empty stomach.

His long elegant fingers fluttered in front of my curious eyes, playfully shooing me away from the edible goodies hidden inside the bags. I smirked at him, & as he carefully unpacked the food, I poured him a cup of hot coffee but left it black, not knowing if this was one of his black-coffee-mornings or not. I handed him the cup as he set out the last take-out container.

“Thank you.” His voice was quiet.

He straightened up again, taking a careful sip of the hot liquid, letting out a whispered, relieved “ahh”. Apparently it was a black-coffee-morning. 

“Please…” He motioned to the boxed up goodies as he took another small sip & headed over to his usual work station, a cluttered table with a couple of computers. He sat down with a sigh, turned the computers on, then sat back in his rolling office chair, crossing one long leg over the other at the knee, making himself comfortable. The coffee cup cradled by both of his hands as he sipped slowly, his still slightly drowsy eyes moving from me to the monitor screens, then back to me again. 

I eagerly opened all the containers & my eyes & nose were greeted with an assortment of breakfast goodies: scrambled eggs, pan fried potatoes, small chubby sausage links, an assortment of thinly sliced cold cuts & cheeses, & the always popular paper sack of warm, freshly baked rolls. My stomach growled & Chris chuckled quietly.

I retrieved a couple of plates, utensils & napkins from the “kitchen”, a counter with a small sink, a few upturned clean mugs, & a roll of paper towels. I placed one empty plate in the microwave & heated it for 30 seconds.

My long & lanky employer eyed me curiously as he took another sip of his coffee.

“You must have worked in a restaurant at some point.” His gradually brightening blue eyes beginning to show the revitalizing effects of the hot black liquid.

I smiled at him as I prepared my coffee.

“I was a waitress for a short while, just six months. Then I got my first personal assistant job & left the restaurant. But it gave me good experience on how to deal with all kinds of people. Especially the difficult or demanding ones.” I rolled my eyes jokingly & taste tested my caramel colored steaming concoction. 

Chris’ eyes narrowed slightly as he looked at me over the rim of his mug, taking another slow sip.

I removed the very warm plate from its beeping cage, went back over to the food laden table & scanned my eyes quickly over all the tasty looking offerings. I looked up & smiled at him again.

“What would you like?” My voice relaxed yet upbeat. 

My Goth employer’s brow raised up in surprise.

“You’re going to serve me?” His questioning tone carrying genuine delight.

My smile grew wider.

“Of course. I’m going to dazzle you with my waitressing skills.” I made no attempt to hide the humor in my voice or on my face.

The now much less sleepy musician grinned.

“Toll (Great/Wonderful)!”

“So, what would you like this morning?” 

Chris set down his mug, shifted in his chair, & recrossed his legs in the other direction. He rubbed his unshaven chin, a contemplative look in his blue eyes.

“Hmm… I think I will have the eggs & two of the sausages.” His tone playful, but also teasingly serious in his breakfast selections.

“Excellent choices.” I gave him a small, polite, acknowledging tip of the head & proceeded to fill the plate with his order.

The noticeably amused singer let out a muffled laugh.

As I began to make my way over to him, he interjected with an addition to his selections.

“Oh, und eine Brötchen, bitte (& a small roll, please).”

I stopped my approach, giving him another courteous tip of the head, went back to the table, added one roll, turned, & began my second approach.

Chris let out a loud chuckle & shook his head. I stifled my own laugh & tried to keep my calm, professional demeanor in tact.

I set the still warm plate down next to him on the table, & then brought him the silverware & some napkins. He silently watched me with his sparkling eyes & I could tell he was trying not to laugh again. 

I returned to him a third time & refilled his coffee, bringing along the milk & sugar this time, just in case. He sat back comfortably in his chair with his long fingers gently clasped, his hands resting on his belly.

I gave him a pleasant look.

“Will there be anything else, Sir?”

A smile escaped & curled up one side of his mouth as he looked at me.

“Um...no… I’m good right now, thank you.” His gently accented voice soft & dusted with humor.

“You’re welcome. I’ll be back shortly to check on things. My name is Maddy. If you need anything just let me know.” I flashed him a little teeth & went back to return the coffee pot & to fill my own plate.

The dam finally gave way, & Chris let out a loud laugh.

“Maddy, Maddy, Maddy…” His tone soft but filled with good humor.

We spent the next little while eating & talking, our relaxed conversation meandering over several topics. As he ate & checked his numerous messages & emails, the subject matter jumped around from the upcoming new album, to his childhood, to his first car, to my childhood, to my first boyfriend, to his first girlfriend, to next year’s tour for the new album, to next year’s summer concert schedule, to shoes, & back to music again. 

These were truly my favorite moments with him. Just Chris being Chris. Not Chris Pohl. Not Pohl. Just Chris. As we talked, I enjoyed watching his facial expression. Those sleek, animated brows punctuating his sentences. His mouth shifting between shy smiles, full grins, knowing smirks, & thoughtful purses. His clear blue eyes widening with glowing excitement, or narrowing darkly with a contemplative idea, or a deeper, more serious thought. 

As the conversation easily returned to music, I set my empty plate down on the low coffee table & sat back deeply into the couch. I sipped the last of my second cup of coffee, watching those beautiful hands of his add movement to his description of their first music video, which was now in post production, & would debut with the first single off the new album. He was calmly excited & relaxingly happy. Chris being Chris. And I knew how lucky I was to be a part of his world. But for how much longer? 

I was hired to help him with errands & more personal related duties, so he could free up his time to get caught up on some things in the studio & to focus on this new album & planning their new big tour next year. The album was now complete & fully in the post production phase with the first single & video scheduled to be released soon. I wouldn’t be going on tour with them, there was simply no reason for me to. Although his record label consented to paying my salary in full for the first few months, to help ensure their golden Goth goose had the time he needed to deliver another top selling album, Chris had been paying me out of his own pocket once the last song had been written, & the label gladly, & swiftly, handed me fully back to Chris, financially speaking. 

The day my paychecks were no longer being signed by the payroll department at his label, & instead were now signed by him personally, I told him I could afford a cut in pay & it would not be a problem for me to have him renegotiate my salary. I did this because I knew that the label didn’t always pay for every expense associated with the albums or tours. And because Chris refused to compromise on his music, he regularly paid out of pocket for all sorts of things. 

He also had to make some tough business decisions when it came to the concerts & other live performances. New tours to support a brand new studio album also meant some new expenses that the label didn’t always agree with. It sometimes simply boiled down to a drawn out verbal chess match between him & the executives, with each side having about an equal number of wins & “adjustments”. 

Chris always tried to have a good attitude about these business skirmishes, putting as much of a positive spin on things as he could. But in his eyes, quietly, privately, you could see the toll it took on him sometimes. He didn’t like compromising artistically for his music. He never did. If he wanted a live performance to be executed in a certain way, then the label be damned. But as the popularity of his bands grew, especially with Blutengel, he quickly realized it wouldn’t always be that easy. And that at the end of the day, sometimes, you just simply had to play ball their way for a few innings & keep your focus on the entire season rather than just one game. 

And that’s where I thought I could do my small part by taking a not too drastic, but hopefully still helpful, cut in pay. Chris had listened to my suggestion in his usual patient & relaxed manner, giving me that soft sweet smile I knew so well, before giving me his gentle one word reply, “No.”

He explained that although he thought my offer was generous, he was doing ok financially & that paying me wasn’t causing him any additional stress. But what would cause him additional stress would be worrying if I was having difficulty paying my rent, or other bills, due to a cut in my salary. He reminded me that Berlin was an expensive city to live in & wouldn’t suddenly become less expensive because I was making less money. It would just become less appealing. And if it became less appealing, then I might consider moving to a lower rent neighborhood. And lower rent neighborhoods in a big city often meant higher crime rates, especially property thefts & muggings. And the thought of possible property thefts & muggings meant more sleepless nights for him. And more sleepless nights for him meant a more disagreeable & cranky boss for me the next day. And the more disagreeable & cranky he was meant I might get fed up with his shit & find another job. 

With a slightly exasperated “please don’t make me go through all that” plea on his face, he then asked if I was following his logic. All I could do was chuckle & shake my head. I couldn’t hide the genuine heartfelt affection I had for this wonderful man. Yes. I followed his logic.

I smiled to myself as I returned to the present day, & set my empty cup down on the table. Even though we both had plenty to eat, there was still a lot of food left. Chris explained that Mario would be here in about an hour & that he was bringing Conrad, their touring keyboard player, with him, & Chris had told them he would bring in breakfast for everyone. 

I stood up & stretched, feeling comfortably full from all the good food & happy that the two cups of coffee I had was keeping the threatening food coma at bay. I had things to get done this morning & I didn’t want to do them feeling sluggish & sleepy.

Chris stretched his long body while still sitting in his chair & he resembled a big limp rag doll when he was done, arms & legs everywhere, his head angled & resting on one of his shoulders. 

“The food was good & now I’m full & I want to go back to bed.” His voice low & flirting with the same food coma I had avoided. He smiled lazily at me. 

I returned the smile & brought the still hot coffee pot over to him, pouring him another cup of liquid encouragement. He gave me a sweet look.

“Thank you. I think this cup will do it.” He slowly sat back up in his chair, running his fingers through his dark hair, & took a careful sip of the steaming beverage.

I set the coffee pot back in its home & washed up the few dishes, my boss’ gaze moving back & forth between me & his dual computer screens. 

As Chris made a phone call, I made a quick stop in the bathroom to freshen up before I was off to tackle the crisp, cool day. I reapplied a bit of rosy colored lip gloss to add some additional life into my mostly awake face, & felt confident that the snap of cold air that awaited me outside would add a little natural blush to my currently warm cheeks. After a few finger combing swipes through my hair, & a final glance in the mirror, I pumped a single squirt of kiwi scented hand lotion into my palm & reemerged feeling a bit more pulled together after the morning feast.

“Maddy Madeline.”

My eyes flew up from my lotion rubbing hands. 

Gordon stood before me, leaning back against Chris’ desk, long legs crossed at the ankles, long arms folded relaxingly across his chest, plain black baseball cap snug on his head. Just the way I’d found him here in the studio, that first time I’d met him over a year ago. 

I made no attempt to hide my surprise, or my happiness, at seeing him again. The big grin on my face stretching from ear to ear as I quickly trotted over to him. As my arms wrapped around him, he bent down & gave me an enveloping bear hug, lifting me up as he kissed my cheek.

As he set me back down, I kissed his cheek in return, his grin broad, his eyes warm. The last time I’d seen him was our one night together over two weeks ago. Since then, we had tried a couple of times to get together for a quick workday lunch or a friendly dinner-&-a-movie night out, but our plans always fell through due to last minute scheduling conflicts. I missed my friend. And from the look on his smiling face, I dare say he might have missed me a little, too.

“Gordon!” My voice fully showing the pleasure in finding him here. 

The ever so tall Goth chuckled as he leaned his butt back against my employer’s work station. He rested his palms on the table, the warmth in his eyes extending to his gentle smile.

“Hallo, Maddy.” His low tone soft.

“Hi, Gordon, what brings you here? We haven’t been able to get together in over two weeks, & now you just pop up.” My own voice clearly showing my excitement in seeing him again, but also wondering why we had allowed a few pesky scheduling hiccups to prevent a simple lunch date.

My eyes big & gently questioning. 

As I looked up at Gordon, I felt something touch the back of my legs. I turned my head & saw that Chris had rolled up a chair behind me, holding it still, offering me a seat.

“Maybe you should sit before you fall over from looking up at this giant tree.” The dark haired singer’s tone helpful as he smiled teasingly at me, then up at his long time friend.

I let out a little laugh as I sat down. Chris used his foot as a brake on one of the mobile chair’s wheels until I got comfortable. 

Gordon gave his former band mate a dismissive look at the “giant tree” remark, then shifted his bright eyes back to me.

“Ja (Yes), I’m sorry we had such a difficult time getting together these past few weeks. I really did want to see you. Just work & everything. She wants to get back together on Montag (Monday). Doesn’t want to on Dienstag (Tuesday). Wants to fuck on Mittwoch (Wednesday). And then it’s ‘fuck you, Gordon’ on Donnerstag (Thursday). My life.”

The TC bassist & Miss Construction singer sighed. The warm smile still in place but noticeably battling with a more sarcastic one.

Gordon eyed me carefully, as if trying to read my thoughts on what he’d just said. I kept my eyes on his face & gave him a soft smile. 

Chris settled back in his office chair, stretching out his long legs, crossing his ankles. He picked up his vaping device from the desk & took a few puffs, tipping his head back, releasing a long, slow, white stream of vapor up towards the ceiling. He remained quiet as he followed the conversation. 

“Today is Friday. How is she feeling today?” My question was sincere. 

I didn’t like the fact that he felt frustrated that his relationship with his girlfriend was so mutable. But I remember him saying that they were very much alike in personality & demeanor, & that’s what initially brought them together, seeing so much of themselves in each other. They both felt like they had found a kindred spirit in the other. But he also said that’s what caused them problems in their relationship, that at times they were too alike. They knew how to push each other’s buttons with deadly precision to inflict the most pain. And when they were arguing, sometimes even over the most stupid things, they both weren’t shy about pushing those buttons. Their long relationship a constant cycle of push & pull. Attract & repel, & attract again. 

“Friday she’s in love.” Gordon’s statement delivered with a flatness that carried just a blush of venom.

He paused to see if I caught on. I kept looking up at him while he silently looked down at me. Waiting. Chris set down his vaping device & picked up his phone. His long index finger slid smoothly across the screen, & after a few taps I heard The Cure’s, Friday I’m In Love bounce happily out. 

The light bulb moment was written all over my face & all I could do was shake my head after walking...no, running head long, into that one. Gordon let out a low laugh & Chris nudged my shoulder with his elbow. When I turned to face my attention seeking employer, he held up his phone to my eyes & softly sang along with the venerable Mr. Robert Smith. 

“I don’t care if Monday’s blue   
Tuesday’s grey & Wednesday too   
Thursday I don’t care about you   
It’s Friday I’m in love…”

Gordon shook his head as his chuckles mixed with a light hearted groan of “ain’t that the truth” acceptance. I rolled my eyes at Chris & pushed his phone out of my face as he laughed quietly, obviously quite pleased with himself. 

I looked back up at Gordon.

“So, she’s in love with you again today, because it’s Friday?” 

“No. She told me I’m a big asshole & then she left to go stay with one of her girlfriends.” 

Chris let out a loud snort followed by a laugh. Gordon looked at his friend & shook his head again, also letting out a snort of laughter that was dressed in a brilliant shade of “can you believe this shit?”

“Ach (Oh)...” Gordon’s low key exclamation sounded more like a resigned sigh than a word.

The bassist adjusted the black cap on his head & leaned his head a little to one side as his bright blue eyes traveled back to me.

“So, Maddy Madeline, how have you been?” His quiet tone sincerely curious. 

I filled him in on the mostly mundane goings-on in my little world, but leaving out any information about the new relationship dynamics between Chris, Viki & myself. I assumed if Chris wanted Gordon to know the details he would tell him himself. Otherwise, to be totally honest, I was still trying to work out the details in my own head & heart. 

Gordon watched my face silently as I regaled him with my humdrum exploits, occasionally giving me an attentive nod or a small acknowledging smile. 

His kind eyes stayed on me until I could no longer see them. 

Something dark was carefully placed over my eyes, cutting off my vision, dropping me into sudden nightfall. I let out a soft surprised gasp, my fingers fluttering up to my covered eyes, as I felt a strip of material being gently tied behind my head. My questioning fingertips danced lightly across the soft fabric barrier that blocked my sight. 

“Chris?” The lilt in my voice searched for him, but it contained no trace of panic or fear, only a surprised wonderment. 

I felt his familiar silky fingers glide across my cheek, his thumb giving my forehead a gentle stroke before trailing feathery light down the right side of my face. Even though I wasn’t sure what was going on, I still couldn’t prevent a small smile from forming on my lips at the caring touch of his hand.

His fingertips held my chin lightly as his soft lips brushed against mine, the barely there hint of a sweet kiss carried away too soon by his warm breath, his silver lip ring just a teasing graze. My hands reached out tentatively & came into contact with his chest, the zipper of his sweater cold against my searching fingers. I ran my palms slowly up & down his chest a couple of times, enjoying the solid feel of him & the warmth of his body coming through his clothing. 

His hands covered the backs of mine as he took a hold of them. I felt him stand up & gently coax me up with him. Without letting go of my hands, he carefully moved them behind me & held them against my lower back, pulling me tighter to him. I instinctively turned my head & nuzzled his chest with the side of my face. I felt safe in his possessive hold. 

“Vertraust du mir (Do you trust me), Maddy?” Chris’ low voice serious in its question, but tender in its delivery. 

Even though I couldn’t see him, I looked up at him & nodded.

“Yes, I trust you.” My quiet reply an honest answer. 

His warm fingers gave my captive hands a gentle squeeze at my show of confidence in him. He pressed his lips against the top of my head & held them there for several moments. I couldn’t help but smile at his loving gesture. 

But in that silent, sweet moment that we shared, I also knew that he was opening a door to an exotic new world for me. A door he was giving me a chance to keep closed & to walk away from, with the pause of that sweet lingering kiss on the top of my head. 

He let go of my hands & straightened back up. The sudden, physical disconnect from him causing a reactive mew to squeak from my lips. My hands immediately reached out & I took an unsure half step forward, my body coming into contact with him again. I wrapped my arms around him, pressing myself against him, nuzzling his chest again with the side of my face. Encircling his protective arms around me, he pulled me tightly into him once more, exhaling slowly & deeply. 

He closed the door quietly behind me as I voluntarily stepped through. Once again, I was Alice. But this time, instead of entering his studio for the first time, I was venturing into the most carefully guarded place in his world. His dark, private Wonderland.


	18. Trust Exotica

Chris held me quietly for a few more moments. A silent wave of inevitability building in the peaceful stillness of the room. Although I couldn’t predict what was in store for me, I knew without a doubt, it was going to change me. It was going to change my relationship with Chris. 

He slowly unwrapped his arms from around me, only stepping away after I felt Gordon’s hand on my back, steadying me. My own hands, once again, instinctively reached out for Chris as he moved quietly from me. 

Gordon’s other hand came up & I felt him offer his upturned palm to me to hold onto. He must have known that my blindfolded state would leave me feeling a little unbalanced. I gladly took a hold of his warm hand with both of mine. 

“He’s not far from you, just on the other side of the room.” Gordon’s voice was comforting.

I felt the movement of air in front of me, then I felt the graze of Chris’ sharp nail tips as he delicately stroked my jaw. My face automatically angled itself upwards at the pleasant, almost ticklish sensation.

“Open your mouth.” My employer’s command was issued gently, but the confident firmness wasn’t lost on me.

I did as he instructed, parting my lips enough to, perhaps, receive a small spoonful of ice cream.

“A little wider.” The same gentle commanding tone.

Opening my mouth a bit wider, I knew full & well a frozen treat wasn’t going to be involved.

I felt something solid, smooth, & a touch slick, brush against my bottom lip. My mouth slipped halfway around the curved surface as it was partially eased in. It was a ball gag. 

I’d seen them before in movies & videos, & a few of them ended up as party favors at a crazy Las Vegas bridal shower I attended a couple of years ago. Myself & the other shower guests had eagerly tried them on, spending most of the time laughing & taking questionable selfies. This time with Chris it was more than a little different. 

He paused for a moment as the gag settled in place, then carefully buckled two straps snugly behind my head. I pressed on the small ball with my tongue, there was some give in the tension but not much.

Once the device was set in place to Chris’ satisfaction, he ran his fingertips languidly back & forth across one of the straps, softly brushing his long fingers against my cheek. I turned my face towards his hand, enjoying his gentle touch. 

With my eyes covered & mouth filled, a different type of arousal began to move through me. Something I hadn’t felt before. It was intriguingly soft & subtle, but electrically charged at the same time. And knowing that Gordon was watching only turned up the voltage.

Chris’ delicate caresses on my face floated up to my eyes. His fingertips barely touching the blindfold but with just enough pressure so that I could feel them glide across my closed eyelids. One of his silky fingers trailed as soft as a whisper down my nose, floating away at the tip. A moment later, three of his exploring fingertips slipped ethereally over my parted lips & the ball gag. The softest gasp escaping from his mouth.

“So fucking beautiful.” The heat in his voice scorching his breathy whisper.

I felt Gordon give my hands a squeeze at the sound of his friend’s voice, my hands still holding onto his. His silent observation adding a sensually surreal feel to everything.

In a very quiet voice, & in German, Chris asked Gordon to move a stack of folders, & few other things off his desk. The bassist gently unclasped my hands from his. I turned my head towards the sound of rustling papers, & after a few quick moments, Chris carefully turned me away from him, snaking his arm around my waist. 

He took a couple of short steps & bent me forward over the edge of his desk. I let out a muffled grunt at the sudden change in position, & my hands automatically braced my upper half against the table. Before my mind could catch up with what was happening to my body, I felt his fingers dip into the waistband of my black sweatpants & panties, roughly tugging them down in unison to my thighs. 

I let out another muffled grunt & turned my face to the side, resting my cheek against the cold table. My mind was spinning an array of lewd images of what I might look like right now. Both of these men had seen me naked, yes, but not together at the same time, & not like this.

Chris’ strong hand gave my right ass cheek a firm caress & a single hard grab.

“Don’t move.” His order was relaxed but firm as I heard him step away from me. 

I remained still, but the warmth of my exposed delicate areas meeting the cool air of the studio caused me to draw my legs tightly together. 

“He’s right. You look so fucking beautiful right now.” Gordon’s low voice laced with the same animal heat in Chris’.

I turned my head in his direction, resting the other side of my face back down on the table. The dark blindfold did allow specks of filtered light to seep through but not enough to be useful. Gordon ran the backs of his fingers tenderly across my temple & cheek. My hand reached out & bumped into his thigh, he was sitting on the desk.

As Chris returned next to me, I turned my head once more in his direction. He gently stroked my head but his hand felt different. He gave my forehead the same gentle strokes & I felt the cool, supple leather of his glove. My pulse sped up.

“Do you want to know what it looks like? The gag?” Gordon’s quiet inquiry sincerely caring in its intent.

I kept my head facing in Chris’ direction & nodded. 

“It’s a nice simple one. The two main leather straps are matte black, & are connected to the smaller black leather straps holding the ball by two silver D-rings.”

As Gordon described the restrictive device in the same quiet tone, Chris remained silent, his gloved hand trailing from my forehead to my chin, giving it a couple of slow, back & forth sweeps with his thumb.

“The single small clasp, where it’s buckled behind your head, is also silver. The ball is a smaller one & bright red. But they do come in other sizes & colors.”

Chris gently swept his gloved thumb across my lower lip. A shiver discreetly perked up my nipples beneath my pullover sweater & zipped up hoodie. I wanted to lick my lips but the gag was busy teaching me it’s first lesson about restriction. 

Chris’ hand slid down from my face & gave my upper back a gentle massaging rub. I let out a small moan at the pleasant sensation. He extended the relaxing rub to my lower back, spreading his fingers wide as his large palm moved soothingly back & forth just above my bare bottom.

I felt more exposed, more naked to him in this bent over position than I did being in bed with him. In bed I had nothing on. Here, now, I was at least fully covered from the waist up & from mid-thigh down. Yet… 

Maybe it was more about the position, being bent over like this. Being on display. Not just for his private visual pleasure, but also for another man’s, too. And maybe also because this wasn’t happening at night behind closed bedroom doors. But instead, in the middle of a bright crisp morning, in the middle if his well lit studio. His day in, day out work area. His office. His sanctuary. His church. His confessional. Where the spiritual & mundane coexist. Where family, friends & fans have come by to visit him, to their & his delight.

Maybe because of something darker.

I felt his glove trail down to my ass, then his long middle finger continued easily down the center part, pushing my thighs apart, curving under & sliding up along my sensitive slit, bumping with a gentle purpose into my awakening clit. 

I gasped against the little red ball gag & raised up on my toes at the sudden intimate touch. 

He let out a breathy sigh at the sound of my gasp & began to work his leather clad fingertip in tiny teasing circles on my swelling little button. 

My back automatically arched, pressing my belly tight against the table. I gasped again, my palms flat on the table surface as I pushed my upper half up. Chris’ other hand immediately wrapped around the front of my neck, holding it with firm control, causing my head to tilt upward. His insistent fingertip danced on my excited pink bud like a whirling dervish, igniting my lust. I moaned out loud to let him know how good it felt but that strict little red ball translated my moans into another series of muffled grunts, making me sound more like a feral animal in heat. But I didn’t care. In a few more exquisite moments, he would have me cumming hard again. The way he always did. 

I felt that delicious tension build quickly inside me & pushed myself back against his talented finger to signal to him that I was close & wanted more. I knew he understood what I wanted as he immediately increased both the speed & intensity of his dancing middle finger. I tried to strain up higher on the tips of my toes, my hips wiggling against his hand. My right hand clutched Gordon’s thigh as my imminent orgasm began to peak.

Chris stopped.

A rapid mix of distraught whimpers & whines fell from my mouth, all morphing into that same muffled grunt, this time just drawn out. He removed his hand from between my legs. His other gloved hand remained clasped to the front of my throat, his fingers gently squeezing & releasing, squeezing & releasing. The room was so quiet. 

Chris let go of the front of my neck & moved his hand to the back of it, once again taking a gentle but controlled hold. He began to add some downward pressure & I lowered my upper body back onto the table, once again resting the side of my face against the cool smooth surface, my head facing Chris’ direction. My frustrated muffled whimpers softening & quieting, but still mewing my disappointment. 

My right hand released its grip on Gordon’s thigh but remained resting there. He lifted it up & gently kissed the back of it. I gave his hand an equally gentle squeeze. Chris ran his fingers tenderly through the side of my hair, pushing it carefully back. His soft lips brushed against my ear, his warm breath caressing it.

“You are not allowed to orgasm today. You are not allowed to orgasm until I give you permission.” His order was whispered, but I knew that he meant for Gordon to also hear his words to me. 

“Do you understand me, Maddy?” Chris voice was as soft as silk & as sweet as honey. But the undeniable seriousness was woven in steel.

I nodded, even as that sensual ache pulsed, unsatisfied, deep in my still heated little rose bud.

He gave my ear a feathery kiss then pulled his face away. He let out a low sigh, then I felt his left palm press against my back, fingers spread, as if holding me still. The first smack on my ass cheeks came down hard, & popped in the quiet studio like a firecracker.

I let out a deep grunt, my upper body instinctively trying to rear up, but Chris added a little weight to his hand & rearing up was no longer an option. The second smack flew in a sharp upward motion from the bottom of my ass & bounced off the walls.

I grunted deep & loud again, the leather of his glove adding an unexpected bite to the spanking. Unexpected only to me, I was sure. The third smack, hard, again delivered in that same upward sweep causing my ass to bounce & shoving my body forward on the table.

“Fuck…” Gordon’s exclamation low & soft, as if he felt that one, too.

I bit down on the little red ball, my grunt elongating into a throaty groan. Chris took his hand off my back & slipped it roughly into my hair, wrapping a messy handful tightly around his fist, pulling. The fourth smack even harder than the first three, loudly popping against both cheeks at the same time. 

“Fuck…” This time it was Chris’ voice. Quiet, controlled. That hint of a quiver, though, letting me know he felt that one in his cock.

My teeth bit down on the ball again. My groan warped into something guttural & needy. My frenzied mind noticing his corporal punishment wasn’t diminishing the unquenched desire between my legs, but only fanning the flames. The fifth & sixth smacks merciless in their delivery against my heated skin. The deceptively butter-soft feel of his gloves sinking their leather fangs into my flesh with each stroke of his strong hand.

My voice becoming hoarse with my straining grunts & groans. My eyes wet with tears of emotional & passionate intensity. My mind & body burning brightly with new found lust & need. I wanted Chris to fuck me right there. I wanted them both to fuck me. Just as I was right now. Bent over this table. Blindfolded & gagged. My sweatpants & panties pulled down to my thighs. In the middle of his fucking studio. In the middle of this fucking morning.

The seventh smack landed like the crack of a whip & I let out a loud animalistic groaning wail that would’ve been a cry had the ball gag not done its job. Even in my brain’s current hazy state, I was still aware that Chris’ studio had neighbors. And the effectiveness of this little red ball told me that Chris was still aware of that, too. 

The spanking stopped. 

I was out of breath, panting through my nose. I felt the gag being unbuckled & the straps being carefully pulled from my sure to be tangled hair. The ball was slowly eased from my mouth & I could feel several strands of my saliva being pulled with it. My jaw muscles ached a little & Chris gently wiped my mouth with a soft tissue.

“I’m going to remove the blindfold in just a moment.” His voice as gentle as his caring gesture.

After tending to my mouth, he pulled up my panties & then my pants, making sure my clothing was aligned correctly & sitting properly again. A small smile played on my lips at his tender attentiveness. He rolled up a chair behind me & helped me to sit into it, my aching bottom causing me to tighten my lips & emit a little grunt. He then untied the blindfold, once again being cautious as he removed it, to not pull my hair in the process. The sweet irony played out on my tear stained face as I blinked several times, looking up at him. 

Gordon appeared, holding out a damp wash cloth to his friend. Chris smiled a “thank you” at his former bandmate & sat down in his chair, removing his gloves, taking the cloth from him. He held my chin in his left hand & began to gently wipe my tears away with his right.

“Yes, you can do this yourself in the bathroom. I know.” My employer’s preemptive statement bathed in gentle humor. His blue eyes glimmering jewel-like with a curious mix of tender affection & simmering desire.

I sat quietly as he doted on me, closing my eyes when he told me to, so that he could very gently wipe them. I couldn’t keep that small smile off my face. When I reopened them, Gordon stood next to me offering me a cold can of Coke. 

“I was going to get you some water but I think you need something stronger.” His smile wide & playful.

I gladly accepted the soda & immediately took a big sip, my throat was dry & I was thirsty. I looked up at him & returned the playful look. 

“Thank you.” My voice was noticeably a little croaky. 

The bassist gave me a little nod & then told Chris he had to get going but that he would see him tomorrow at the video game party. Chris gave his friend a thumbs-up. 

“I’m going to see you there too, aren’t I?” Gordon eyed me in a mock suspicious way as he put on his coat & adjusted his baseball cap.

I smiled at him & a burp slipped out of my mouth.

“Oops...sorry. Yes, I’ll be there.” I smirked embarrassingly & felt a blush warm my cheeks.

“THAT makes you blush?!” Gordon’s incredulous tone making Chris chuckle.

“Go, please. I think she’s had enough for today.” Chris’ trying-to-be-helpful tone wasn’t helping & only made his friend laugh & made me blush more.

Gordon shook his head & gave me a quick kiss on the forehead. His bright blue eyes held mine for a moment & I could see the warm affection in them.

“Be good.” He gave me a friendly wink.

“Ciao.” My voice sounded a little less dry.

He straightened back up & pointed an accusing finger at Chris but didn’t say anything.

“Ciao.” Chris purred out the farewell.

Gordon flashed his friend a knowing look which Chris immediately shot back, but their quick exchange was lost on me. The bassist glanced at me with the same look & then walked out of the studio. I was still lost, but since my mind was still in the process of settling down I didn’t have enough brain power to think too hard on the possible meaning.

After wiping my face, Chris offered to detangle my hair & I eagerly accepted, remembering how nice it was to have him brush my hair. I sat there, with my back to him, my eyes closed, & just enjoyed the extra attention while we talked easily about tomorrow’s get together. I did find it a little odd having this ordinary conversation about the party with the same man who just spanked me so roughly. But it was a pleasant kind of odd. A good kind of odd. 

When he was done, I visited the bathroom once more, reapplied the same lip gloss & noticed my face wasn’t any worse for wear after the spanking. That cool, damp washcloth & Chris’ sweet attention had removed all traces of tears. Before stepping out, I tried to get a look at my butt in the bathroom mirror but it was too high up. It was still sore & even still a little warm to the touch. But I didn’t mind.

I stepped back into the studio & Chris was on a phone call. As he spoke to the other person, he looked over at me & held up his index finger, signaling me to wait for him to finish his call. As I waited, I slipped on my coat & put the studio supply shopping list into my messenger bag. I carefully sat down on the couch. As Chris was ending the conversation, I looked over at the full length mirror in the corner. I glanced over at my Goth employer & then back at the mirror. I still wanted to see what my bottom looked like, but for some silly, unknown reason, I didn’t want to do it in front of him. I sighed. I would just wait until I got home.

Chris returned his phone to his hoodie pocket & I got back up, securing the strap of my bag over my shoulder. He walked me out to my car & I noticed there were only two other vehicles parked there aside from ours, & one was a city maintenance truck. Since it was Friday, & the weather was nice, the lack of people in this area didn’t surprise me too much. At least when Mario & Conrad got here they would be able to park close to the entrance.

Chris held my car door open as I tossed my bag onto the passenger seat. As I sat down, he left the door open & crouched down next to me. He gave the sleeve of my coat a playful tug.

“Are you ok?” His voice was soft as his still glimmering eyes searched my face.

“Yeah, I’m good.” I gave him a sweet smile, my words speaking the truth. 

He remained silent for a moment, his eyes narrowing just a bit as he thought over my simple statement. He reached up & stroked the side of my face. My smile grew wider. He leaned up & gave me a kiss, a gentle passion controlling his tongue. I kept my desire for him in check also, I still had things to do today & I was already horny enough as it was. I didn’t need to add fuel to my still smoldering fire.

He pulled back & licked his lips, his bedroom eyes on full display. 

“Do you know why I did that?” His voice still soft as he tipped his head in the direction of the studio.

I nodded.

“To discipline me for looking away when you told me not to.” The mild hoarseness in my voice still lingering.

His deep blue gaze pushed into me, marking its territory. He gave a single faint nod.

He stood back up & looked down at me. The look in his eyes showing he was fully aware of his provocative position before me, my face just a few inches from his hidden cock. He reached down & stroked the back of my head, adding an invisible exclamation point to the suggestive visual.

“You are not allowed to orgasm without my consent.” His quiet reminder floating down to me.

I kept my eyes up on his handsome face. I felt his words stroke my frustrated clit as much as I heard them with my ears. I squirmed a little in my seat. His eyes flicked to my hips & his jaw shifted a bit before his gaze returned to my face. 

He moved his hands into the pockets of his coat & stared at me. He took a step to the side & bent down, bringing his face close to mine. His expression serious yet sexy.

“Have a good day.” His sweetly sincere sentiment wrapped in a low tone. 

I leaned forward & kissed him, holding his face in my hands. My willpower weakened & I kissed him more passionately than I wanted to. He responded with equal desire, keeping his hands in his pockets. I slipped a soft, needy whimper into his mouth. Then another one. I wanted him to know exactly the state he was leaving me in. And with each whimper I gave to him, he returned a sultry moan back to me. The flames of my lust were fully reignited, & I needed more than kisses to douse the fire that burned within me. Maybe he would understand. Maybe he would relent. 

I pulled back & let go of his face. Both of our lips slightly bee stung. The sultry quality of his moans now also easily visible in his darkened eyes. He straightened up once more, his hands remaining in the warmth of his pockets, his eyes remaining on me.

“I wanna cum for you.” It was a simple & honest plea as I looked up at him.

He stood still like a tall statue, dressed in black, looking down at me. His face a silent seduction, staring, with dark eyes sparkling, like stars in a clear evening sky. A thousand years could have passed as he held my gaze & I wouldn’t have noticed. All I heard was the breeze rustling the dry leaves in the trees. 

He took a small step towards me & pulled his hands out of his pockets. He stroked my hair with both of his hands, then rested them on the back of my head, pulling my face against him, my chin touching his belly as I looked up at him. Had someone seen us they might have assumed they stumbled upon a public display of salacious affection. But since the street was fairly deserted, our only audience were the few remaining birds in the trees.

“I want you to.” His eyes held tight to me & his words were serious & reassuring.

A small smile formed on my lips as I rested my hands on the front of his thighs. Had we been anywhere but out in the open, my hands would be exploring him over his pants. And from the look that flashed across his eyes, he knew what I was thinking.

“And when I allow you to, it will be amazing for both of us.”

In all the world, had a denial ever been issued in such a seductive manner? I doubted it. 

He stroked the back of my head, running his fingers gently through my hair, as his beautiful unyielding eyes searched my face for my thoughts. My lone, quiet sigh said everything. I closed my eyes & brushed my forehead against his belly, giving his thighs a resigning, light squeeze, before pulling away.

I settled in my seat & looked back up at him. It was going to be a long day. A long sexually frustrating day & possibly night. And for some reason, I smiled at him. Far from a big happy grin, to be sure, but still… And it was genuine. Damn. 

A dark colored car was coming down the street & Chris gave it a single friendly wave & smile before turning back to me.

“Mario & Conrad are here. I have to go.” His tone & face were playfully pouty.

I drew my legs inside the car, faced forward in my seat & closed the car door. I turned the ignition & lowered my window. A scene I’d repeated with him countless times.

After parking their car in front of Chris’, Mario & Conrad walked over to us. Pleasant greetings were exchanged all around & Chris told them he’d be right in. As the two headed into the building, my boss turned his attention back to me. I buckled my seat belt. 

“Are you coming back here today?” He squinted as a bright shaft of morning sunlight poked through the trees & singled him out. He stepped to the side & another spike of the sun’s rays broke through the leaves & fell on him. He squinted again. 

I laughed softly at his battle with nature. 

“Yeah, just to drop off the supplies I’m picking up for the studio.” 

He gave a little nod.

“Ok.” 

He stepped up to my window & bent down, leaning his face in, he kissed the tip of my nose & straightened up again.

“See you later.” 

“My nose?” My question was playful.

He returned his hands to his pockets & stood with his legs spread, shortening himself.

“Do you want me to kiss your mouth?” His return question also playful.

I thought about it for a moment, about my current state of amour interruptus. Then I did the one thing his fan’s said could never be done.

“No.” 

A small knowing smile crept across his face.

A small knowing, unsatisfied smirk crept across mine.

He let out a quiet laugh. I gave him a little farewell wave & he returned it, watching me as I drove off. I left the window down. I needed that rush of cold air against my skin. 

By the time late afternoon arrived I was done with all the to-do’s, including the supply shopping, & returned to the studio to drop everything off. As I put away the items, Chris, Mario & Conrad looked over the new band merchandise samples that the label had sent along. Chris showed me all the new things that would soon be available, & it was exciting for me to get a sneak peek at all the wonderful new goodies & t-shirt designs. 

I ended up staying for another hour, enjoying the upbeat atmosphere & fun conversation about the new merchandise & the upcoming new tour. Chris also divulged a little hush hush information that he was currently in talks, albeit casually, with the label about a possible new Terminal Choice album & maybe even a tour. He explained that he was also, again casually, talking to Gordon, Jens & Louis about it to see how they felt & what their schedules for the next two years looked like. Chris said they were all enthusiastic about it, but it would depend on getting everyone available at the same time, that would be tricky. But for now, he was still focused on the upcoming new Blutengel album & tour.

It was starting to get dark & I said my good-byes to Mario & Conrad. Chris excused himself from the group & walk me to my car. It felt a little like deja vu from this morning. I unlocked the doors, but before I could open mine, he turned me around & kissed me, taking a hold of my hands & carefully pinning them to my lower back, pulling me against him. 

His kiss was deep but soft & I instantly melted into him. It was a long kiss. A slow kiss. A perfect kiss. The street lights began to flicker on, one after the other. He took a single step forward & I felt the car against my back. He let go of my hands & gently pressed himself against me. My hands slid up to his chest as his hands caressed my hips, pulling them to him. He moved his face back slowly, the light from the streetlamps dancing in his eyes. He kept me pinned between the car & himself & it felt good. He gave me a little smile.

“I’m bad, I know.” His voice whispery & soft.

I returned his smile.

“Yes, you are. Pure evil.” My voice also soft & meant just for him.

His smile grew wider & he nodded, raising one sleek eyebrow.

“Pure evil.” He echoed my words slowly as his eyes roamed my face.

He kissed me again, his sweet tongue moving with gentle passion. If I could only stop one moment in time, it would be now. Here with him, in the cool air of the darkening evening, beneath the glowing streetlamps. This kiss. 

He pulled his face back once more but still held me close.

“You should get going, before it gets too dark.” A touch of thickness to his voice.

“I know how to drive at night, you know.” I couldn’t help but tease him.

His smirk was wide.

“I know, I know. That’s just how I am, it’s me.” The sensual thickness in his tone adding a sexy quality to his self deprecating admission.

I smiled warmly & stretched up, kissing his unshaven chin.

“I’m going.”

His smirk curled into a cheeky smile. My eye roll was mild as I slipped out from between him & my car. Before I drove off, he gave me a sweet kiss on the forehead which made my heart flutter as much as his passionate kisses did.

Later that night, as I lay in bed, the day began replaying in my mind. As I remembered the feeling of being blindfolded & being touched by Chris, it was difficult to resist reenacting the scene with my own fingers. I knew that there would be no way he’d know if I touched myself or not. But I would know. And I didn’t want to disappoint him. 

But how long would he wait before giving me permission? Would he call me later tonight? I looked at my phone sitting up attentively in its little stand. 11:35 pm. I doubted it. Would he call me in the morning? He wasn’t really an early morning kind of guy. Probably not. Maybe a random call during the day tomorrow. He & Viki would be busy getting ready for everyone to come over that evening for his party. Didn’t really see that either. Then there was the party itself. Eight people all eating, drinking, talking, laughing, having a good time while playing video games all night. That wouldn’t work. That brings me to Sunday. Maybe Sunday. I don’t know. Maybe he didn’t mean for this just to go for a few hours or even days. What if he meant weeks? I squirmed restlessly & sighed. I tried to focus on the party tomorrow. 

I did have to admit I was really looking forward to it, everyone was. And since everyone had made special adjustments to their busy schedules to be there, I knew it was going to be a special night. I snuggled into the fluffy down comforter feeling better. As I drifted off thinking of what games I might be good at, my mind sent me only one image. Blue balls. Damn.


	19. Wet Berlin

As my eyes creaked open I became aware of a hissing sound coming from behind me. My sleepy gaze fell on my phone. It was 7:50 am. Why was it still so dark? I yawned as I rolled over in the direction of my bedroom window. It was pouring outside. And because I had left the window open a few inches last night, due to the nice weather we’d been having & because I was safely three flights up, the heavy rain was drenching Ulli’s moon flower plant & the floor.

I jumped up & shut the window, but not before an icy, damp breeze blew in, chilling me to my core. My teeth chattered as I picked up the drowning plant & scurried into the bathroom with it. I dumped out the pooling rainwater in the sink & set down the poor green thing in the basin. It’s little fragrant white buds were still tightly closed & sleeping, waiting for the next full moon. I gave it a quick once over & was happy to see that it was in good shape. I threw on my always stylish pink bathrobe, grabbed a towel, & scurried back over to the bedroom window.

I dropped the towel onto the puddle of cold water & did a little dance on it with my bare feet. Where the heck were my slippers? Isn’t this how people catch pneumonia? And die? I made a snarky face. As quickly as those thoughts shot into my head, they were just as quickly shot back out by a sudden loud clap of thunder & my jingling phone. I jumped.

“Shit…” My exclamation as snarky as my face.

I climbed back into bed & crawled to the other side, squinting at the glowing screen as I picked up my phone from its stand. Chris had sent out a group message. I looked at the current time. 8:03 am. Wow, he was up early for a Saturday. After reading a couple of lines I realized it was a resend of his original party e-vite.

(1) Doors Open: 17:00 (5 pm) - Early arrivals will be sent away.  
(2) End: Last Man Standing.  
(3) There will be a lot of food & drinks - Don’t bring anything!  
(4) Parking - You’re on your own.  
(5) Dress Code - Yes, please wear something.  
(6) Phones will be confiscated at the door to prevent incriminating pics from leaking.  
(7) PRIVATE PARTY NO UNINVITED GUESTS.  
(8) What happens in my house stays in my house.  
(9) Please read #8.  
(10) Please read #9.

I smiled at the cute instructions.

A low rumble of thunder drew my attention back to the bedroom window. The rain was coming down in sheets. You couldn’t even hear the raindrops anymore, just that low, steady hiss. Luckily there wasn’t anywhere I had to be this morning, but I still had some things I wanted to get done before tonight. As I got myself ready to tackle some mundane household chores, my phone began jingling again. It was a new group message from Chris.

Chris P … weather report says it will be like this all day & night

Chris P … should we postpone the party for a different day?

Ulli … I say no… I can drive in the rain I’m ok 

Mario … no dont change it… I have driven in worse weather

Gared … I also say no… Will be tough to reschedule ;)

Me … I agree no don’t change it

Gordon - Chris P … do you know its 8:30 in the MORNING??

Chris P - Gared … heh true

Chris H … are we partying outside? no we will be inside… who cares if it rains

Chris P - Gordon … haha I have to get a few things for tonight if we still do this

Chris P - Gordon … cancel or no

Ulli - Chris H … oh such a bad mood

Ulli - Chris H … some people do not like to drive in heavy rain especially at night

Gordon - Chris P … no

Me - Gordon … Yay :)

Gared - Ulli … he’s waiting for his coffee… he’s cranky :)

Chris H … yes Ulli I know what Pohl means… I’m just being a dick

Mario … hahaha

Gordon … as usual Harms

Gordon - Me … :) MM

Gordon - Me … sorry u have to hear the word dick so early in the morning… u too Ulli

Ulli - Gared … yes so cranky… i hope his coffee is ready soon

Chris P - Gordon … dick hahahahaha

Chris H … takes 1 to know 1 Mocznay

Ulli … omg Gordon haha

Me - Gordon … xD

Mario … they are starting again so I am going :) see everyone tonight yes?

Chris P … cancel or no Harms

Gared - Chris P … yes he will be there :)

Chris H - Gared … I can answer for myself thank u

Chris H … yes Pohl I will attend ur group sex party… i mean video game party

Ulli … coffee is still not ready I think

Chris P - Mario … I know u have to get going so yes see you tonight

Me - Ulli … haha

Gared - Ulli … haha :D

Mario … see everyone later then :) bye bye

Ulli … see u Mario… I’m going too… see you lovely people tonight :)

Gordon … u wish it were an orgy Harms

Chris P … Mario Ulli ciao

Me … see you later Ulli Mario :)

Gordon … Mario Ulli see you… stay dry today

Chris H … yes see you two later

Chris H … you bore me this morning Mocznay & my coffee is ready

Chris H … I’m going… I have work to do

Gared … bye Ulli Mario… see you tonight

Gared … I have to go too… work work work

Gared … see everyone later… looking forward to finally meeting u Maddy :)

Chris P … Gared Harms later

Gordon … see you Gared

Chris H … yes Maddy… looking forward to meeting u too

Me … looking forward to meeting you Gared Chris H :)

Gordon - Maddy … Harms means he is looking forward to checking u out

Chris P … have to go… Viki is ready to leave… finally ;) 

Chris H … so boring Mocznay… I’m out

Chris P … Maddy drive safe tonight… see u

Chris P … Gordon…

Me … I will… see u Chris :) 

Gordon … Chris…

Me … I should go also… wanna get some stuff done before tonight :)

Gordon - Me … wanna fuck?

Me … omg haha

Gordon … thought I’d try ;)

Me … can I take a rain check? :)

Gordon … haha of course :) … see u later MM

Me … see u GG :) ……….

My smile stayed in place as Gordon logged out. A long slow roll of thunder moved through the grey skies outside, the rain still falling. I let out a happy sigh & set my phone down. All that talk about coffee made me look forward to my first cup this gloomy morning, & some breakfast, before I wrestled with the laundry.

I hoped the day would go by quickly. I was looking forward to tonight.


	20. Private Party (Part 1 - Shelter From The Storm)

I glanced at the numbers glowing softly on the radio. 17:35 (5:35 pm). As I approached Chris’ home I noticed that there weren’t any cars in the driveway. I came to a stop in the dark street & saw that he & Viki had parked along the curb. As I pulled up behind Viki’s car I saw her walking quickly down the driveway, smiling & waving rapidly at me with one hand, while holding an umbrella in the other. She pointed to the ground next to her & motioned for me to pull in.

I moved my car into the driveway, parked, & got out, grabbing my trusty messenger bag & a colorful bouquet of fresh flowers. Viki’s smile was big & bright as she held the umbrella over me while I shut the door & set the locks.

The light rainfall bounced off her umbrella with soft taps as I handed her the fragrant bouquet. She let out a soft “ooh” as she gathered the cheery arrangement to her chest. She gave me a quick kiss on the cheek.

“Sehr schön! Danke! (Very beautiful! Thank you!)” Her voice as bright as her smile.

As we walked towards the house, she explained that Chris wanted Ulli & I to park in the driveway in case the rain was heavy when we left. As we entered their home she said that even though Chris was quite a modern man, he was still old fashioned in many ways when it came chivalry. I had to agree with her.

After shutting the door behind us, she folded up the black umbrella & deposited it into a slim umbrella stand by the door. She pointed to an array of fluffy, bright red house slippers that were lined up against one of the walls in the well lit entryway. A smile spread across my face at the cheerful looking footwear. As she took my coat & bag & hung them up, she told me that we could leave our wet shoes here & wear the slippers around the house if we wanted too.

The sizes were simply labeled men & women. I stepped into a pair & they were as soft & comfortable as they looked, with ample space at the front for wiggling toes. She smiled when I told her that they felt great & she informed me that we could take our slippers home as a type of party favor. My smile was happy & big as I thanked her.

She motioned for me to follow her, & as we walked I could smell something good. Their home had a cozy warmth to it that wasn’t hot or stuffy, & as she guided me into the bright kitchen a wonderfully delicate cinnamon scent teased my cold nose. She set the flowers down & showed me a golden colored cake that was cooling on one of the counters. A cinnamon cake that she had baked from scratch. It was round & pleasingly chubby, with swirling streaks of amber colored cinnamon sugar. Viki went on to explain that there was also a warm, butter rum sauce that she had made to accompany the cake. 

“Maybe more rum than butter tonight.” She winked playfully at me, her blue eyes sparkling with mischief. 

I chuckled quietly, my slightly evil tone not lost on my giggling hostess. She nodded at me as if we’d just made a deal with the devil. It was going to be a fun night.

A large, warm hand suddenly came around from behind me & gently covered up my eyes. 

“Are you telling her about the rules for tonight? How all the girls have to be naked while playing the games? And how if a girl loses a game she has to do anything the guys say? No matter how sexually fucked up or disgusting?”

Gordon. I laughed. 

“No. I did not tell her.” Viki’s tone was full of regret & humor.

“What’s sexually fucked up & disgusting?” Chris’ upbeat voice suddenly chimed in with curiosity.

Gordon removed his hand from my eyes & I squinted a bit as my vision adjusted to the light again. 

“What the girls have to do if they lose. You remember. We talked about it earlier today.”

I turned my head & looked up at the bassist. His faux stern expression matching his faux stern tone. He glanced down at me & gave me a quick, faux stern nod. My attention was drawn the other way when I heard a sharp crunch. Chris was chewing on a baby carrot.

“Ja, ja (Yes, yes)... The talk we had. About the girls.” The singer swallowed & popped the remaining piece of carrot into his mouth, crunching loudly. He nodded affirmatively, his slim eyebrows arched in a serious fashion, his expression as stern as his friend’s. And as faux.

Viki let out an exasperated sigh & rolled her eyes, shaking her head. There was a knock at the front door & Chris excused himself, giving me a playful smile. Gordon reached over & picked up a baby pickle from the same fresh vegetable tray that held the baby carrots. Before taking a bite he held it out to me, his face still teasingly serious.

“Wanna taste my pickle?”

Viki let out a loud laugh as she finished arranging the bouquet in a pretty, clear glass vase. My laugh came out mixed with a snort & my eyes narrowed as I smirked up at the very bad man.

“Is this how it’s going to be all night?” My mildly sarcastic question delivered with good humor.

Gordon’s mischievous blue eyes filled with wicked playfulness as he stared at me.

“Yes.” He grinned, placing the entire baby pickle in his mouth, muffled crunches filling the kitchen.

I could hear Chris speaking to someone in German & then Mario popped his head into the kitchen.

“Hallo…” The producers tone & smile were upbeat & chipper.

The three of us greeted him with a round of “hello’s” as he handed Viki a bottle of white wine. She kissed his cheek & returned to him a cold bottle of beer that she removed from a blue ice chest that was placed across a couple of pushed together kitchen chairs. Chris’ arm suddenly appeared, stretched out, palm up, long fingers wiggling. Viki pulled another beer from the ice filled chest & placed it in his waiting palm. Chris flashed her a cheeky smile. Before another word could be said, or another face made, she pulled a third bottle from the chest & held it out to Gordon. He let out a soft laugh.

“Danke (Thank you).” His voice sincerely sweet.

Chris spoke in German again & suggested everyone get comfortable out in the living room because there was something he needed to tell us about tonight’s little get together. As Viki & I followed the guys out of the kitchen, she tapped me on the shoulder. 

“Maybe they will really make the girls do dirty sex things if we lose?” Her whispered question was teasing but held a trace of real, although humorous, concern.

I had to giggle at the question, but then paused for a moment, which only made me giggle harder at my own second thoughts. Viki started to laugh harder also, but quietly.

“Mario will be worse than Chris or Gordon. He will be, like, the king pervert.” Viki’s whispered words to me were bathed in uncontrolled hushed laughter.

As I pictured sweet, baby faced Mario transforming into a hand wringing, drooling, sex fiend I had to bite my tongue to keep from laughing out loud. I managed to pull myself together as Viki & I sat down on the couch next to the soft spoken, mild mannered producer.

Gordon was on his knees in front of the tv, sitting back on his heels, fiddling with one of the video gaming systems. I noticed there were two additional game consoles sitting to his left & an array of wireless controllers to his right. There was also a large stack of games on a small table next to the televison. I smiled. Apparently we were in for a competitive night. 

Chris was seated in a chair & was removing what looked like a letter, from a business size envelope. He took a sip of his beer then set the bottle down on the floor next to him. He explained to us that the power company had issued these notices informing residents that they would be doing emergency repair work in a couple of the underground cable tunnels. Chris glanced at the letter then continued saying that the repair work was to be done at night over the weekend, this weekend, so that power would be restored to normal by Monday morning.

Chris refolded the letter & slipped it back into the white envelope. He leaned forward, placing the notice on the coffee table, then settled back comfortably in his chair, resting his right ankle on his left knee. He picked up his beer & took another sip, this time keeping the glass bottle in his hand. He told us that he found the notice when he & Viki returned from their errands earlier today. Mario asked what the power company meant by “restored to normal by Monday”. 

The all black clad singer gave his friend, & business partner, a wide toothy smile. His deep blue eyes shining with a good mood.

“Well, that means good news for us when we go to the studio on Monday. Aberrr (Buuut)… The power is going to come & go tonight.”

A loud, deep rumble of thunder punctuated Chris’ answer to Mario. Viki rubbed her arms as if she were cold & I also felt that phantom chill as the thunder crept heavily & slowly through the rainy night.

Suddenly, the dormant television sprang to life with loud sirens & shrieks as a saved game began to play. Viki, Mario & myself all jumped in our seats & let out a collective “aah!”. Gordon & Chris began to laugh at our surprised jittery state.

“Sorry, sorry.” Gordon’s apology spoken through snickering laughter.

“Ach (Oh), Gordon!” Viki’s voice a mix of exasperation & relief as she threw one of the new, pretty, jewel toned couch pillows at him.

Chris’ lingering chuckles then drew her attention his way & she threw a pillow at him also.

“Du auch (You also)!”

Chris scrunched up his face at the impending impact & turned his shoulder, successfully deflecting the puffy projectile as it bounced lightly off his upper arm. There was a knock on the front door.

Viki stood up with a little huff & blew out a long sigh through puffed cheeks as she went to answer the visitors. Mario joined the other two musicians in their muffled laughter. The three of them looked at me & I just shook my head. Mario gave me a side hug & a little squeeze.

“It scared me, too.” His tone was soft & comforting but also laced with gentle humor.

Viki came back with a smiling Ulli, fluffy red slippers adorning the singer’s feet. A cacophony of greetings filled the cozy living room. As Ulli took a seat in one of comfortable looking chairs she told us that the power was out just a couple of streets from here & that the only light illuminating the stormy night in that area were the flashing traffic signals. 

As Chris got his musical partner caught up on the situation with the notification letter, Viki returned with a couple of glasses of the white wine that Mario had brought. She handed one to Ulli & one to me before heading back to the kitchen. Gordon took a sip of his beer & assured Ulli that if the power did go out we wouldn’t be left sitting in the dark. He told her that he had brought along a few battery powered lanterns, aside from the two flashlights Chris had, & that there were also plenty of candles. 

Viki came back into the room with her own glass of wine & a tray holding an assortment of crackers, sliced fruits & cheeses. She set the delectable looking offerings down on the coffee table next to a stack of napkins, small decorative paper plates & a cute, green ceramic container holding several elegant, silver cocktail forks.

As everyone helped themselves to the yummy looking little nibbles, the rain could be heard coming down hard & steady. As we chatted, waiting for Chris Harms & Gared to show up, Gordon, with now Mario helping him, was trying to get all of the wireless controllers to work properly at the same time. From the sounds of Gordon’s quiet curses, this was proving to be a bit of a challenge. 

With a sharp flash of lightning & loud clap of thunder, we were all plunged into darkness. 

“Ach, ja (Oh, yes) now us, too.” Ulli’s lament was sweetly chipper.

“Ughhhhh…” Gordon’s groan much less chipper.

With the few streetlights also out, the living room was truly blacked out. Until everyone started picking up their cell phones. There was another knock at the front door.

“I’m going, don’t move.” Viki’s voice giving us a heads up.

Chris asked Gordon where he had put the lanterns & his friend told him they were on the dining room table. As my Goth employer headed off into the dark house to retrieve the lights, Viki returned with two shadowy figures, a low groan of thunder announcing their ominous arrival.

“So good of you, Pohl, to invite us to your haunted house.”

“Harms.” Gordon’s low voice & flat tone made all of us chuckle in the dark.

“I like haunted houses! So fun & spooky!” 

Gared’s cheerful lilt elicited an affectionate “awww” from Viki & Ulli.

“Mocznay. You sound so low to the ground. On your knees already, I take it.” The Lord Of The Lost frontman’s tone as flat as Gordon’s.

“Oh, good. Now the party can start.” Ulli's gentle sarcasm delivered with angelic sweetness.

Chuckles & humorous snorts filled the murky darkness of the living room.

“Why don’t you come closer so I can take care of you, Harms. That way you can stop calling me & begging for it.” Gordon’s tone a mix of calm & disinterest.

Laughter & low “ooh’s” erupted. 

Chris’ familiar gentle chuckle wafted back into the room as he lit two small, metal lanterns he placed on the coffee table. Their combined golden glow was soft but still strong enough so that everyone could now see each other. 

Chris H & Gared were dressed in all black the same way Gordon & Chris were. Chris H had his blonde hair knotted up in his usual man bun & he wore his black frame, rectangle shaped glasses. Gared had his dark hair pulled back in a pony tail & a small, glitter pink barrette clipped just above his forehead to tame any wispy bangs. They both had on the fluffy, red house slippers. 

Viki pointed out their bright footwear to everyone, with a playful squeal of delight. A group “awww” was directed at the musical duo which caused Gared to beam with a wide smile & Chris H to smirk & roll his eyes. Viki told the pair to make themselves comfortable & to help themselves to the snacks on the coffee table while she went & got them a couple of beers. 

Chris moved two more of the comfy chairs from against the wall & sat them next to each other, across from himself & Ulli. He offered the The Lost guys a seat with affectionate pats on the back. Chris H’s expression softened & you could easily see the good friendship that he & Chris had shared for many years.

“There’s only one person in this room I don’t recognize, so that person must be Maddy.” Gared’s cheerful voice making me smile as he made a beeline towards me.

“Hi, Gared, nice to finally meet you.” I extended my hand as he stepped up to me.

The multi talented musician frowned & pushed my hand away, enveloping me in a bear hug. I couldn’t help but grin as I hugged him back. 

“I heard so many nice things about you, I feel like I know you. A handshake won’t do.” Gared’s warm tone made my heart feel good as he gave me a big friendly squeeze.

“Alright, alright, down boy, down. Sit.” Chris H’s voice hovering behind Gared,

The raven haired Goth pulled back, his smile to me as bright as his eyes.

“We’ll have coffee sometime. Just the two of us.” His whispered words delivered with eager anticipation of a future caffeine rendezvous.

“I’d love that.” My happy tone also reflected on my face at my new found friend.

As soon as Gared released me from his hold, Chris H assumed his place. His expression dressed in friendly curiosity & playful lechery.

“Yes, Maddy, I agree. A handshake just won’t due.” The blonde singer’s purred words mirroring his facial expression.

He wrapped his arms around me, pulling me close against him.

“Nice to finally meet you, Maddy Madeline.” 

“Nice to meet you, too.” I hugged him back, my tone warm & a touch surprised at his use of Gordon’s nickname for me.

“Uhhh…” Chris P’s softly playful concern causing Chris H to pull back from me & glance at his friend. 

The Blutengel creator knotted his sleek brows, narrowing his twinkling eyes, & gently shook his head, giving a faint nod towards Gordon. The blond singer & I both looked over at Gordon, who was still seated on the floor with Mario. 

The bassist’s expression was in full Grumpy Cat mode as he stared at Chris H.

“Maddy, to you. Only I can call her Maddy Madeline.” Gordon’s warning tone still holding a thin edge of dark humor.

The man bun wearing crooner turned back to face me.

“Is this true?” Chris H’s face a mask of dramatic concern.

I gave him a conciliatory smile & nod.

“Yes, it’s true. Only Gordon.” My voice rounding out the teasing, conciliatory trifecta. 

The Lost leader stepped back from me, removed his glasses & squinted through the lenses as if inspecting them for smudges.

“Just as well. Maddy Madeline was a little too cute for me, anyway. I much prefer just Maddy.”

He put his black framed glasses back on, gave me a cheerful smile, then smirked at Gordon. The kneeling bassist returned Chris H’s dismissive smirk with a wide, superior smile.

Chris P & Ulli started chuckling.

“I think it’s going to be a long night.” Ulli’s upbeat tone giving voice to the snorting laughter from everyone.

Viki returned with a couple of cold beers for The Lost guys as thunder bellowed in the stormy night. As Chris H & Gared made themselves comfortable in their chairs, the power suddenly came back on, bathing the living room in a bright, warm light. A collective “Yay!” flooded the room.

The next little while was spent in relaxed & cheery conversation as everyone enjoyed the hors d’oeuvres & got each other caught up on what’s been going on in their busy lives. The atmosphere was fun & playful, with the laughter & good vibes flowing as easily as the beer & wine.

Gordon stood up & gave a single, loud, clap of his hands & stated that the gaming system & all the controllers were set up & ready to go. A unanimous decision was made that we should start off with something fairly easy to play so that everyone could get warmed up. Our now loosened up & boisterous group agreed on a kart style racing game.

As everyone chatted & selected their controllers, Viki announced that all the food & drinks for tonight would simply be set up buffet style & everyone was to just help themselves. She added that all warm items, including a “coffee station” were set up on the dining room table, & all cold items & drinks would be left in the kitchen. 

“I think you’re all going to have an unfair advantage over me. I don’t play much.” Harm’s sighing lament elicited a couple of good natured “don’t worry” from his friends.

Chris & I, however, exchanged sly knowing glances, as I remembered what he had told me about the blonde singer feigning gaming inexperience. Gordon & Mario remained seated on the floor & the rest of us stayed where we were, with a few of the chairs being angled more towards the television. The race hadn’t been running for more than 15 seconds before there were already two crashed karts that had exploded into spectacular flames. Chris & Ulli. Viki burst out laughing while pointing at the screen & Gordon & Mario groaned in unison, shaking their heads. Ulli scowled at Chris.

“Look what you did!” The red haired songstress’ accusation flying at her musical partner like verbal daggers as she stared at him in disbelief. 

“What I did?!” The surprise in Chris’ voice also written all over his handsome face.

“YOU came into MY lane!” Chris waved his controller rapidly at the television while mirroring back to Ulli the same expression of disbelief. 

“Puhhh…came into your lane.” The Blutengel band mate narrowed her eyes as her quiet, mocking tone casually dismissed Chris. She turned her attention back to her shiney, newly restored kart.

The fun race continued with everyone taking turns in groups of four, & those that sat out happily enjoyed all the wonderful food & treats that Chris & Viki had provided. In between the animated vehicular carnage on screen & everyone voicing their driving critiques, including obscenity laden complaints of each other’s racing skills, no one seemed to notice that the electricity had held on nicely.

Until it didn’t.

A collective groan filled the lively room as we were once again plunged into darkness. Without all the noisy bells, whistles & chimes from the game filling the air, you could now easily hear how hard it was raining. Chris re-lit the battery powered lanterns on the coffee table as everyone took a break & checked their phones, or grabbed one of the flashlights & journeyed off to the bathroom. 

“The power has been off for over two hours just a few streets from here. That’s what the news is saying.” The glow from Mario’s phone illuminating his face as he spoke, keeping his eyes on the screen. 

“Maybe the outage has now extended to here. Maybe the electricity won’t come back on tonight.” Chris Harms’ voice preceded him as he returned from the bathroom, offering the flashlight to Ulli.

As the red head took the flashlight & rose to her feet, she gave The Lost frontman a suspicious look.

“You washed your hands before you touched this again, yes?” Her tone cautious but noticeably playful.

Chris, Gordon, Mario & Gared all snorted in unison. Viki made an “eww” face at me & I laughed. Harms stood by his chair & lazily stretched his arms & back.

“No. Now you have my penis DNA all over your fingers.” The blonde singer’s tone as bored as his expression. He picked up his beer from the floor next to his chair & took a long sip, keeping his eyes on Ulli. 

“Enjoy!” Harms flashed her a dazzling, toothpaste commercial smile as he sat down. 

The dimly lit room broke into laughter, but only from the men. Viki & I smirked at each other & looked over at Ulli. She looked at the two of us with a low key exasperated look.

“Yes. I will try not to have an orgasm.” The songstress’ voice as bored as The Lost’s leader. 

Viki & I burst out laughing as Ulli headed off to the bathroom. The guys joined us in our abundant amusement & even Harms couldn’t stifle his chuckles. 

Once Ulli returned, the power still hadn’t come back so we decided to try our hand at Trivial Pursuit, which Chris just happened to have at the ready. After everyone refreshed their drinks, Viki lit several candles around the living room. The lanterns & flashlights were turned off to save the batteries for trips to the bathroom, kitchen or to step outside for some quick fresh air. 

I was surprised at how involved everyone got in the game, including myself. I assumed that a simple question & answer card game would be a weak substitute for a more exciting video game. I was wrong. We enjoyed testing each other’s knowledge on a variety of subjects. It was fun & also extremely interesting to find out the categories that each of us were strong, & not so strong in. And to be perfectly honest, playing by candle light made it that much more enjoyable. It added a wonderful closeness & cozy element to our storm sheltered gathering. 

A break in the game occurred when Harms & Mario got into a friendly argument about the answer to a particular question. Harms believed the answer was actually incorrect & Mario insisted it wasn’t. When they whipped out their phones in a Google dual, that’s when the rest of us took a breather. Some of us visited the beloved bathroom, others checked out the assortment of yummy goodies still warming in chafing dishes in the dining room. 

Viki grabbed my hand & told me she wanted to show me something. The sparkle in her eyes gave me a clue that whatever it was, it made her quite happy. Since the flashlights had been taken, she took one of Gordon’s battery powered lanterns & led me down the dark hallway. She opened a door & guided me into her bedroom, closing the door behind us.

She set down the lantern on top of a large dresser & waved her arm in front of her. I looked around the dimly lit room & didn’t see anything unusual. But then I noticed it. The bed, bedding & furniture were all new. She had mentioned a few months ago that she wanted to redecorate their bedroom & had brought me over here to get my input on some ideas. At that time, I remembered thinking about that furniture catalog I had seen on Chris' desk in his studio back when I first met him. I smiled again now, as the past met up with the present in a lovely simple circle. 

I told her the newly decorated bedroom looked great & she insisted I see it again under better conditions when the power came back on, or on another day in daylight. I happily agreed. But even in the low light of the lantern, I could see that the bedding & other items she had selected were beautiful. 

I ran my hand back & forth across the bed cover & it was extremely soft. She ran her hand along the cover next to mine & let out a quiet laugh explaining that it looked like we were petting the bed. I chuckled & had to agree. Her hand glided lightly over mine & she gave me a sweet smile. I continued to slowly “pet” the bed & watch her face. 

Her glimmering eyes lowered & I followed her gaze. Her hand slipped delicately across the back of mine again before continuing along the soft cover. The slick, red polish on her manicured nails glinted in the dim light. Her hand moved across the back of mine again, but this time she kept it there & began to gently caress it. I watched for a moment then lifted my eyes to hers. The expression on her face was as gentle & sweet as her touch.

“I know someone who likes to be petted like this. Like we pet the bed.” Viki’s accented voice was soft like the light from the lantern.

I watched her face & enjoyed the delicate caress of her hand on mine. I wasn’t nervous. I wasn’t uncomfortable. I didn’t wonder why. And I didn’t have to wonder about who she was referring to.

She took a small step towards me & pressed her lips gently against mine. My eyes fluttered closed as she gave me a tender, feathery kiss. It was sweet. She pulled back & her faint smile held both innocent curiosity & sinful promise. I knew my eyes were big as I searched her face, not able to hide my own curiosity. 

She pressed her soft lips against mine again & my eyes fluttered closed once more. Her second kiss was more insistent but still tender & I felt her hands give my hips a gentle caress the same way Chris had done. The familiarity in her touch reignited that small flame deep within me. A small flame that I knew would quickly grow but that was now under Chris’ control, to fan or douse as he saw fit. When he saw fit. And as of now, his answer was still “no”.

Since I felt I was still safely away from the edge, I gently responded to her kiss. Thunder rolled deeply but quietly overhead as we stood there, kissing slowly in her low lit bedroom full of beautiful new things. She pulled away from me & climbed into the large, king size bed. She held her hand out to me, the same intriguing mix of innocence & sin in her warm smile. I paused, but only for a moment, my mind pleasantly tranquil, before I climbed into the big bed next to her. 

As soon as I settled in, her arm wrapped around my waist & she pulled me to her. Her warm mouth found mine again & her soft kiss was deep this time, her tongue slowly dancing with mine. My arms wrapped around her as I fully melted into her embrace, my mind noting the curious differences & similarities between her kisses & Chris’.

She pulled her face back once more & I could easily see the flame in her eyes. The contrast between the devil in her gaze and the angel in her smile made the sweet ache between my legs grow. Between tender & passionate kisses we undressed each other unhurriedly but still with a driven purpose. Once we were were both naked we fell onto our sides, lost once more in deep kisses & whispered sighs. Our hands explored each other slowly & gently, our fingers curious to learn the feminine landscape of each other’s unique bodies. 

As our searching hands found their way between each other’s heated thighs, my mind was a dark sea of odd tranquility & unquenched lust. Was Chris’ permission to orgasm required with Viki? Again, he would never know, would he. But he was also out in the living room, just feet away from here. Did he notice we were gone? Did he notice we had left together? Did he wonder why we weren’t back yet? I couldn’t explain why, but having these thoughts & questions about Chris, while being intimate with his girlfriend, were turning me on even more. I doubted I could save myself this time. The edge of that cliff was in view again. And I wanted to fall off it so fucking bad. 

I let out a gasp as Viki’s fingers worked my excited little clit, the dark sea in my head threatening to pull me under. I returned the same special attention to her little love button & heard her moan with deep pleasure. We pulled our faces back & looked into each other’s eyes, both of our brows furrowed with sexual tension, our breathing quick & shallow.

“You’re gonna make me cum…” Viki’s words riding on a needy, hushed whine.

Her pleading admission only caused my fingers to intensify their clitoral love making. I wanted her to cum. I wanted her to cum for me. I wanted her to cum for me because I was getting ready to cum for her.

She turned her head into the pillow & cried out loudly, the dense material muffling her voice. She moved her hand from between my legs & gripped my thigh tightly, her nails digging into my flesh. Her hips rocked back & forth as I continued rubbing her through her orgasm. I could feel the muscles in her thighs spasm as she looked down between us, her whimpers long & drawn out. She tossed her hair back & arched her back. Her pale breasts were swollen with desire & her pink nipples hard as stone. She looked beautiful. 

As I slowed my fingers, her hips rode out the last waves of her release. Her head came back up & she looked down at my hand between her legs, watching herself gently rock on my now gently stroking fingers. She ran her fingers through her long hair & gave me a big smile. She leaned in & kissed me sweetly, letting out an almost shy giggle. 

“Oh, that felt so good!” Her voice a touch raspy & thick. 

She gave me another quick, sweet kiss & I returned her big smile.

“I’m glad you liked it.” I couldn’t help but chuckle at her enthusiasm. 

“Now your turn!” Her eyes flashed with glee.

I laughed a little louder but my mirth melted into soft moans as she leaned against me, pushing me onto my back, her eager fingers quickly finding my delicate folds. She lay against my side, looking down at me, watching my eyes as she carefully stroked my wet petals. My eyelids heavy with lust, showing her exactly what I thought of her loving touch. 

She kissed me slowly as her fingers manipulated my unsatisfied clit. I couldn’t help but moan into her mouth as the fire within me began to quickly burn brightly again. I drew my leg high up against her waist & rocked my hips rhythmically, unashamedly, against her hand. Her finger strokes & hand movement matched my rhythm, & as we kissed tenderly, I felt that we were, in a sweet way, making love, & my heart was happy. 

I kept the pace steady as long as I could until that familiar urgency began calling me. As I sped up, so did she. She watched my face like a hawk, her eyes roaming from my eyes to my mouth, as she began to rapidly stroke me. Soft, desperate whimpers began to escape my lips, with similar soft whimpers slipping from hers as her excitement built from my arousal. Both of us trying so hard to be quiet. All gentleness gone from her stimulating touch as she roughly brought me to the precipice of my orgasm. My mouth opened in a soft, silent “oh” as my back began to arch. I pulled her tightly to me, wrapping my leg around her hips. 

Chris silently appeared next to the bed, looking down at us. His face was relaxed, but a dark intensity prowled in his blue eyes. He wrapped a handful of Viki’s long hair around his fist & gently, but firmly, slowly pulled her head back while his gaze burned into me.


	21. Private Party (Part 2 - The Big Bad Wolf)

I was left balancing precariously on the edge of that high cliff as Chris silently shifted his intense gaze from me to Viki. She looked up at him, her mouth slightly parted, a soft mew escaping her lips. He lowered his face slowly & kissed her lips very softly, his fist holding her hair tightly. Her fingers had stopped moving & my breathing was shallow as my body was caught in limbo, neither fully here nor there, hanging on by a thread. And when Chris casually pulled his face back from Viki & quietly moved his dark eyes back to me, his calm, seductive expression told me that he knew my teetering position on that cliff all too well.

“Please…” My voice nothing more than trembling breath. My eyes on his face as pleading as my request.

Viki’s glimmering eyes traveled from Chris’ face to mine, & the comforting look in them told me that she already knew what his response was going to be. She gently pulled her hand from between my legs & rested it on my thigh, giving it a single comforting caress. 

My pleading look fell on her hand, then lifted back up to Chris. He gave me a single, slow, shake of his head. His predatory gaze stayed on me as he released Viki’s hair from his fist, unraveling the long, blonde tendrils carefully. He gave the back of her head a gentle caress, not moving his eyes from me.

I couldn’t look away from those two hypnotic blue flames. I finally understood the phrase, “to get lost in someone’s eyes.” I was lost in the deep, lush forest of his dark fairy tale. Never leaving a trail of breadcrumbs for myself. Never finding my way to Grandmother's house. The big, bad wolf standing before me. Dressed in black from head to toe. Watching. What sharp teeth you have. All the better to eat you with, my dear. 

His dark, seductive gaze not leaving my face, the large black wolf slowly leaned down towards me, but stopped half way, placing his left hand on the bed. Those two flickering blue flames left my eyes for only a moment, to singe my lips with their carnal heat, before returning their hold on my gaze. In that moment, I knew what he wanted from me. An oh so small show of submission to him. An otherwise unremarkable gesture, but one that he & I both knew would discreetly bind me to him in a way that few would understand.

The wolf waited. Watching. 

I moved slowly towards him, holding part of the bed cover over my naked breasts as I stretched my upper half up to meet him. His right hand came up, pulling the bed cover back down with a quick, gentle tug. His eyes dropping for a moment, fondling my lust swollen flesh roughly without laying a finger on me. His lips pursed slightly. Had he smiled, I was sure I would’ve seen a mouth full of large, razor sharp teeth. My hand fluttered over my bare chest. As I leaned up towards him again, his deep blue eyes lifted to my face once more. Since he was so tall, & because he had only lowered his body part way, I had to raise up almost fully on my knees, resting my hands on his upper arms to steady myself. I gave him a small, tender kiss on his silky lips, then sat back down on my knees. 

Such an unremarkable gesture. Such a tiny blip in time. The smallest smile curled up one side of his mouth. A wolf’s smile. A gentleman wolf. Without pen or paper, or a single spoken word, but for the smallest of kisses, my pleasure, my release, was now owned by him. I would have to ask for it from now on. Hope for it. Be good for it. Obey for it. Beg for it. And as I watched him straighten back up, carefully pulling down the bottom of his soft, black sweater, smoothing it out with his long elegant fingers, then running his right hand through his dark hair as his numerous silver bracelets clinked softly, I was happy, truly happy, & I wouldn’t have it any other way. 

“You two should get back to the party. You’re missing all the fun.” Chris’ voice was low & soft as his eyes moved slowly from me to Viki, then back to me again. 

We unintentionally nodded in unison up at him, both of us still uncovered, naked before him. The titillating nature of the visual far from lost on the big, bad wolf as his sleek left eyebrow twitched upward. Once. He blinked slowly, then turned & quietly left the bedroom, shutting the door gently behind him. 

Viki & I said little to each other as we got dressed & straightened ourselves back up. But the almost-silence between us wasn’t uncomfortable. Instead, our occasional, almost shy glances at each other were filled with words of understanding that didn’t need to be said out loud. We both fully understood the very unique relationship the three of us were now in, as if that small kiss I gave to Chris was my official acceptance into his very private fold. And I suppose it was. How all of this would play out down the road, I didn’t know. I really didn’t know. But right now there was a party going on out in the living room that I did want to get back to. Viki walked past me holding the lantern & held the bedroom door open, her sweet smile told me she was eager to get back to the party, too. 

The power had come back on, & the two of us entered the warmly lit living room just as Chris H was bashing Gordon on the head with the butt of his sword, on screen, that is. Apparently, they were now playing some type of medieval tournament video game. Gordon was cursing a blue streak as he couldn’t get his character to block the blows. Mario shouting at Gordon in a humorous way in German, to turn his animated knight in the other direction, also didn’t seem to be helping the Miss Construction frontman. 

Viki said she was going into the kitchen to get a cold drink & asked if I wanted one, too. That sounded good & I eagerly accepted. I sat down on the couch & when she returned I quickly drank half of the can of cola, not realizing how thirsty I was. Her phone began ringing & after she looked at the screen, she excused herself to take the call. When she stepped away, I settled back into the comfortable couch, sipping the cold soda & lazily watching everyone. 

As Harms & Gordon battled each other in the knights arena, Mario acted as their instructor & referee. Both of the bawdy musicians spent most of their time cursing at each other rather than listening to the good-natured producer. Gared & Ulli had moved their chairs together & were looking at each other’s vacation photos on their phones, complimentary “oohs” & “aahs” coming from both of them. Viki paced slowly back & forth in the entrance to the living room, sipping her soda, & laughing with the person on the other end of her call. I sighed contentedly, my mind noticeably full & wonderfully empty at the same time. As I took another sip of the bubbly cola, I caught Chris’ eye.

He sat slightly slumped in a relaxed fashion in his chair, his right leg crossed at the knee over his left. He kept his eyes on me as he took a sip of a fresh beer. The intensity from his face had subsided, but the wolf’s gleam could still be seen in his beautiful eyes. He stared at me in that unique way he had since we first met. As if he were looking into me, not through me. And it still made me shiver with a delicate arousal & a whisper of apprehension, the way it always had. 

He lifted the beer bottle & took another sip, this one slow, his eyes narrowing slightly, staying on me. Chris could do more to me with a single silent look than my ex fiance could ever do with his words. And as I sat there quietly enjoying my soda, looking for all the world as relaxed as everyone else, I ached for him. Deeply. Not just with my body, but with my heart. As I stared back at him, I wanted him to see that all-over-ache in my eyes. I wanted him to see not only the desire I had for him, but also the need I had for him. A need that scared me sometimes. 

I lowered my eyes & looked at the bright red cola can in my hands. I had almost finished off its entire content & my mouth was still dry. As a long groan of muted thunder moved through the night sky, I felt something small & lightweight bounce off the top of my head. I looked up & saw Gordon smiling at me, showing me a single M&M candy between his thumb & index finger. I glanced down at my feet & spied its identical counterpart laying next to my foot. I looked back at the grinning musician with a smile. He waved a spare game controller at me, raising & lowering his brow quickly. I picked up the sugary projectile, placed it on the coffee table & went over to him. I sat down on my knees on the floor next to him & he handed me the spare controller.

“Ready to lose?” Gordon’s teasing bravado made me laugh.

“Lose, hardly.” My haughty tone made him chuckle as he reset the knights tournament. 

“Ok… Make your warrior.” The very bad man dropped a handful of M&M’s into his mouth as his eyes twinkled at me. 

As I began to build my player, I noticed that this game had very detailed options when it came to character creation. Not only could I select gender & general physical appearance, but also age, weight/size/height, shades of hair color, length, style. And for female characters, breast & butt size. That option made me laugh. 

After everyone in the room added their two cents as to how my knight should look, I ended up with a 7 foot tall amazon covered in tribal tattoos, with knee length red & black hair, boobs as big as her head, a butt with lots of junk in the trunk, wearing 6 inch stilettos thigh boots & what was little more than an armored string bikini.

The men in the room, including baby faced Mario, seemed very pleased with the final outcome & didn’t see any problem with her doing battle in metal dental floss. Ulli, Viki & myself were left scratching our heads & wondering what happened to our input, a sensible looking character with full body armor. The one thing the three of us did find interesting was that all of the guys, once again including mild mannered Mario, were eager to take a turn playing as the well endowed glamazon warrior. We looked at each other & smirked.

As 1 am rolled around, The Lost guys were the first ones to have to leave the get together, stating they had to return to Hamburg in the morning so that they could prepare for a long day in the studio on Monday. Chris H gave Gordon a friendly handshake & Gared reminded me of our future coffee “date”, I told him I looked forward to it. Chris & Viki walked them out & Ulli & I took the empty bottles & cans into the kitchen. When we returned to the living room, Gordon & Mario had moved the extra chairs back against the wall & picked up the array of video games from the floor. As Viki came back into the living room, followed by Chris, the power went out again.

“Und, wieder (And, again).” Gordon’s calm sigh spoke for all of us.

A soft rumble of thunder slipped through the sky as rain began to fall heavily again. Viki re-lit the assortment of candles around the room & Chris switched on a couple of the battery operated lanterns. 

“Maybe the electric company is telling us the party is over.” Ulli’s voice was quiet as she seated herself on the couch, a touch of tiredness in her tone. All of us had been up since about 8 am. 

Mario said he was also feeling a little tired, & that he too had an early start in the morning due to a wedding he was attending at 11 am. Chris insisted that everyone stay until the heavy downpour of rain had let up. He stated he didn’t want us driving late at night, during a power outage AND while trying to navigate through a storm. After Viki offered to make a fresh pot of coffee, & told us there were still a few slices of her cinnamon cake left, everyone easily agreed to wait out the cloudburst. 

An hour quickly flew by as we enjoyed the cake & coffee by candlelight. The mood & energy in the room noticeably lifting, thanks in part to the magical effects of the sugar & caffeine, but also to the good conversation. As the time approached 2:30 am, & the heavy rain was now a drizzle, all of us agreed to call it a night. Flashlights were grabbed as a few last trips to the bathroom were made, & Ulli & I helped to clear the coffee table. Mario assisted Viki in transferring the few remaining leftovers from the chafing dishes into plastic containers, while Chris & Gordon put the living room back in order. 

As Ulli went to help clear the dining room table, I took one of the lanterns with me as I went to the kitchen to deposit the last of the empty bottles. While washing my hands I felt someone step up close behind me, lightly pressing against me, gently pinning me between themselves & the sink. I smiled in the low light & rinsed my hands, the warm water felt good. As I dried my hands I slowly shook my head, letting out a quiet giggle. Gordon had been playfully teasing me all night with suggestive double entendres, gentle grabs, M&M bombardments & stolen kisses on my cheeks. I wasn’t surprised that he was ending the night in the same fashion. Since I couldn’t turn around, I glanced out the kitchen window at the inky, rainy, darkness, my smile still in place.

“Is this your way of saying good night to me, Gordon?” My tone carrying friendly affection.

“Stay tonight.” Chris’ soft voice & sexy accent floated down to me. 

The smile slowly faded from my face & my pulse quickened. My eyes searched the wet window pane for his reflection behind me, but the deep darkness outside & the dim light from the lantern kept his image hidden. I swallowed the small lump in my throat. 

“Stay.” His repeated word spoken even more quietly the second time. 

He ran the back of his right index finger whisper soft & languidly against my right ear, back & forth...back & forth...back & forth… The excruciatingly barely-there sensation sending a shiver through me as my nipples immediately began to stiffen. I nodded slowly. His finger left my ear as his right hand carefully curled around my face, taking a delicate hold of my chin & guiding my head gently to the side & up towards him. The low light in the kitchen illuminated his handsome face in gossamer shadows, his serious eyes two glowing blue jewels. He lowered his head slowly down to me, my searching eyes closing as his warm mouth pressed tenderly to mine. His soft lips caressing me in an unhurried kiss as his long tongue glided across mine. His silver lip ring pressing gently to me. A soft moan escaped my throat & was answered by a low, equally soft moan from him. Hearing & feeling that small vocalization of passion from him caused me to whimper into his slow kiss with quiet need. He responded to my whimpered arousal by snaking his silky tongue around mine, capturing it & stroking it passionately, possessively, breathing another low moan into me. Once again, his kiss made time stand still & the world fade away. 

After a few moments, I eased my face back to catch my breath, my eyes as big & round as saucers as I looked up at him, his lips glistening & slightly parted. The seriousness in his eyes also worn on his face as he looked at me, his nostrils flaring slightly. Laughter erupted out in the living room & his deep gaze shifted in that direction for a moment, his slim right eyebrow lifting in curiosity, before returning those two blue flames to my eyes.

“I think someone is getting ready to leave.” Chris’ voice was low & raspy, his penetrating gaze roaming across my still upturned face. 

My mouth opened slightly as if I wanted to say something, but no words came out, only a tiny audible breath. Had he touched me at that moment, in even the faintest sexual manner, I would have climaxed right then & there, whether I had his permission or not. The look on his face left no doubt that he knew that. 

“We’re leaving.” Mario’s upbeat voice popped into the dimly lit kitchen.

Chris kept his gaze on me & casually turned his head towards the producer, his deep blue eyes drifting to his friend a moment later. Chris gave Mario a warm smile as he took a relaxed, small step back, apparently in no need to hide or cover up that he’d been pressed against me. That quiet self confidence, that silent, self assured dominance that he expressed so naturally, so effortlessly, always made my heart beat a little faster. 

I turned around as Mario returned Chris’ warm expression, extending it to me with his friendly smile. But I could still see the flash of curiosity in the producer’s eyes as his gaze moved from me, back to his still smiling friend. 

“We are going.” Ulli playfully sang the announcement more than spoke it, as she stepped into the quickly filling kitchen, setting down her soda can on the counter. She stepped over to her band mate, stretched up & gave him a peck on the cheek, making him smile in his familiar sweetly shy manner. She then turned to me, giving me the same quick kiss on the cheek.

“Ciao, ciao everybody. Come, Mario, I want to go before it starts to rain crazy again.”

The songstress stepped out of the murky light of the kitchen & Mario explained that he would be following Ulli part of the way home to her place in case the sky opened up again, just as an extra safety precaution. Chris gave Mario a commendable wink & a friendly pat on the shoulder. 

“Danke (Thank you).” Chris’ appreciation spoken with quiet sincerity. 

Mario responded with a quick tip of his head & a smile, also giving me a small wave of his hand.

“Ciao, Maddy.” 

“Ciao, Mario” I had always liked Mario a lot, & the tone of my farewell showed it. 

As the producer left the kitchen, Chris told me he was going to walk the two of them out, his smile to me sweet. I gave him a little nod, my eyes falling for a moment on his small silver lip ring, then following his tall frame as he casually trailed after his friends. A wide smile spread across my face as Viki hurriedly passed by the kitchen, scampering after the other three, the soft rubber soles of her slippers shuffling quickly on the wooden floor. 

“Ich komme auch (I’m coming also)!” Her excited plea made me chuckle. 

As the foursome paused in the entryway while everyone put on their shoes & coats by lantern light, chatting about the next time they were going to see each other, either at the studio on Monday or a future lunch date, I sighed quietly & smiled to myself. I left the kitchen & stood outside the crowded entryway as everyone prepared to step out into the cold drizzle of the late night. I waved to Ulli & Mario once more as they spoke over each other telling me they’ll see me on Monday. Ulli opened the front door & let out a high pitched “ooh!” as a damp, icy breeze blew into her then swirled around the little group then passed me. I immediately shivered & wrapped my arms tightly around my coatless self. Viki let out a similar high pitched exclamation as she made a ‘brrrrr” face at Ulli. Mario laughed quietly noting out loud that they might all freeze to death before making it to their cars. Although noticeably chilled, Viki & Ulli agreed with him, joining in his good-natured chuckles. Chris grabbed the door high above Ulli’s head, squinting his eyes as the cold air hit his face & in a loud tone announced in German that if they all stood in the open doorway a little longer maybe they could warm up the night air outside to an acceptable level by allowing all the heat from inside the house to escape…& wouldn’t that be nice. I started laughing, even though my teeth were chattering, & Ulli & Viki began cackling as Viki quickly pushed Ulli out the door, followed by a snorting Mario who tripped over Viki’s abandoned slippers as he stepped outside. Chris shook his head & sighed, a small smile on his lips as he closed his eyes & gently banged his forehead against the door a couple of times.

“You sound like an old woman.” Gordon’s playfully disgruntled voice floated out behind me, above my head, to his long time, currently suffering, friend. 

Chris reopened his eyes, grabbed a thick black scarf from the coat pegs on the wall next to the door & stepped out into the cold night, not looking back. 

“I feel like an old woman sometimes with these people.” The singer’s voice cranky & humorous at the same time as he shut the door behind him. 

“So…” Gordon’s small exclamation made me turn to him.

The very bad man stood there, both of his hands shoved deep into the pockets of his pants, fluffy red slippers on his feet, I smiled when I saw them. His eyes traveled over me, once, head to toe & back up again.

“If you weren’t staying here tonight & I asked you to stay at my place tonight, would you?” 

Gordon’s question caught me off guard & I found myself speechless. After a small pause I nodded.

“Yes.” My voice was as small as my nod but I was being honest. 

A teasing smile formed on the musician’s mouth. A little sparkle danced across his eyes.

“You’re just horny.” His warm chuckle mingling easily with his words as he pulled one hand from his pocket & rubbed the back of his head.

I laughed quietly & shook my head as I looked down at my own red slippers. He was right. He took a single step towards me & scooped me up in his arms, the way he had done when he came over to my apartment on a similar rainy night, so many months ago. And just as I had done back then, my knees rested against his sides as my ass rested in his palms, my hands holding onto the back of his neck, the only thing missing was his brightly colored, pinwheel bouquet. He walked back into the low lit kitchen & sat me down on the counter next to the sink. I dropped my hands from around his neck, resting them on my lap, my smile to him warm. His hands stayed on my thighs, giving them a light squeeze. Both of our eyes moved with a gentle purpose over each other’s faces as we tried to read each other. The silence between us was comfortable, the way it always is with two close friends. Soft thunder slipped through the sky. 

“I’m going.” Gordon’s tone was solemn & soft like the thunder. 

My eyes watched his face.

“Don’t look at me like that.” The same quiet tone. Not a trace of malice in his voice. 

I heard his words but my expression didn’t change, the warmth in my eyes genuine. My continued silence still as comfortable. As strange as it may seem, since I was in Chris’ home, soon to stay here for the night, I was offering myself to Gordon. Not in an overt “bang me here on the counter” way, but in a different way. If he wanted to kiss me...or touch me...before he left, then I wanted that too. 

His eyes lowered to my chest as his hand came up, gently fondling one of my breasts over my sweater. I kept my relaxed gaze on his face & pushed my chest out to meet his touch. His hand moved to my other breast, giving it the same gentle attention. The fondling sensation felt good but I didn’t have to make a sound to let him know that. My nipples came to life with his touch, his right thumb greeting the right one, his left thumb greeting the left. After a few moments, he pushed both of his hands up under my sweater & caressed my breasts roughly over my bra. A surprised gasp fell from my lips as I looked down at his fingers moving demandingly beneath the material. I kept my hands in my lap. I wanted to leave no doubt that his advances were invited.

After a few lingering strokes, he removed his hands with a sigh & pulled my sweater neatly back down. He lifted his eyes to me, a small wicked gleam reflecting back at me, the same wicked gleam gracing the small smile on his lips. 

“Good night, Maddy.” A low thickness to his voice.

He leaned in & kissed my cheek.

“Good night, Gordon.” A soft thickness to mine. 

He left the kitchen & put on his boots & coat in the entryway. I hopped off the counter & watched him from the kitchen entrance. The front door opened & Viki quickly walked in, teeth chattering, as she lowered the hood from her jacket. Chris came in behind her, the thick black scarf covering his face up to his eyes. Gordon stood up & stomped his heavy black boots on the floor a couple of times, testing for a snug fit as he looked over at Chris who was waiting by the closed door.

“You look like you’re going to rob a bank.” Gordon’s description of his former band mate fairly accurate.

Viki’s cheerful “haha!” made me laugh as she unzipped her well insulated hoodie. Chris raised his gloved middle finger at his friend in a silent salute causing Gordon to snort. 

“I’m not going out again, so I say bye bye here.” Viki stretched up & kissed Gordon on the chin. He returned her farewell with a kiss on her forehead. Chris opened the door & Gordon gave me a little wave as he stepped out into the icy night. Chris pointed his gloved hand to a set of keys sitting on a small table in the entryway & in a scarf muffled voice asked Viki to hand them to him so that he could pull her car into the driveway, since Ulli had left. As she gave him the keys & as he shut the door, Gordon could be overheard telling Chris, in German, to bring him some money back too, when he got done robbing that bank tonight. Viki & I couldn’t help but laugh as Chris finally closed the door. After Viki hung up her coat & stepped back into her slippers, she briskly rubbed her upper arms trying to drive away the chill. 

“Come… I’m cold & tired. I want to go to bed.”

She grabbed my hand & playfully pulled me along into the living room where she picked up one of the two lit lanterns. I glanced back at the entryway & she answered my unspoken question as she continued her march down the dark hallway.

“They will talk a little bit, yes, even in the cold. Then he will come inside, check his phone, check his messages, drink something, check his computer, play some kind, I don’t know, game thing, where he’s looking for gold or some magic guy…” 

I had to chuckle at her almost exasperated description of Chris’ night time habits, which she apparently knew all too well by heart. I quickly found myself once again in their newly decorated bedroom, & as she shut the door she pointed the lantern in the direction of a tall dresser. She told me there were sleep shirts in the second drawer & to just pick one out. As she set the lantern down & started to turn the bed down, I did as she suggested but the slightly surreal feel of the moment wasn’t lost on me. Her relaxed, matter-of-fact attitude about having me stay the night with them, though, did relax me, but it definitely added to that surreal feel, as if I was at some odd, grown up slumber party. 

I undressed down to my panties & slipped on a pretty, light grey colored sleep shirt that had black pinstriping accented across it, in delicate loops & swirls. It came down to about mid-thigh & was incredibly soft. Viki had put on a similar style shirt but in a pretty, emerald green tone with a darker green, tiny leaf pattern on it. She let me use the bathroom first & she had me try some of her night time facial products, which was fun even by lantern light. If it didn’t feel like a slumber party before, it definitely did now. A very surreal slumber party. 

Once I was done in the bathroom, it was Viki’s turn. I felt silly just standing there in their dark bedroom waiting for her, so I did what one usually does at night in a bedroom. I got into bed. Their bed. I sat in the middle of the big bed & noticed there was a third pillow in between the other two. Had it been there earlier today? Or did Viki add it when she turned down the bed? I realized it was really a non-issue, a vapid thought, but it added to the curiously odd feel of everything. 

After she returned from the bathroom, she shut the bedroom door again, set the lantern on top of the dresser, & climbed into bed. She shoo-ed me over to the middle of the bed with wiggling fingers & a sweet smile. As I lay my head back on that third center pillow, she got comfortable on her side of the bed & pulled the soft, warm covers up over us. 

We spent the next little while reminiscing about tonight’s party, & found ourselves giggling over some of the funny things that happened. Our friendly pillow talk began to slow as sleep demanded our attention. We said our good nights & snuggled down in our individual spots. That odd, surreal, almost uncomfortable feeling I’d had about the sleeping arrangements began to quickly fade as I listened to the steady rainfall & felt that wonderful, heavy drowsiness pull me under. 

My eyes slowly opened to a dimly lit bedroom that didn’t look like mine. It took a moment for the disorientation to subside before I remembered where I was. I blinked sleepily a few times but didn’t move because the cozy warmth of the bed felt so good. I was on my side, looking at an empty side of the bed. Aside from the low glow of the lantern, it was very dark & I had no idea what time it was. I didn’t see a clock on the nightstand by the empty side of the bed. Soft, steady breathing sounds came from behind me & I quietly rolled over. It was Viki, sound asleep on her side, facing me. I spotted a small digital clock on her nightstand but the way the clock was angled I couldn’t see the time. Rolling onto my back, the sound of the rain came back into focus. My eyelids were getting heavy again & I moved back onto my side, facing the empty, unslept side of the bed. Chris’ side, no doubt. 

Maybe he was going to sleep in another room. I just assumed, mistakenly it seems, that he meant for the three of us to literally sleep together in the same bed tonight. How did that saying go? When you assume, you make an ass out of u and me? I sighed. I was too sleepy & too comfortable to think any more tonight. I closed my eyes. As I began to drift off again, I heard the bedroom door quietly open & someone step into the room, closing the door carefully behind them. My eyes slowly reopened.


	22. Private Party (Part 3 - Love & Blood)

It was Chris. I immediately knew it was him, of course. But the spell of the pleasant drowsiness that I was under let my heavy eyes come to that conclusion more slowly as my sleepy gaze traveled up his long frame. 

He walked over to a wingback chair that was in the corner of the room & stood with his back to me. He pulled off his black sweater over his head, turning it right side out, & carefully hung it over the back of the chair. Underneath his sweater he wore a black, short sleeve t-shirt that had a small white symbol or maybe it was a logo, on the back of the right shoulder. I squinted a little to try & bring the design into focus but couldn’t make it out. The dim light of the lantern, combined with my drowsy vision, thwarted my mild curiosity, & I was fine with that. 

My eyes followed him as he stepped over to the tall dresser & began removing his bracelets, placing them quietly one at a time into what looked like a wooden, or woven, low sided basket. He turned & came towards the nightstand on his side of the bed, removed his watch & set it down, then he began removing all of his rings, placing them in two neat, distinct groupings, left hand & right hand. A tiny smile crept across my face as I silently observed his night time ritual for the first time. 

We’d been together a couple of additional times before tonight, but they were both at my place, & he would just fall asleep & then leave the next morning. No official night or morning routine from him for me to see. This was the first time I’d stayed the night in his home, & I enjoyed watching him. 

As he placed the last silver ring next to his watch, he glanced down at me. I didn’t try to hide the fact that I was awake, but I also didn’t make it obvious that I was. I moved my sleepy eyes up to him & wasn’t sure if he even noticed that they were open. The very low light in the room barely reached the top of the bed, casting the area in murky darkness. He watched me for a moment, his face relaxed, his eyes showing a haze of sleepiness, beard stubble shadowing his jaw & square chin. A very long day & night, though, still couldn’t minimize the fact that he was the most handsome man I’d ever seen, & my quiet fluttering heart readily agreed. 

He turned, & as he passed the tall dresser he picked up the lantern & left the bedroom, closing the door silently behind him. A few moments later I could hear the water running in the bathroom. I stayed on my right side, my eyes gliding over all of his rings, admiring the different sizes & shapes. Some of the designs were detailed while others more simple. I yawned as thunder groaned in the distance. Maybe the storm was moving off. Maybe it was finally tired & yawning, too. 

I closed my eyes & felt myself begin to drift off again. I must’ve fallen asleep for a little while as my eyes reopened when I felt movement in the bed. The lantern glowed softly, back on top of the dresser, & I watched Chris roll onto his back next to me, pulling the covers over his bare chest & up to his shoulders. He let out a muted yawn & looked over at me. Again, I didn’t try to hide that I was awake, sort of. I looked back at him, blinking slowly. 

“I thought you were sleeping.” His gentle, low voice was more than a whisper, but not much more.

“I was.” My voice as carefully quiet as his.

His mouth formed into a small, guilty smirk.

“I woke you up. I’m sorry, Maddy.” 

I gave a little shake of my head.

“No, you didn’t.” 

Chris turned onto his side to face me, being extra careful to jiggle the mattress as little as possible, Viki still sleeping peacefully behind me. He gave me a small, sweet smile. Even in the barely lit room I could see the soft glimmer in his clear, reflective blue eyes. 

“You should get some sleep. It’s very late.” The caring tone in his voice as warmly sincere as the day I first met him. His mild accent gently seductive. 

My eyes moved across his face but I didn’t say anything. His arms were under the covers so that only the tops of his bare shoulders were visible. His eyes moved over my face in the same relaxed manner. His voice also silent. 

“Do you always take your rings off at night?” 

He blinked quickly a couple of times as if trying to figure out what I meant. Then his brow lifted in enlightenment. 

“Oh, ja (yes), my rings. No...not always.”

He pulled his right arm out from under the covers & looked at his hand.

“Sometimes at night, especially when I have a late night, my fingers get a little...um…”

He wiggled his long fingers as he searched for a word.

“Big? Is that right? Like sausages?” He wrinkled his nose as if unsure of his description.

I giggled quietly.

“They get swollen? Puffy?” My words cloaked in gentle humor. 

His eyes opened wider & he nodded.

“Puffy? Ja (Yes)?” His questioning tone delivered in his usual charming sweetness only made me giggle more.

“Ja, puffy.” I gave a little nod. 

He sighed contentedly & wiggled his fingers again.

“They get puffy, yes. But if I take off my rings then they are not so...puffy in the morning.”

I nodded, a soft muffled “mmm” highlighting my understanding. I enjoyed watching his sweet face as he explained his puffy fingered predicament. He slid his arm back under the warm covers, once again only his pale, broad shoulders peeking out. His blue eyes watched me. The black wolf, the super predator, who stalked so frequently behind those aqua jewels was nowhere to be seen. Instead, as I looked deep into his shimmering eyes, the only thing I saw was my reflection & a simple truth that I could no longer deny.

“I love you.” 

Those three words.

They slipped out of my mouth quietly, but not by accident. I wanted him to know, although I suspected he’s known for a while. I just never said the words. Those words. Those three words that either bring people closer together or sends one of them running in the opposite direction. Those three words that women are told can ruin a “good thing” with a man & scare him off. Oh my, god! Did you actually tell him that you loved him? Why would you do that?! 

The other simple truth was that my time as his personal assistant was winding down & slowly coming to an end. His new album was done, the official release pending just a few short weeks, & they were preparing for a big, new tour. A tour that he generously invited me to go on but an offer that I had declined. He didn’t need the extra personal expense of a tag-along. As the days & weeks went by, there was just simply less & less for me to do to justify him paying me a full salary. And I wasn’t about to take advantage of him. I needed a full time job to support myself. He warned me from the start that Berlin was an expensive city to live in if you wanted to live halfway decently. The only way I could do that was with a full time paycheck. We both knew that my employee status with him was in its final stages. And so… 

Those three words. 

Now it was my turn to watch his face. His gentle expression didn’t change. The softness in his eyes remained. Not a flicker of surprise or awkwardness graced his brow.

“I love you, too.” 

His four words. 

My eyes stayed on him. Waiting. The gentleness still didn’t change. The softness still remained. And that flicker of uncertainty that was never there to begin with was now quietly serious.

“As a friend.” It came out of my mouth as a whisper, as a statement. I needed to know. A friend with benefits, I wondered? As I saw myself driving away from his studio on my last day with him, I couldn’t be left wondering. I couldn’t. 

His deep blue eyes never moved from my face.

“No.” That quiet seriousness as loud as thunder in my heart. 

I blinked slowly. If I would’ve woken up at that moment in my bed, back in the states, it wouldn’t have surprised me. But I didn’t wake up. 

I felt Chris’ right arm wrap around my waist & gently pull me closer to him, his deep & solemn gaze holding me just as gently. He lifted up a bit & pulled me beneath him, turning me onto my back, his upper half leaning against me, his hips on the bed while his right leg glided up between mine, parting them until his knee came to rest against my panties. The weight of his body on mine felt warm & good. He looked down at me, his face close to mine & bathed in dusky shadows & soft light from the little metal lantern. A thick lock of dark hair fell across his left eye. He brushed his fingers against my brow, the tips of his sharp nails trailing to my cheek as he moved a few wisps of my hair behind my ear. 

His face so close to mine. Looking at me as if seeing me again for the first time. My eyes roamed over his beautiful face, pausing for a moment on that little silver lip ring that had vexed me so sweetly upon first meeting him. My thoughts, then, always secretly wondering what it would feel like pressed against my lips & other parts of my body. My hands found his lower back & slowly traveled upwards in gentle caresses, his eyes lowering to my mouth as I continued to look up at him. 

His face so close to mine. The movement from his dark eyelashes narrating the silent tracing of his gaze across my slightly parted lips. He leaned the full weight of his upper body onto me & I moaned quietly with a blossoming arousal. His eyes lifted to mine again, those two blue jewels darkening with pleasure as he responded to my vocal invitation by pressing his knee snugly against my dampening panties, nudging me. My mouth opened a little wider as my curious hands caressed his warm upper back. His right hand slid to the front of my throat, his long fingers wrapping themselves around it. 

His face so, so close to mine. He gave my neck a gentle squeeze. His eyes locked onto my eyes, carefully reading me for the first sign of any distress. I tilted my head back a little, holding his gaze as much as he held mine, & timidly wiggled against his knee. His nostrils flared as he pressed his knee firmly against me this time, his fingers tightening their grip on my throat. His eyes stayed sharply focused on mine, monitoring me, as he gave my neck a firm squeeze. I let out a soft gasp as my hands held tightly onto his upper arms, my left leg sliding high up along the side of his waist, my new invitation to him open & obvious. He wet his lips & carefully covered my mouth with his, giving my neck another firm squeeze, a small fraction of the actual strength he possessed in those deceptively delicate looking hands. 

I gasped again softly into his mouth. This time it was his long tongue that responded to me, demanding slow, deep kisses from me that I willingly submitted to. He squeezed my throat more tightly, eliciting another breathy gasp from me directly into his hungry mouth. He drew his face back & released my neck. His eyes were as dark as the night sky as they bore into me. 

He lifted up from me & dipped his arms under the covers as his knee moved from between my legs. I felt his hands take a hold of the sides of my panties, tugging them down to my thighs & then slipping them off me as I lifted my legs a little, eager to help him remove them. As soon as they were set aside, I opened my legs to him as he settled down between them & he removed his own underwear in the same quick fashion. He slipped off my nightshirt then grabbed the outside of my thighs, pulling them both high up against his sides, opening me up fully to him, the intense look in his determined eyes focused on a singular carnal need. 

Before I even had a chance to settle down into the warm bed again, I felt the back of his hand press against the inside of my thigh as he guided his stiff cock to my sensitive folds. I bit my lower lip & glanced down between our bodies, holding onto the back of his neck, as he brushed the smooth head of his large shaft slowly, repeatedly, up & down between my wet petals, parting them. I moaned softly with great pleasure at the wonderfully sensual feeling. My audible approval only encouraging him to continue as he also added small teasing bumps against my aroused, but still unsatisfied, clitoris. He watched my face as my enjoyment was on full display, my half closed eyes dual, swooning mirrors. 

His face dipped down & he gave my kiss swollen lower lip a sharp nip with his teeth that sent an electrical charge up my spine. Before my little surprised whimper even had time to fade, I felt him press himself tightly against my opening, smoothly entering me with a single forceful push. My nails dug into his upper arms as I took in a sharp breath, his first thrust always taking my breath away. Previously, he’d always given me a few moments for my body to reacquaint itself with his large size by easing me around him with slower, gentle strokes. Tonight, he had something else in mind as his desire was unwilling to be reigned in. 

He quickly inserted his full length deep into me with a second forceful push causing my back to arch. My legs instinctively clutched his sides tightly, my toes pointed, my nails raking down his upper arms as I let out a soft, stifled cry of pleasure & sensual agony. I turned my head to the side & shut my eyes as he began to repeatedly thrust roughly & quickly into me. After a moment I opened my eyes again & saw Viki quietly watching me, laying on her side, her right hand tucked under her head, her left hand resting on the bed. 

I watched her face, my eyes heavy with a dreamy lust & my mouth partly open. Soft grunts spilled rhythmically from my lips as my body rocked back & forth with each of Chris’ hard slams. He grabbed the underside of my left knee & pushed my leg higher up along his side, opening me up even further & deeper to his aggressive passion. I whimpered loudly & turned my face back to him, his own lascivious grunts filling the twilight glow of his bedroom with animal heat. After a few more strokes his movements completely stopped & he hung his head, panting. He let out a loud sigh but I knew he hadn’t finished. 

“Shit…” His voice was thick & deep but also slightly hushed. 

He raised his head & looked at me, small beads of sweat glistened along his forehead & temples. I ran my hands gently up & down his upper arms, my left leg still held by his hand, my right fingertips lightly tracing his sleeve tattoo from his shoulder to his wrist. I knew why he had stopped. He didn’t want to cum yet. He glanced over at Viki & blinked slowly, his face & breathing more relaxed but his eyes were still filled with dark heat. 

Viki leaned up towards him & gave him a soft kiss on his lips, letting the covers fall from her chest & puddle around her waist. As her kiss lingered, Chris’ right hand let go of my leg & found the bottom hem of her sleep shirt, gathering the loose material in his hand, pulling the shirt up at the same time. She moved her face back from his but remained leaned up towards him as she pulled the sleep shirt off, dropping it behind her, leaving her only in her panties. 

She took a hold of his face gently between her hands & gave him a deeper but still soft kiss. As I watched them kiss I lowered my left leg, but before my foot could touch the mattress, Chris’ right hand was immediately behind my knee again, pushing my leg back up to its high perch against his side. His grip on my leg was firm as he began to roll his hips back & forth rhythmically, moving himself in & out of me gently this time. My head tilted back slightly & my eyes closed as I moaned in low tones with occasional whimpers being drawn out of me by an extra deep roll of his hips. 

My eyes remained closed as my hands held onto his upper arms, squeezing occasionally, my thoughts lost in a thick, swirling fog of sensual pleasure & relaxed acceptance. I had never been intimate with more than one person at a time & yet what was happening now didn’t feel strange. I didn’t know why. The only thing I did know was that my brain & body were both lit up with an intense, deeply satisfying arousal that bloomed inside me like a fragrant, rare flower. And the steady rain that was falling outside only fed that dark, exotic blossom. 

My eyes slowly reopened when when I felt soft lips on mine initiating a tender kiss. It was Viki. I responded to her sweet affection with my heavy lidded eyes still open, my gaze falling on Chris behind her. His face serious & seductive as his sparkling eyes watched me, his hips picking up their pace, my soft gasp breaking Viki’s kiss. She smoothed my hair off my forehead in a comforting manner & her eyes were filled with passion & a gentle concern. Chris pressed his weight down on me & began to drive his hard cock into me with a demanding, rapid force again. His right hand let go of my leg & clamped down firmly around the front of my throat. The fire in his eyes burned brightly with wicked blue flames as his hand squeezed tightly, his thick shaft showing no mercy in its pounding relentlessness. 

My sporadic gasps mixed with passionate cries & animal grunts in a vocal cocktail that echoed around the room. My left hand clenched his forearm as my right hand pushed against his chest. His sharp eyebrows knotted & something darker & slightly sinister crept across his face as he gave my throat a breath stopping squeeze. He held his intense grip for a few seconds, his mouth partially open, thick locks of his dark hair dangling across his brow, the inferno in his eyes on full display, & a shuddering breath coming from somewhere deep within him. He released my throat & quickly pulled out of me with a loud guttural grunt. He didn’t cum. 

I let out a groan at the sudden disconnect of his body from mine & took in a quick, deep breath & coughed, my eyes watering. Viki crawled to her side of the bed & returned with a couple of tissues. She wiped away the coughing induced tears that ran down my face & then held the tissues out to me.

“Here.” Her voice was soft & her expression gentle & understanding. 

I gladly took the offering & dabbed at my watering eyes. 

“Thanks.” My voice was also soft but raspy.

Chris stayed on his hands & knees over me breathing heavily, his head hanging down. 

“Verdammt (Damn)...fuck…” His words came out low & full of tension.

Viki glanced at him then back to me. She brushed my hair off my shoulders with her fingers & gave me a small, almost consoling smile.

“He’s not finished.” Her voice was quiet as she scanned my eyes. 

I kept my gaze on her for another moment then moved my eyes to Chris. I reached up & lightly stroked his chin to get his attention, his beard stubble felt rough against my fingers. I wanted to see his face. He lifted his head & looked at me, his face full of sexual tension, his eyes an unreadable stormy sea. Even though he’d been so rough with me, I still wanted more of him. I wanted him back inside me. I wanted him to cum.

I lifted my leg & nudged his stiff shaft with the top of my foot, carefully watching his eyes. He blinked slowly & his lips parted slightly. I nudged him again, this time gently sliding the top of my foot up & down his still throbbing length. He closed his eyes & licked his lips, his breathing steady & more relaxed. I took his silent cue & continued gently stroking him, watching the subtle changes on his face, his eyebrows slightly knotting then smoothing out again, his silky lips softly pursed then shifting to a barely there pout. He opened his mouth, his eyes still closed, & let out a long pleading moan. His eyes reopened, the stormy sea still raging. 

He leaned towards his nightstand, opened a drawer & removed a black piece of material that looked like a long silk scarf & something small that I couldn’t identify. 

“Give me your wrists.” His voice was low & his command firm.

I glanced at Viki & she gave me a little nod, the light in her eyes still glowing with passion but also a warmth.

I held up my wrists to Chris & he bound them securely with the silky material. He reached into his nightstand drawer again & removed a long, black cord. He looped the cord around the binding on my wrists then leaned up & looped both ends through a section of the bed’s headboard. He pulled on the cord, raising my arms above my head, then tied it off. My pulse sped up & my breathing quickened. I’d never been tied up or restrained before. 

I looked over at Viki again & she gently ran her hand across the top of my head in a soothing, comforting manner.

“Trust him.” Both her tone & expression were soft. 

Chris sat back on his knees & showed me the other small object that he had removed from the nightstand drawer. The little item I couldn’t identify. It was a single sided razor blade. He removed the small paper liner that held the fresh blade & a shiver ran up my spine as I eyed the everyday object with apprehension. Viki leaned down to me & kissed my cheek tenderly, then brushed her lips against my ear.

“Don’t be afraid.” Her breathy whisper reassuring. 

She brushed her lips against my ear again & gave my earlobe a tender nip with her teeth. A quiver moved through me. She slid her mouth lower & licked softly at my neck, slipping in small kisses. I let out a quiet moan at the pleasant sensation & turned my head a little, offering my neck to her. Her warm mouth latched onto a single spot & she began to give me a love bite. I felt her hand caress my lust swollen breasts, moving back & forth between them, giving each one equal attention. My moans & soft whimpers increasing with my arousal. My eyes lifted to Chris. He watched us with his stormy eyes, his gaze moving from my face to Viki’s hand on my breasts, then back to my face. 

“If you say stop, I will stop. Ok?” His serious voice as soft as my whimpers.

I nodded slowly, a small groan escaping my lips as I felt Viki bite my neck more firmly, her fingers also pinching my stiff nipples in the same firm manner. That fog of dreamy lust began to swirl around my brain again. Viki moved her face back & looked at Chris, the silent communication between them lasting but a moment. Her eyes shifted to her hand on my breasts & she started to slide her fingers languidly down my belly, her fingertips dancing lightly over my left hip & dipping down between my thighs. 

I let out a low moan as I felt her hand intimately caress me in a tender fashion, her soothing touch in stark contrast to Chris’ demanding, aggressive attention to the same delicate area only moments before. I continued moaning softly, enjoying the soft sensation as she returned her mouth to the side of my neck, resuming her work on her love bite. Chris lay back down on his left side next to me, moving himself down the bed until his face was shoulder level with me. I turned my head towards him, my heavy lidded eyes watching him, my quiet vocalizations of pleasure mingling with the sound of the rainfall. 

He raised his eyes to mine, that storm of blue flames & dark seas still easily visible in them. He stuck out the tip of his pink tongue & ran the tip of his right index finger against it, wetting it. His eyes held mine then dropped to my right breast, his wet fingertip delicately swirling the tiniest circles on my stiff nipple. My mouth opened with a breathy gasp as my eyes followed the erotic tracings of his long, slender finger. He lifted his eyes to mine again, the tip of that one finger still swirling, still circling, still teasing that hard, little pink nub. 

I kept my eyes on his eyes, my partially open mouth a flowing river of breathy moans & soft whimpers. Viki slipped two fingers into my wet folds & began to slowly stroke my slick, heated flesh, gliding over my swollen clit then down to my punished opening, then back up to my little button, repeating the circuit over & over again. I bit my lower lip as Chris watched my face, his gaze roaming back & forth between my eyes & my mouth, his saliva moistened fingertip still dancing on my straining nipple. I wiggled slowly against Viki’s hand, my bound wrists pulling against the strap that tied them to the headboard. 

Chris moved his hand away from my right breast & slid his large silky palm to my belly, giving it a few gentle rubs. He lowered his head & latched his warm mouth onto my left breast, his tongue now dancing with my nipple. I moaned louder, my restrained hands pulling harder against the immobilizing strap. I wanted to touch him. I wanted to run my fingers through his hair & pull his head tighter to me. Frustrated whimpers blended with my moans of pleasure. 

As my body struggled a little beneath him, his oral attention on my breast became more assertive. His hand moved down from my belly & firmly caressed the inside of my upper thigh, his nails raking against my skin. I could feel his hand compete with Viki’s hand for space against my heated petals. Viki moved her fingers up to my excited clit while Chris pushed his long middle finger into my tight opening, pumping it quickly in & out of me. I groaned, drawing my legs up & wanting to part them wider, but they were confined between my two partners. Viki began to rub my clit quickly as she bit the side of my neck hard. I cried out, my mind a blur of pain & intense pleasure, my body struggling against the restraints. The sensual combination of Chris & Viki’s hands & mouths stimulating me in unison sent me rushing headlong towards that precipice once more. 

“I’m gonna cum..” My voice came out strained & desperate. 

Neither one of them let up, but instead only increased the intensity of their oral & digital affections. Viki biting me even harder the second time & Chris nipping sharply at my aching nipple then biting the side of my swollen breast. Both of their fingers maddeningly relentless, demanding & greedy. 

I tugged as hard as I could against the strap that held my arms above my head & also against the black silk scarf that bound my wrists, my whimpered cries & struggling only adding fuel to their erotic fire. I was beginning to fall off the edge of that cliff & I wanted Chris to know that I wouldn’t be able to stop this time.

“Chris… I’m gonna cum…now…” My words delivered in a pleading, raspy whine.” 

He released my tortured breast from his wicked mouth & looked up at me. His eyes gleamed as he slid his middle finger out of me & inserted it into his mouth, licking it clean. My breath started coming in erratic gasps as Viki’s fingers sent a shudder through me. 

Chris reached down & picked up the single edged razor blade from the mattress & nicked the top of my breast. 

"Cum for me. Now." His order spoken in a stern, strict tone I hadn't heard from him before. It pushed me over the edge. 

A small trickle of bright red blood began to dribble over my breast & down my chest. That sharp little sting ignited something deep within me & I cried out loudly as a deep, powerful orgasm rocketed through my entire body. My bound wrists yanked against the strap as Chris moved quickly back on top of me while Viki pulled back. He pushed my legs wide apart & plunged his cock deep into me up to his base. He immediately began pounding his thick shaft in & out of me hard & fast which extended the agonizing bliss of my climax. 

Since I couldn’t hold onto him, all I could do was look up at him as my orgasm made my brain fuzzy & my body weak. I moaned repeatedly as he roughly took his pleasure from me. I didn’t want him to be gentle with me at this moment. I wanted him to be harsh. I wanted him to be brutal. I wanted him to punish me. 

“Please…” My voice was almost gone as I stared up at him.

Several thick locks of his now damp, dark hair bounced off his forehead with each powerful thrust as his eyes burned into me. I glanced at the razor blade laying next to me. Then I looked back up at him. I didn’t need to say anything. He grabbed the sharp blade & nicked me a second time next to the first cut. I yelped. Another bright red trickle sprang from my flesh & snaked down my heaving chest. His mouth opened & a shaky breath slipped out as his eyes followed the new blood trail down to my belly where it joined the first trickle. He lifted his gaze back up to my face. His cock driving into me without mercy. A different, much darker lust in his eyes that I hadn’t seen before. I nodded.

The third nick was on the inside of my other breast. I grunted, tilting my head back. I orgasmed a second time. Pain & pleasure a white hot explosion in my brain. I looked down. A third bright trail of blood running down me, this time dribbling off to my side. 

Chris grunted & I could tell he was trying to hold off again, the tension knotting his brow. He held the bloody razor blade between his thumb & index finger & used his other three fingers to smear together the different trickles of blood on my belly. The result looked like a gory finger painting. He dragged his blood stained fingers up my body & across both my breasts & nipples as his breathing quickened. He brushed his index finger & middle finger against his lips making his mouth look like he had on slightly smeared red lipstick. And it turned me the fuck on. He stared intensely into my eyes & his hips began to move more erratically. He was getting ready to cum. 

I leaned my head up towards him but couldn’t reach very far because of the restraint. I wanted to kiss him. He lowered his face to me & his kiss was surprisingly tender. He held his head as still as possible while continuing to move in & out of me, & allowed me to lick my blood from his soft lips. His kept his eyes open while I did this & he watched my face. I found something oddly sweet about that. When I had licked his lips clean, but before he pulled his face back, he whispered so softly that I almost didn’t hear him.

“Can I cum now?” His question almost innocent sounding & his eyes were big & soft as he pushed his throbbing shaft deep into me. 

I groaned & searched his face. A loving ache moved through my heart for him. I nodded.

“Yes.” My response almost as quiet as his. I lay my head back on the pillow.

He sped up his pace & intensity again, that momentary softness vanishing from his eyes. He moaned & withdrew his cock from me, raising up on his knees, he transferred the razor blade from his right hand to his left. He took a hold of his turgid shaft with his bloodied right hand & began to masturbate. His mouth opened as he watched his cock, soft grunts escaping. He spread his long legs wider apart, his now blood stained shaft straining as his hand worked quickly. His left hand came up to his chest & he gave himself a quick cut followed immediately by a second similar cut next to it. These weren’t the little nicks he gave to me. These were real cuts, longer, deeper. 

As blood immediately sprang heavily from both wounds, he let out a low shuddering groan, ejaculating in several long arcs onto my breasts & belly. His thick, white semen combining with some of the still wet blood on my skin. He let go of himself & rubbed the blood that was running down his chest, into his skin, turning parts of his chest & stomach into similar crimson finger paintings. He took a hold of his cock again, giving it a few last strokes, turning it as red as his torso. He sat back on his knees, let out a loud, deep sigh, & looked at me. 

Viki crawled over to me & released the strap from the head board, then carefully untied the black silk scarf from my wrists. She took a hold of my forearms & gently lowered my arms.

“We go down slowly or it can hurt.” The caring tone in her voice made me smile. 

As my arms lowered I knew what she meant. My shoulders ached. She held my wrists in her hands & rubbed them. I felt a similar low ache in them also. 

As I lay there for a moment, resting back on the pillow while Viki massaged my wrists, I could only imagine what I must look like. And the thing that struck me as truly odd was that THAT was my main thought. Not that this entire night might be viewed as bizarre. But I really didn’t feel like it was bizarre, though. I felt like Chris had allowed me into the most private part of his life. And that involved a lot of trust on his part. He could have easily let me to go home tonight instead of asking me to stay & none of this would have happened. Although I don’t think any of this was planned, I do believe the intention was to have me simply sleep in the same bed with them & if something happened, ok. And if nothing happened other than sleep then that was ok, too. He also told me that he loved me. Not as a friend. That hadn’t really sunk in yet, either. 

“Go get clean. You don’t want to sleep like this.” Viki’s tone was quiet & again caring, her nose wrinkling slightly. 

Chris leaned towards her & gave her a gently passionate kiss. As he pulled back he gave her a small, sweet smile which she returned to him.

“Go.” Her voice soft as she looked at him. 

He climbed out of bed & turned his attention to me. He held out his blood stained hand. I sat up & got out of bed. The blood had already dried on me, but not his semen, a single thick drop rolled slowly down my chest. His eyes followed it for a moment then shifted back to my face. His relaxed expression didn’t change & he didn’t say anything, his hand still extended to me. I gave him my hand & he clasped it lightly, leading me out of the bedroom & into the dimly lit bathroom, another one of the lanterns was sitting on the counter. He turned on the shower & stepped in, turning to me & offering me his hand again. He remained silent. I placed my hand in his & stepped in also. 

The hot water felt good & the shower & bathroom quickly filled with soothing steam. We washed ourselves in a curious but comfortable silence, each of us eyeing the other, deep in thought. Once we were done he pulled me to him, looking down at me, the water running down his sleepy face. 

“I love you.” His tone was serious. His voice low & steady. His blue eyes looking into me once more. 

I looked up at him, droplets of clean, warm water dripping off his square chin. 

“I love you, too.” I didn’t need to wonder anymore. 

He lowered his head & kissed me gently. I felt like I was floating. 

After we got out of the shower & dried off, he handed me a thick, full length, white robe that was hanging behind the bathroom door. It had a small, black “V” monogrammed on the lapel. I smiled. Chris slipped on a similar full length robe that was of course, black, no monogram. I smiled again. 

We returned to the bedroom to find Viki on her phone, trying to get dressed. Her conversation was in German & she seemed to be trying to figure out how to get somewhere. I sat on the edge of the bed & combed my damp hair as Chris stood by Viki trying to tell her not to worry about the directions because he knew how to get there. His hushed advice to her was met with her shooing him away from her & shaking her head silently at him while assuring her caller that yes, in fact, she was still listening. Chris gave her a silent smirk & also shook his head. I chuckled quietly. 

When her call ended, she continued to dress quickly & explained to me that a girlfriend of hers who was scheduled to give birth in two weeks, had gone into labor about an hour ago & a neighbor had just taken her to the hospital. Her friend’s husband was in the army & was currently deployed & her mother was flying in from out of the country & wouldn’t be here until the day after tomorrow. Viki went on to explain that she was her friend’s birth coach so she needed to go to the hospital now. I wished her good luck & congratulations to her friend as the three of us headed to the entryway. As she pulled on her boots & heavy coat, Chris tried to convince her that his route to the hospital was quicker but she insisted hers was. Their friendly verbal bantering was in German but I managed to understand most of it, the end result being they each wanted to know why the other always had to be such a know-it-all & to stop rolling their eyes at the other one. They both let out exasperated sighs & I stifled a laugh. Viki grabbed her tote bag & an umbrella & gave Chris a quick kiss. She & I said our good-byes to each other with a quick hug as Chris put on a heavy coat over his robe & stepped into a pair of slip on shoes. From a crack in the door I watched him walk Viki to her car still trying to convince her that his route was better. The ice cold air outside chilled me even though I only had the door open a tiny bit. As Viki pulled into the street & drove off, Chris trotted quickly back inside, his teeth chattering as he shut & locked the door. 

He quickly removed his coat & shoes while muttering “kalt, kalt, kalt (cold, cold, cold)” over & over again. I laughed quietly as he grabbed my hand & walked us rapidly back to the bedroom, reminding me of the same thing Viki had done earlier with me. He shut the bedroom door behind us, dropped his robe onto the wingback chair, stepped out of his slippers & jumped into bed, pulling the covers up to his neck. He stared at me as I still stood by the closed door in my robe. He started chuckling.

“I’m sorry. Did I forget you?” His voice sounded tired but still carried a humorous tone.

He held up the covers & motioned me towards him with his other hand.

“Komm (Come).” His tone was playfully stern. 

I gave him a little smirk as I dropped my robe onto his, stepped out of my slippers & climbed back into the big bed at the entrance of the covers that he held up. I laughed as he grabbed me, sliding me across his naked body, depositing me on his left side where I began my night in his bed. He pulled the covers up to my chin then pulled me close to him, draping his right leg across both of mine, wrapping his right arm around me, & pinning me against him. My smile went from ear to ear as I snuggled against his chest, tucking myself under his chin. I closed my eyes, my smile still big, feeling safe & protected in his arms. I couldn’t be happier.

“Are you ok with what happened tonight?” His question was sincere & spoken in a soft voice as he rubbed my upper back soothingly.

I nodded against his chest.

“Yes.” My voice slightly muffled against his warm skin.

“I liked it. I’ve never experienced anything like that with anyone. But I felt safe with you. I trust you.” My answer equally sincere & as soft spoken as his question. 

He stroked the back of my head & then gently kissed the top of it, holding his mouth there for a few moments. He then let out a slow, contented sigh.

“Good night, Maddy.” A quiet peacefulness to his voice. 

“Good night, Chris.” The same peacefulness mirrored in mine.

I pushed off all thoughts of my last days at this job & just focused on the wonderful feeling of falling asleep in his arms. I drifted off gently to the sound of the soft rainfall & Chris' soft breathing.


End file.
